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How do I tell boyfriend I need space?


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I told my boyfriend I needed some time to myself to think for a few days and he already called me three times and left messages asking why I haven't called him. On Wednesday we already both agreed to have a break for a few days just to think.

 

Should I call him back so soon? I haven't even had time to think about what I want yet and I don't know how to tell him without insulting him that I need space. What should I do?

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You shouldn't need that much time to think. It only took me five seconds to think your boyfriend doesn't understand English.

 

If you made it clear there would be no communications for a few days, that's one thing. However, if you only told him you needed time to think but did not specify there should be no contact, then you have to take the rap here.

 

If you did not make it clear to him that the two of you should not talk during this time, call him and make it very clear to him. Then go about your meditation. If you did tell him, then just don't return his calls. Later on, let him know he needs to start listening to what you say...that may be a problem in your relationship.

 

By the way, you didn't ask me, but if you are taking time out to think about whether you want to stay with him or not, the answer is you don't. People who are really in love and who care deeply about each other usually don't have to think about that for two or three days.

 

Good luck on your decision, whatever it is you're having to decide about.

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