HLEP!!! My conciousness is killing me

[Justdoit]

Hi guys and gals,

 

I didn't think I would post this,but after reading some of these posts, some of you have great advice and care about people's problems.This might be a long post,but hope you guys will read it and give me good suggestions.

 

I went to Macau and went to china last months.This is my first time going to a night club.I though I wouldn't like it cause I thought girls in these places are generally not very nice people and is all about business.But I was fortunate that I was assigned this girl that was genuinely interested in talking to me.I see my other friends having girls that are just there for their job.Everyone got the best looking girls in the house,but I stuck with my one just because i enjoyed talking to her.I didn't even look anywhere else except her eyes and didn't touch her.Anyhow,we went upstairs to a hotel room.When she stripped down naked i realised that she wasn't that attractive.But when we went bed,we were like genuine lovers,we frend kissed the whole way,and she looked like she loved my company.I was respecting her asking her what made her comfortable,and i gave her the choice when the session should end even though i wanted it to be bit longer.I only like it when I know the other side is enjoying it.She seemed to like my respect for her.Afterward she said she really enjoyed it.I though that was what all these girls say to all customers,but afterwards talking to my other friends about my experience,they were saying how rare it's that girls working here would be so into it.All their girls were very business like they told me.

 

Strang thing is I felt more passion and intimacy with this girl than with my gf!!,but that's not my main problem.

 

The main thing i want to ask you guys is,I'm 22 years old guys still one more year to go in the US to get my degree.I just feel so guilty going to these places at such a young age,but on other hand I love sex too much and really want to go to these places often.

 

Do you think i'm too young to start venturing into this type of stuff,or do you think I can still lead a decent and dignified life going to these places? i'm under immense pressure from my parents.They seem to think that if i like this stuff, i am doomed for life.

 

Also i seem to be more relaxed when i'm with girls that are paid,cause it justifies my action.But with my gf,i feel if i have sex with her and later i break up i feel guilty. But to me I think I am decent person in every department.i don't smoke,don't drink at all,polite,hard working,and sensitive.

 

My only weakness is my libido!

 

Help,any comments will help me tremendously!!

 

P.S: I'm sorry for my english

[Tony T]

1. "Do you think i'm too young to start venturing into this type of stuff,or do you think I can still lead a decent and dignified life going to these places?"

 

You're not too young to go to these places, although most people don't get into it as passionately as it sounds you have the desire to. You must be some kind of a horny dude.

 

As far as leading a decent and dignified life, you have already ceased to do that by cheating on your girlfriend. So that's out the door. If you are going to continue to see prostitutes, break up with your girlfriend...and tell her why so she won't feel bad about losing you...and go for it. Also be prepared to die of AIDs or at best catch some nice diseases that'll rot your dick off at some point if you are unfortunate enough to catch something from some lady on the street.

 

2. "i'm under immense pressure from my parents.They seem to think that if i like this stuff, i am doomed for life."

 

You have a lot of cojones (that's balls in Spanish) telling your parents that you enjoy seeing prostitutes. I think this lacks respect for your parents...they really don't want to hear their son has gone this route and they really don't deserve to have to worry that you may one day die of AIDs or become HIV positive.

 

If you aren't going to respect yourself or your girlfriend, at least show some respect to your parents.

 

3. "i seem to be more relaxed when i'm with girls that are paid,cause it justifies my action."

 

You may have some developmental problem in your emotional growth process where you feel more comfortable not getting involved emotionally. A paid business transaction, money for sex, circumvents not only a lot of emotion but the process of meeting, courting, communication, etc. Either you are very lazy or you are very scared of being close to a female who really deeply cares for you.

 

If you continue this course, you will pay in the end because you will die a very lonely man. But that's OK if you are willing to pay that price to get laid. Also, your accountant cannot register your prostitutes as a business expense so if you like sex a great deal, you will pay through the butt...pardon the pun.

 

4. "But with my gf,i feel if i have sex with her and later i break up i feel guilty."

 

Wow, you can cheat on your girlfriend and have sex with a whore and not feel guilty. But if you make love with your girlfriend and later find the two of you aren't meant for each other, then you will feel guilty.

 

Somehow, I think you were absent for a lot of stuff your parents tried to teach you. Your moral training and your logic is sadly deficient.

 

I suggest you if you must feel the emotion of guilt that you learn when it is appropriate to do so. You really have it turned around here.

 

5. "But to me I think I am decent person in every department.i don't smoke,don't drink at all,polite,hard working,and sensitive."

 

Sensitive, yeah right, in your penis. It's good that you have the self esteem that you do but not smoking, not drinking, being polite and being hard working does not in itself qualify you as a decent person. There's a lot more to it than that.

 

While I will give you 50 points for all your good qualities above, I will take 200 points away for cheating on your girlfriend with a prostitute. That makes you minus 150 points from being a decent guy. Now, you need to do something about that.

 

6. "My only weakness is my libido!"

 

No, your weakness is self control. Every young guy with the normal amount of testosterone has a fierce sex drive. There are various ways of controlling it. Many of them don't have a girlfriend to have sex with. You do. Most decent guys work this drive out in various ways such as masturbation (and you also have a girlfriend) but they don't cheat on their lady and pay for whores.

 

I urge you to discuss this with your poor girlfriend. By having sex with her after being with the prostitutes, you put her life in jeopardy. She doesn't deserve that. She also doesn't deserve a guy who is more concerned about getting his libido satisfied as often as possible at any expense than he is about being with her and making her happy.

 

I'm not going to fault you if you want to set out on a life of seeing prostitutes often if that's the life you want to life. It's your choice. But leave innocent people out of it. Set your girlfriend free so she can live a healthy and emotionally happy life with someone else.

 

Also, understand that in time you will get tired of shelling out money to women who could care less if you are dead or alive as long as you pay them. You are crazy as hell if you think this prositute you screwed really cared about you. They are trained to respond in whatever way is required to get the maximum amount of money and tip they can...and to get customers to return frequently with their wallets filled with cash.

 

If you think this girl is into you so much, just watch how fast she screws the next guy after you leave.

 

You are an idiot and a sucker if you think for even a mili-second that this prostitute was even slightly fond of you. If you are so sure, next time you see her ask if she'll start humping you at no charge.

 

I feel sorry for you, I feel sorry for your girlfriend, I feel sorry for your parents, but I really love the style of the whore you had sex with. Now, there's a pro.

 

May the Gods be with you...you'll need every one of them.

[Buckeyegal]

Hmmm, decent and dignified life...frequently visiting prostitutes? Nope, I don't see how the two of these things go together. Did you really think that people here would pat you on the back and say "Why sure, nothing wrong with paying for sex, risking your health as well as your girlfriend's, why hey, that's pretty decent of you!" C'mon, surely you realize the fallacy of continuing this kind of life, don't you? Putting yourself at risk to contract all of those lovely stds out there, engaging in emotionless, meaningless sex, betraying your girlfriend's trust, putting her health at risk too.

 

Tony's right,it's sad that you actually think you had any real connection with this prostitute. Sure she seemed to "genuinely" want to talk to you, but that's because she was "genuinely" interested in your dollars. That's probably her hook, since she's not as physically attractive as the other girls according to you. And to say that you "genuinely" made love to each other, c'mon, you screwed each other that's all. Even if she hadn't been a prostitute, just a girl that you had picked up that night...it still would of been just sex, how can you make *love* to someone that you've just met, only known for an hour? Probably less in her case, time is money after all in her business.

 

I'd find this whole scenario sad if you were single, but the fact that you have a girlfriend who most likely doesn't know any of this, makes it horrendous. You blame your libido? What a crock! You owe it to her to tell her so that she can end it with you. If you go back to her, and say nothing, continue the relationship, then you really are a scumbag.

Hi guys and gals, I didn't think I would post this,but after reading some of these posts, some of you have great advice and care about people's problems.This might be a long post,but hope you guys will read it and give me good suggestions. I went to Macau and went to china last months.This is my first time going to a night club.I though I wouldn't like it cause I thought girls in these places are generally not very nice people and is all about business.But I was fortunate that I was assigned this girl that was genuinely interested in talking to me.I see my other friends having girls that are just there for their job.Everyone got the best looking girls in the house,but I stuck with my one just because i enjoyed talking to her.I didn't even look anywhere else except her eyes and didn't touch her.Anyhow,we went upstairs to a hotel room.When she stripped down naked i realised that she wasn't that attractive.But when we went bed,we were like genuine lovers,we frend kissed the whole way,and she looked like she loved my company.I was respecting her asking her what made her comfortable,and i gave her the choice when the session should end even though i wanted it to be bit longer.I only like it when I know the other side is enjoying it.She seemed to like my respect for her.Afterward she said she really enjoyed it.I though that was what all these girls say to all customers,but afterwards talking to my other friends about my experience,they were saying how rare it's that girls working here would be so into it.All their girls were very business like they told me. Strang thing is I felt more passion and intimacy with this girl than with my gf!!,but that's not my main problem. The main thing i want to ask you guys is,I'm 22 years old guys still one more year to go in the US to get my degree.I just feel so guilty going to these places at such a young age,but on other hand I love sex too much and really want to go to these places often. Do you think i'm too young to start venturing into this type of stuff,or do you think I can still lead a decent and dignified life going to these places? i'm under immense pressure from my parents.They seem to think that if i like this stuff, i am doomed for life. Also i seem to be more relaxed when i'm with girls that are paid,cause it justifies my action.But with my gf,i feel if i have sex with her and later i break up i feel guilty. But to me I think I am decent person in every department.i don't smoke,don't drink at all,polite,hard working,and sensitive.

 

My only weakness is my libido! Help,any comments will help me tremendously!!

 

P.S: I'm sorry for my english

[Justdoit]

But for my current gf, I actually want to share her with other guys.Besides, I also want her to let me try other girls too. Do you think it's good ideas?

 

I don't know I can tell my family and my gf for that.

 

Can you help me ,please?

 

-----------------------------------------------------------

1. "Do you think i'm too young to start venturing into this type of stuff,or do you think I can still lead a decent and dignified life going to these places?" You're not too young to go to these places, although most people don't get into it as passionately as it sounds you have the desire to. You must be some kind of a horny dude. As far as leading a decent and dignified life, you have already ceased to do that by cheating on your girlfriend. So that's out the door. If you are going to continue to see prostitutes, break up with your girlfriend...and tell her why so she won't feel bad about losing you...and go for it. Also be prepared to die of AIDs or at best catch some nice diseases that'll rot your dick off at some point if you are unfortunate enough to catch something from some lady on the street. 2. "i'm under immense pressure from my parents.They seem to think that if i like this stuff, i am doomed for life." You have a lot of cojones (that's balls in Spanish) telling your parents that you enjoy seeing prostitutes. I think this lacks respect for your parents...they really don't want to hear their son has gone this route and they really don't deserve to have to worry that you may one day die of AIDs or become HIV positive. If you aren't going to respect yourself or your girlfriend, at least show some respect to your parents. 3. "i seem to be more relaxed when i'm with girls that are paid,cause it justifies my action." You may have some developmental problem in your emotional growth process where you feel more comfortable not getting involved emotionally. A paid business transaction, money for sex, circumvents not only a lot of emotion but the process of meeting, courting, communication, etc. Either you are very lazy or you are very scared of being close to a female who really deeply cares for you. If you continue this course, you will pay in the end because you will die a very lonely man. But that's OK if you are willing to pay that price to get laid. Also, your accountant cannot register your prostitutes as a business expense so if you like sex a great deal, you will pay through the butt...pardon the pun. 4. "But with my gf,i feel if i have sex with her and later i break up i feel guilty."

 

Wow, you can cheat on your girlfriend and have sex with a whore and not feel guilty. But if you make love with your girlfriend and later find the two of you aren't meant for each other, then you will feel guilty. Somehow, I think you were absent for a lot of stuff your parents tried to teach you. Your moral training and your logic is sadly deficient.

 

I suggest you if you must feel the emotion of guilt that you learn when it is appropriate to do so. You really have it turned around here.

 

5. "But to me I think I am decent person in every department.i don't smoke,don't drink at all,polite,hard working,and sensitive."

 

Sensitive, yeah right, in your penis. It's good that you have the self esteem that you do but not smoking, not drinking, being polite and being hard working does not in itself qualify you as a decent person. There's a lot more to it than that. While I will give you 50 points for all your good qualities above, I will take 200 points away for cheating on your girlfriend with a prostitute. That makes you minus 150 points from being a decent guy. Now, you need to do something about that.

 

6. "My only weakness is my libido!"

 

No, your weakness is self control. Every young guy with the normal amount of testosterone has a fierce sex drive. There are various ways of controlling it. Many of them don't have a girlfriend to have sex with. You do. Most decent guys work this drive out in various ways such as masturbation (and you also have a girlfriend) but they don't cheat on their lady and pay for whores. I urge you to discuss this with your poor girlfriend. By having sex with her after being with the prostitutes, you put her life in jeopardy. She doesn't deserve that. She also doesn't deserve a guy who is more concerned about getting his libido satisfied as often as possible at any expense than he is about being with her and making her happy. I'm not going to fault you if you want to set out on a life of seeing prostitutes often if that's the life you want to life. It's your choice. But leave innocent people out of it. Set your girlfriend free so she can live a healthy and emotionally happy life with someone else.

 

Also, understand that in time you will get tired of shelling out money to women who could care less if you are dead or alive as long as you pay them. You are crazy as hell if you think this prositute you screwed really cared about you. They are trained to respond in whatever way is required to get the maximum amount of money and tip they can...and to get customers to return frequently with their wallets filled with cash.

 

If you think this girl is into you so much, just watch how fast she screws the next guy after you leave. You are an idiot and a sucker if you think for even a mili-second that this prostitute was even slightly fond of you. If you are so sure, next time you see her ask if she'll start humping you at no charge. I feel sorry for you, I feel sorry for your girlfriend, I feel sorry for your parents, but I really love the style of the whore you had sex with. Now, there's a pro. May the Gods be with you...you'll need every one of them.

[Tony T]

1. "But for my current gf, I actually want to share her with other guys.Besides, I also want her to let me try other girls too. Do you think it's good ideas?"

 

I think you're a pretty sick pup. There is no reason to have a girlfriend if you are going to regularly rely on protitutes for sex and companionship. It's not up to you to decide if you're going to share your girlfriend with other guys. I think that's up to her. Are you for real?

 

The next time you see your girl, tell her you are going to start seeing prostitutes on a regular basis and you don't mind sharing her sexually with many men. If she goes along with that, the two of you deserve each other...or maybe you had the same first grade teacher.

 

2. "I don't know I can tell my family and my gf for that.

 

Can you help me ,please?

 

Not a chance. You're on your own here, bub. I hope you aren't a sign of things to come in humanity.

[Miss Mojo]

hi justdoit,

 

...she looked like she loved my company.

 

this is part of the prostitutes job. she knows all about customer service and what it takes to get a customer to come back. prostitutes can be very astute business women. please don't mistake part of her job for genuine affection toward you. she probably treats most of her customers like this.

 

...but afterwards talking to my other friends about my experience,they were saying how rare it's that girls working here would be so into it.All their girls were very business like they told me.

 

they probably are business like, but you got one who is actually a nice girl who knows how to do business. not all prostitutes are carbon copies of each other. some prostitutes relate to customers better than others.

 

i used to work in a bar, and i was always nice to the customers, even the ones that i didn't particularly like. part of customer service is the company working in synergy with the customers - if i give good customer service, they will want to come back, it keeps the business going well. i liked a lot of my customers and was very popular with them. not all the other staff members were like this, and i actually used to get a lot more tips than the others because i treated them well.

 

think about it.....business is business, and a lot of people out there are nice anyway.

 

Do you think i'm too young to start venturing into this type of stuff,or do you think I can still lead a decent and dignified life going to these places?

 

i don't think it really has anything to do with age. you want sex, plain and simple....but at what cost? if i were you, i would wear 3 condoms at once and disinfect myself afterwards. these women make a living out of sex with many men in one day. god knows what anyone could give a woman who could pass something on to you.

 

are these women tested frequently???

 

i'm under immense pressure from my parents.They seem to think that if i like this stuff, i am doomed for life.

 

pwhoar!!! i can't believe you told your parents. i can guarantee you they are worried sick now. they're probably worried about you catching something and being doomed with a disease.

 

Also i seem to be more relaxed when i'm with girls that are paid,cause it justifies my action.But with my gf,i feel if i have sex with her and later i break up i feel guilty.

 

do you feel guilty that you cheated on your girlfriend? your poor girlfriend. i'm sorry, but i feel so bad for her. if my boyfriend cheated on me with a prostitute, i would want to know so i could kick his sorry butt out of my life.

 

But to me I think I am decent person in every department.i don't smoke,don't drink at all,polite,hard working,and sensitive.

 

buddy, you could win the nobel prize for all humanity, but it still won't stop you from exposing yourself to diseases more than your average guy. it still doesn't change the fact that you have betrayed your girlfriend, and it doesn't change the fact that i think you need to look at why you are more comfortable with having sex with a prostitute than you are with another person.

 

think health here.....for your sake, your girlfriend's and your family's and please DO NOT even consider keeping your girlfriend and sleeping with prostitutes behind her back. that kind of behaviour would be unforgivable, sickening and selfish beyond selfish.

 

best wishes

[Miss Mojo]

yes, DEFINITELY tell her you want to break up with her. a lot of people break-up with their partner for this reason.

 

it is only natural to want to be with other people before you settle down with one. you are not ready to settle down with one.

 

your girlfriend and your family might be upset when you break off this relationship, but i guarantee you, if you continue this relationship and sleep with other people while you are still with her, the consequences will be 100 times worse if you don't break-up with her.

[marzipan75]

I don't think you are necessarily a bad person but you are hurting your girlfriend. Why don't you stop hurting your girlfriend and tell her that you need your freedom right now. Think about how you would feel if your girlfriend was fooling around with other men behind your back while you have been gone. How would you feel? You would want to know right? Also, if you have had sex with your girlfriend then you do owe it to her not to put her at risk of getting any std's. I am not saying that you have any but where you are it is very possible for you to get one and if you happen to pass it on to her when you go back to her then she will immediately know what you have been doing.

 

It sounds like you are kind of messed up. You sound confused between the freedom you are experiencing on one hand and then the love of your girlfriend waiting back when you get home. This is not fair to either of you and you need to do some growing. Also think about this, is part of the excitement of what you are doing maybe because you are fooling around behind her back? Do you want to get caught? It sounds like you do. If you love your gf like you say you do then you will do the right thing, break up with her before you cause her anymore hurt. What you are doing is wrong and you can avoid hurting her if you really want to keep doing what you are doing by being honest with her and telling her you are not in a good position to be in a relationship right now.

 

Think about that.

Hi guys and gals, I didn't think I would post this,but after reading some of these posts, some of you have great advice and care about people's problems.This might be a long post,but hope you guys will read it and give me good suggestions. I went to Macau and went to china last months.This is my first time going to a night club.I though I wouldn't like it cause I thought girls in these places are generally not very nice people and is all about business.But I was fortunate that I was assigned this girl that was genuinely interested in talking to me.I see my other friends having girls that are just there for their job.Everyone got the best looking girls in the house,but I stuck with my one just because i enjoyed talking to her.I didn't even look anywhere else except her eyes and didn't touch her.Anyhow,we went upstairs to a hotel room.When she stripped down naked i realised that she wasn't that attractive.But when we went bed,we were like genuine lovers,we frend kissed the whole way,and she looked like she loved my company.I was respecting her asking her what made her comfortable,and i gave her the choice when the session should end even though i wanted it to be bit longer.I only like it when I know the other side is enjoying it.She seemed to like my respect for her.Afterward she said she really enjoyed it.I though that was what all these girls say to all customers,but afterwards talking to my other friends about my experience,they were saying how rare it's that girls working here would be so into it.All their girls were very business like they told me. Strang thing is I felt more passion and intimacy with this girl than with my gf!!,but that's not my main problem. The main thing i want to ask you guys is,I'm 22 years old guys still one more year to go in the US to get my degree.I just feel so guilty going to these places at such a young age,but on other hand I love sex too much and really want to go to these places often. Do you think i'm too young to start venturing into this type of stuff,or do you think I can still lead a decent and dignified life going to these places? i'm under immense pressure from my parents.They seem to think that if i like this stuff, i am doomed for life. Also i seem to be more relaxed when i'm with girls that are paid,cause it justifies my action.But with my gf,i feel if i have sex with her and later i break up i feel guilty. But to me I think I am decent person in every department.i don't smoke,don't drink at all,polite,hard working,and sensitive.

 

My only weakness is my libido! Help,any comments will help me tremendously!!

 

P.S: I'm sorry for my english