Please comment..

[wing]

Do you know why some people think a guy who is " needy " is not a negative term at all?? Because they believe it is perhaps the best tell-tale sign that he adores his gf

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "Do you know why some people think a guy who is " needy " is not a negative term at all??"

 

Everybody is entitled to their own opinion but I think most emotionally healthy individuals would not give high marks to a guy who is needy. Most would either give him some advice or send him to a psychologist. Men who are needy are, for the most part, pathetic.

 

2. "Because they believe it is perhaps the best tell-tale sign that he adores his gf"

 

Not even slightly. A needy guy would give a lot of attention to his girlfriend out of insecurity, jealousy, low self esteem, etc. That's not healthy at all. Great relationships are composed of two people who are confident, self sufficient, loving, kind, respectful, etc.

 

There is no correlation between adoration and neediness, not even in stretching the definition to the max. And any self respecting lady would be repulsed with a guy who seemed needy and would not be attracted to that at all.

 

Now, maybe you have misunderstood the terms you used here. Needy implies someone who is around all the time because he or she simply can't function without the other person or who is emotionally, physically, or financially needy on a continuing basis. If that's what you meant, this person is truly pathetic.

 

Adoration, on the other hand, means a person has deep respect and admiration for the other person but is still willing to give them the space and consideration required for them to live a life separate from them as well as a life within the context of the relationship.

 

I would avoid a needy person like the plague...but would be kind enough to point them in the direction of help.

[sparkle]

No, I don't know why some people think that being "needy" is a positive quality. Personally, I consider it to be something more negative than positive.

 

And I disagree that it's the "best tell-tale sign that he adores his gf". It could very well be a sign that he's insecure or not very confident about himself, and it may have nothing to do with the girl. Maybe it's not that particular girl he's so attached to, but rather any girl who's with him at that time, and he could be like that with every girl he dates.

 

Some words that come to mind when I think of "needy":

 

clingy

 

desperate

 

And neither sounds too positive to me.

 

I think my reply is unclear, but so was your post.

[Tess]

When you said about low self-esteem, I don't know whether it can apply it or not.

 

I heard that other people discussed with each other about " cheap/slut" words

 

One said," I don't think a " cheap/slut" can simply be defined by her/his action since from the outside,we can never really what's motivating this person to do whatever it's that's considered cheap/slutty.I personally believe that a girl who has sex with 10 guys because she's got no self-esteem & finds a temporary"loving" feeling is much less of a cheap/slut than a woman who sleeps with one man she's no feeling for so he'll buy her diamonds and cars.It's persceptive.Ultimately,we aren't to judge other,& although we all do,it's something you can strive for. "Cheap/slut" is very judgmental word to use and it's used with such disregard that definding it's impossible"

 

====) I saw that they made a comparison between a girl who sleeps with 10 guys "because she's got no self-esteem and finds a temporary loving feeling"-as less of a "slut" than the diamond/car "slut.

 

The bottom line is How you'd know if the girl has low self-esteem vs a high sex drive vs lack of respect for her body vs any other issue.?

 

Can you help me for that,please? since i'm very vague!!

 

-----------------------------------------------------------

YOU ASK: "Do you know why some people think a guy who is " needy " is not a negative term at all??" Everybody is entitled to their own opinion but I think most emotionally healthy individuals would not give high marks to a guy who is needy. Most would either give him some advice or send him to a psychologist. Men who are needy are, for the most part, pathetic. 2. "Because they believe it is perhaps the best tell-tale sign that he adores his gf"

 

Not even slightly. A needy guy would give a lot of attention to his girlfriend out of insecurity, jealousy, low self esteem, etc. That's not healthy at all. Great relationships are composed of two people who are confident, self sufficient, loving, kind, respectful, etc. There is no correlation between adoration and neediness, not even in stretching the definition to the max. And any self respecting lady would be repulsed with a guy who seemed needy and would not be attracted to that at all. Now, maybe you have misunderstood the terms you used here. Needy implies someone who is around all the time because he or she simply can't function without the other person or who is emotionally, physically, or financially needy on a continuing basis. If that's what you meant, this person is truly pathetic. Adoration, on the other hand, means a person has deep respect and admiration for the other person but is still willing to give them the space and consideration required for them to live a life separate from them as well as a life within the context of the relationship. I would avoid a needy person like the plague...but would be kind enough to point them in the direction of help.

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "How you'd know if the girl has low self-esteem vs a high sex drive vs lack of respect for her body vs any other issue.?"

 

I guess you can't without an extensive interview with the girl. My answer was specifically relating to the very simple question asked above about neediness. I did not mean to get into a long disertation about all the possiblities other than neediness.

 

I suppose in a broad sense, neediness could include the need for sex.

 

I don't know what's with me this morning but I'm so confused about the posts I think I'm going back to sleep. Two of them above, I couldn't even comprehend at all. Maybe I should see a neurologist.