sean001 Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 A couple of years ago I came across some website that listed a bunch of "game" rules for getting your ex back. Actually, it worked! There were quite a few suggestions, all in a list, but all I remember from it was that it said never to return calls, act as if nothing is wrong, and a few other "game" type strategies that got the ex's passion boiling! It wasn't really a sound, spiritual method... but it was effective. I can't find that same website again, does anyone here know what "rules" I'm talking about and where I can find that #$*(*&(# list again??? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 why play games.. You should know if they want you back or not Link to post Share on other sites
angel0912 Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 The whole don't play games thing....what exactly is NC- if you are using it to get over the person, thats great, but if you are using it because you think not talking to them will bring them back (which sometimes it will) that is just as much of a game as anything else.... And about the whole NC thing- you are doing it to make them miss you...but, if you don't hear from them, you assume they have moved on...and therefore you don't want them.....how does that not work in reverse- i.e. they think you moved on and aren't going to try for you....never figured that one out- just curious if there are any staunch NC'ers out there who would like to explain Link to post Share on other sites
witabix Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 I agree, don't play games. I feel it cheapens your own spirit. Act in a fashion that makes you happy though, when you are happy you are far more attractive to other people, to the original poster, why in Jiminy Cricket would you want an ex back? It didn't work last the time(s), whats different. I agree with the NC rule, not as a strategy in a "game" but as a method for moving on. I don't linger on with contact, its gone, over, finito. We don't need each other in our lives, end of story. My heart is not a battleground, I will not have it trodden over by anyone playing "games" with it, and I show the same respect to the hearts of others. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 the best way to get your ex back is to move on with your life and date other people and totally ignore the ex. Once the ex finds out you have moved on they will want you even more. Women love to gossip so take advantage of this fact. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 the best way to get your ex back is to move on with your life and date other people and totally ignore the ex. Word. That is so true. I think the reason why is because they see you again as you were at the beginning of their own relationship with you and they again see what attracted them, not what caused them to want to leave. It especially stings them to see someone else getting it. So, they fight to get it back. That is, of course if the ex has any feelings left at all. If not then no trick in the world will bring them back and they will move on with their lives as completely as you do. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 That is, of course if the ex has any feelings left at all. If not then no trick in the world will bring them back and they will move on with their lives as completely as you do. I think that's the single most important thing you have to remember. If they don't have any feelings left for you, no amount of NC will make a difference. That is why NC is a great thing. You will heal faster and if they want to come back, it puts you in a better position as you'll be much stronger and wiser having learned from the first experience. Some people, and I'm just guessing here, who want their ex's back desperately right now may not feel the same after they've had enough time on NC and realize their ex wasn't all they were cracked up to be. Link to post Share on other sites
J dub Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 >NC- ...if you are using it because you think not talking to them will bring them back (which sometimes it will) that is just as much of a game as anything else.... Its never a good idea to have the method in mind that by utilizing NC principles you can manuever your way back into someone's heart. The point of NC is to move on and if youre (not you but anyone reading this) is using it as a tool for punishment or tricking your ex, stop wasting your time right now. >you are doing it to make them miss you... No, youre doing it to move on...sometimes they end up missing you, sometimes not. >but, if you don't hear from them, you assume they have moved on When they broke up with you would be a good time to assume theyve moved on, technically speaking. >how does that not work in reverse- i.e. they think you moved on and aren't going to try for you If someone loves another enough, they'll do whatever it takes to get them back (assuming they were the one who made the mistake and left to begin with). If they see youre not calling and thats enough for them to decide to forget trying to get you back, they dont love you enough for it to be worth your time anyhow. You dont have to worry about this one because trust me, when they want you back (IF it even happens) there will be no doubt in your mind and nothing will stop them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sean001 Posted December 12, 2005 Author Share Posted December 12, 2005 Alright so it seems I stepped into a big debate -- I just wanted to know the website where "the rules" are located. I found them once before and thought it interesting. I figured around here somebody must have come across them besides me. I'm not necessarily planning on using them, but they do provide clues to relationship psychology. But apparently nobody knows where they are. Thanks anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted December 12, 2005 Share Posted December 12, 2005 Alright so it seems I stepped into a big debate -- I just wanted to know the website where "the rules" are located. I found them once before and thought it interesting. I figured around here somebody must have come across them besides me. I'm not necessarily planning on using them, but they do provide clues to relationship psychology. But apparently nobody knows where they are. Thanks anyway. Blaise Harris has a book on how to get your lover back but the premise is that you lost them because you didn't show them you loved them. "Loving your lover back to you" is the basic jist. But again, if your ex left you because their feelings changed and they are dating someone else, nothing you can do or say will get them to come back to you. It's completely out of your hands. The best thing for you to do is go NC and put the pieces of your life back together. You may never get her back (chances are you won't) but by going NC you'll heal faster and find the right person for you sooner rather than later. By not letting go you are delaying the healing process. Link to post Share on other sites
Natalie05 Posted December 13, 2005 Share Posted December 13, 2005 All ex's resurface after you've decided it's officially over and you've moved on with your life. Never fails. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted December 13, 2005 Share Posted December 13, 2005 All ex's resurface after you've decided it's officially over and you've moved on with your life. Never fails. Clarification. They may resurface, but not always to get back together. Mine wanted a favor. The next time, I won't answer her call. Link to post Share on other sites
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