looking for some advice

[emotionallytired]

I think that I am being verbally and emotionally abused but I am very confused. Lately my boyfriend's temper has been pretty bad. He has been breaking things and punching walls when we fight lately. He has been calling me names (which he has never done before) and getting in my face bad. The other night we started fighting and he got nose to nose with me and screamed at me while holding our 9 month old son. Our son was crying because he was scared to death. I told him to look at our son, he was scaring him, but he wouldn't he kept screaming at me. I cannot get the look of my sons face out of my mind. He makes me feel that all of our arguments are all my fault. That he is going through so much this last year and I do not care. I have done everything I can to help him. He is always saying how bad his life is. He has even been talking about suicide in the last month. He told me one night that if I didn't quit with my attitude than I would be wiping his brains off the wall. I cannot stand the fighting anymore. I don't have the energy for it anymore. I feel like he has been getting more hurtful in the things that he says,but if I say something back to him, than it is all about what I said. It is like he has forgotten what he said to me in the first place. I am mainly concerned for my son. I dont want him to grow up seeing this especially if it is going to get worse. That is my other concern, if I stick around, will it get worse? I am scared to leave him because he has already threatened that I could not take our son with me. He also makes me feel like I am all he has. Everyone else has abandonded him. It makes me feel really guilty. Sorry so long, but I could really use some advice. Thank you in advance.

[helena abadi]

good heavens, you posted this over a month ago and no-one replied. the good souls at LS abandoned you.

 

firstly, abuse is NEVER ok. you also sound intimidated by his threats. your first priority is for your son. it is your primary duty to protect him, and this guy's behaviour is a threat to his security, because he is abusing you.

 

if your son witnesses this abuse, it is damaging him emotionally. he is in a toxic environment.

 

the man's cry of abandonment are very real. judging by his behaviour, it's no wonder! he may have been abandoned as a child at crucial times. however, that is HIS problem. it's not yours. and don't make it yours.

 

get help from any source you can. enlist friends and family for support, if that is possible. today. if you fear he may harm you or your child, seek protective assistance immediately.