Author Vekoma Posted March 25, 2024 Author Share Posted March 25, 2024 45 minutes ago, stillafool said: I imagine you know by now to never get romantically involved with men you work with because when the break up happens it becomes a s*** show. Never again! I work in a building of around 4000 people so it’s common unfortunately. It could have been handled so much better (particularly on his part) I’m proud of how I’ve handled it when I’ve been there…..it’s all been more when I’ve come home that things unravelled. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Acacia98 Posted March 26, 2024 Share Posted March 26, 2024 (edited) On 3/23/2024 at 12:02 PM, Vekoma said: Yep he was always one of those who said ‘all his exes are mad’ - I should have seen that as a huge red flag to be honest but was in love with him. (...) Despite him initiating all the ‘future’ talk when we were together when he broke up with me he said ‘somethings missing and he now wants to find a wife and a mother’ (...) It sounds very petty of me but is a small comfort to realise he’s probably not dealing with all of this quite as well as he made out when he seemingly chucked me out of our home out of nowhere and didn’t seem upset whatsoever. He’s spiralling. It’s really sad. He’s thrown someone away who adored him and who everyone said was good for him. That was definitely a red flag. 🙂 --- Sometimes it happens that people initiate future talk because they're trying to convince themselves that a relationship is right for them. Problem is, when they finally admit to themselves that it's not working for them, their partners get blindsided. --- You know what? Let's go with that interpretation of things: Perhaps you were good for him. And perhaps he regrets ending things. But (and this is what you really should be focusing on) was he good for you? If, objectively speaking, he's not the right person for you, then his breaking up with you was a good thing. I only wish he had been more compassionate about how he did it. But that's not something you can change. On 3/23/2024 at 8:14 PM, stillafool said: It would behoove you not to listen to people who bring news back to you about his activities. It keeps him on your mind and isn't helping you to move on with your life. I agree that he's single now and if he wants to go out and get drunk and hit on young girls that's his business. The people talking about him don't know what he's thinking and are just guessing. If he was grieving about the break up and wanted you back he's had plenty of time to show you and ask you back. Instead, he can't even stand to be in the same room with you. That would be all I need to stay as far away from him as possible and move on with my life. Are you dating other people yet? I agree with this. OP, ask your friends to stop bringing you updates about him. I really wish you could take time off from that environment. If you could, that would give you some room to heal. On 3/23/2024 at 8:37 PM, ExpatInItaly said: The more you write, the more I think he is dating someone else at your workplace and doesn't want her to see him around you. Or at the very least, he is interested in a colleague and doesn't want to give the impression that he's still friendly with you. OP prepare yourself for this possibility and the likelihood that he's eventually going to be weird about it and rub it in your face. If it is possible to distance yourself even more from your ex, this is the time to do it. Edited March 26, 2024 by Acacia98 Link to post Share on other sites
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