Why am I crying even when the film is bad, bad, bad?

[loony]

Ok, this is a somewhat weird question. A couple of days ago I went to the movies to see a film, but unfortunately they had mixed up the times and were not showing this film at this time. So, my friend and I we chose something else for which we wouldn't have to wait too long. The only film that started at the same time as the other one was "Just like heaven". It's not really the kind of film that I think is worth a visit to the movies, it's ok, but really nothing special.

 

So, I'm sitting in the movies, watching this film that I don't find worth to be recommended to anybody and my eyes, ahem, get moist at certain scenes. Why???? Rationally I was aware that the plot was lame and predictable, the actors were not going to win an Oscar for their performance, and this film will be forgotten in a couple of weeks, but why do I always become so emotional and sentimental at certain scenes? I even have problems with cartoons and animated films... Personally I find it annoying to become so emotional about nothing, because I know it's not real and I find it awful that tears are dripping from my eyes at the sight of two miserable actors declaring their cheesy love for each other! Is this a hint that I'm emotionally unstable (not that I would be too surprised about this) or are there any other explanations?

 

Crying is something I don't like doing when people are around, even family members, it just embarrasses me. And crying in the movies reminds me of the drama queens in my class, the girls who would use tears to get something and who were just silly... Oh man, I don't want to be like them... When I was a kid I think I was also a bit more sentimental than usual, but it became worse when I got older.

[slubberdegullion]

Maybe you're not crying because of the film. Maybe you're crying because you realized you just wasted a fistful of green on something that's so lame!

[SmoochieFace]

Why do you find it *bad* to cry? Did you learn at an earlier time in your life that it is *bad* or *wrong* to cry, perhaps?

[loony]

Maybe you're not crying because of the film. Maybe you're crying because you realized you just wasted a fistful of green on something that's so lame!

Man, lame answer... Try harder next time.

[slubberdegullion]

Man, lame answer... Try harder next time.

ach... well, all my creativity got used up on the christmas poem post... sorry!

[Art_Critic]

Loony.. you sound shocked that you have emotions and feelings..

I'm shocked as well..

 

 

I have alway's felt that those scenes we cry at tug at some aspect of an experience we had during our childhood..

[loony]

Loony.. you sound shocked that you have emotions and feelings..

I'm shocked as well..

 

 

I have alway's felt that those scenes we cry at tug at some aspect of an experience we had during our childhood..

I'm just irritated that I become emotional at crappy scenes with crappy dialogues and crappy actors. And if you have ever got moist eyes during an animated film you would know what I'm talking about.

[JS17]

I'm just irritated that I become emotional at crappy scenes with crappy dialogues and crappy actors. And if you have ever got moist eyes during an animated film you would know what I'm talking about.

For a long time the only two movies I ever cried at were Project X and The Lion King. Nowadays I cry at just about everything. I get irritated about it too.

[FWIW]

Just be grateful that your emotions work! It's normal and it shows you're human - that's what we tell our daughter when she sobs in the sad bits.

 

It's powerfull stuff these days, it's engineered to get you 'there', what with all the surround-sound music playing with your heartstrings too!

 

On the other hand, maybe the specific on-screen scenario is reminding you of something you feel is missing from your life? Your subconcious is telling you to sort out something that's lacking?

[loony]

When I say, my eyes get moist, it's actually an understatement. Usually there is a little bit more water flowing. Argh. And I have to sit there and try to concentrate on other things of the film so that it won't get totally out of control.

[loony]

On the other hand, maybe the specific on-screen scenario is reminding you of something you feel is missing from your life? Your subconcious is telling you to sort out something that's lacking?

I can't remember specifically what causes me to cry, but I think whenever there are strong emotions for whatever reasons I get sentimental, too.

[Outcast]

Rationally I was aware that the plot was lame and predictable, the actors were not going to win an Oscar for their performance, and this film will be forgotten in a couple of weeks, but why do I always become so emotional and sentimental at certain scenes?

 

Because your emotional brain evolved before your rational one and almost always takes precedence. If you note your reactions to almost anything, it'll be the emotions that start the ball rolling - then brain engages. This happens because emotions are tied to instinct so if something scary happens, they can get you to run away or attack to save yourself.

 

It's illogical to expect rationality to operate first - the brain just isn't constructed that way.

 

Is this a hint that I'm emotionally unstable (not that I would be too surprised about this) or are there any other explanations?

 

Not in the least. I cry at the drop of a hat. I cry at ads, parades, movies, cartoons, music, and you name it. And I'm as sane as they come No, but seriously, it's not abnormal or wierd.

 

Crying is something I don't like doing when people are around, even family members, it just embarrasses me.

 

It shouldn't. You shouldn't be ashamed of being human. Are you not watching the media? Even grown men have realized that tears are not a crime - and thank heavens for it.

 

And crying in the movies reminds me of the drama queens in my class, the girls who would use tears to get something and who were just silly

 

There are some folks who turn on the spigots for effect, but if yours is a genuine reaction, then there's nothing to scorn.

 

... Oh man, I don't want to be like them...

 

You're not faking it, right? So then you're not like the people you assumed they were.

 

And if you have ever got moist eyes during an animated film you would know what I'm talking about.

 

There are movies I still haven't seen because I know they'll be hard on me. I haven't watched Schindler's List and have even avoided Lion King. If you're empathic and feel others' pain easily, the flip side is that you'll also be emotional. It's not horrible unless you burst into tears at business meetings or if you do it so often you can't function.

 

Quit judging yourself - your anger is unjustified because you can't make your brain work any differently.

[SmoochieFace]

It shouldn't. You shouldn't be ashamed of being human. Are you not watching the media? Even grown men have realized that tears are not a crime - and thank heavens for it.

 

At the risk of being *bashed* by some here I will say that, yes, I am a grown man and I am not above shedding tears either. Certain things *get* to me and I cannot control that.

 

Certain films will bring out the more emotional side of me - and, yes, Schindler's List is one of them - and other things as well such as cruelty to animals and children. That one in particular not only gets me emotional it also makes me angry.

 

I am a member of a domestic rabbit rescue society and I hear stories of abuse and cruelty that are absolutely horrendous. As an individual who loves animals it would be impossible for me to fight my emotions when I hear such things.

[loony]

Because your emotional brain evolved before your rational one and almost always takes precedence. If you note your reactions to almost anything, it'll be the emotions that start the ball rolling - then brain engages. This happens because emotions are tied to instinct so if something scary happens, they can get you to run away or attack to save yourself.

 

It's illogical to expect rationality to operate first - the brain just isn't constructed that way.

But how come I can assess the quality of this film so objectively, give it a bad rating and still be touched by it enough to cry? How can I rationally know that the film, the scene is not worth it to cry and still do it?

 

Not in the least. I cry at the drop of a hat. I cry at ads, parades, movies, cartoons, music, and you name it. And I'm as sane as they come

Are you sure?

 

No, but seriously, it's not abnormal or wierd.

Oh my god, I caught you with a spelling mistake! That doesn't happen so often.

 

It shouldn't. You shouldn't be ashamed of being human. Are you not watching the media? Even grown men have realized that tears are not a crime - and thank heavens for it.

It is the banality of the things that cause me to cry which makes me uncomfortable.

[slubberdegullion]

Even grown men have realized that tears are not a crime

Guess I must have misplaced that memo. Howcum I'm always the last to know this stuff?

 

jeez...

[Outcast]

But how come I can assess the quality of this film so objectively, give it a bad rating and still be touched by it enough to cry? How can I rationally know that the film, the scene is not worth it to cry and still do it?

 

Because rationality is not linked to bare emotion. And it's being real snobbish to get your panties in a twist because it's not Shakespeare that's making you sad. A sad story is a sad story. Life isn't Shakespeare and we're not programmed to only relate to 'quality' sadness.

 

Oh my god, I caught you with a spelling mistake! That doesn't happen so often.

 

Merry Christmas

It is the banality of the things that cause me to cry which makes me uncomfortable.

 

Well, there's no such thing as a qualitative measure of sadness or happiness. People who like to think themselves 'above' other folk might wish to think such a thing exists but we're not wired that way.

[lindya]

Because rationality is not linked to bare emotion. And it's being real snobbish to get your panties in a twist because it's not Shakespeare that's making you sad. A sad story is a sad story. Life isn't Shakespeare and we're not programmed to only relate to 'quality' sadness.

 

It's an interesting topic. There are certain musical chords that are almost bound to elicit a particular emotional reaction. Popular composers like Andrew Lloyd Webber and whatsisname who wrote the theme tune to Titanic, Braveheart etc make lots of use of those chords. ALW, in addition, constantly borrows from classical music (compare "Memories" to La Bolero, for instance). The right sound-track can certainly boost scenes of pathos in any film.

 

An expert could probably examine that music from a very technical point of view, be highly critical of it and leave us feeling that anyone who liked it is dimwitted beyond repair. I say, the theme tune to Titanic always stirs wistful, bitter-sweet emotions in me. I'm reacting, as the composer intended, to a particular combination of chords....and if it feels good, I'm not going to fight it just because Celine Dion is uncool.

[loony]

When I think about it, I also get really sentimental when listening to some pop songs or oldies. It puts me in a romantic mood.

 

I think I'm worried about my emotions, because it seem so easy trigger them with simple things. I sometimes really think my emotions have too much power over me and I need to put a curb on them or they will go ramapage. I used to constantly have crushes on people till I learned to distance myself a bit more.

[Outcast]

Unless it's interfering with your living normally, it's not a bad thing. If you think some of it is hormonal, check out treatments for PMS. If you seem to get quite depressed and then way happy by turns, you'd want to check into bipolar 2, but I really don't think that's an issue in your case. And unless you have a painful or bad past that you haven't dealt with, there's probably nothing subconscious to worry about.