Dumbass Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Well, for those of you who don't know the story, here's the link:http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t77063/ Yesterday, I didn't hear from her at all, so at about 11pm, I sent a silly text message to her phone...Just a funny holiday greeting, that's all.... Happy Big Baby Jeebus Day. Un beso. And I got NO response! I don't understand why I am being treated like a horrible evil monster...I mean, to ignore a holiday greeting? Seems a bit strong...We didn't say we were going "NC", and she even had been the last to contact me, by way of messenger, with that whole "initiate contact, then be avoidant and standoffish" thing she did 4 days ago.... I don't understand why her other exes, who have totally screwed her over in really selfish, uncool ways, get forgiven. They don't get erased from her blog...They get to strand her ass 4 hours from home, and then they get to sleep with her.... But with me? I just got a little uncomfortable with her relationship with this boy-toy guy, voice my feelings in a manture, non-attacking way, and suddenly, I am Hannibal Lechter... It sure sucks to play by the "one strike and you lose the game" rule... Link to post Share on other sites
Lonestar Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 She's not worth it then. Seems to me that she didn't have much respect for you because you were too nice. Some girls are like that. Texting her was a mistake, but it will do no harm if you stop all contact now. Following up on why she didn't respond to the text will only make you look like... well, a dumbass Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 It sure sucks to play by the "one strike and you lose the game" rule... Knowing when to cut your losses is half the battle.. Some people don't work on the 3 strikes your out policy.. You have to be mature enough to recognize that this is one of those times. It's life ... She isn't worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
wendel1 Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 I sent a simple 'merry christmas text' to the ex also, it was one of many I sent on xmas day to friends and family etc..We broke up in Sept and i've been on NC for two months (she did phone me a week ago mind you) I'm not with anyone, but I feel I have moved on somewhat..I havent had any reply, and I didn't really expect any really. I do still miss her tho. I did tell myself the 'what if she doesnt reply?' type scenario, and basically all it is a f***cing merry xmas txt. I wouldn't get too agitated. All you said was ' Merry Christmas' nothing over the top, and now I'm back to NC. As soon as I sent the text i deleted her number again from my phone. In hindsight, i guess I shouldn't have sent it...but its Xmas day after all. Just dont send one New Years Eve! Dont beat yourself up over it..... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dumbass Posted December 26, 2005 Author Share Posted December 26, 2005 Alright, point taken, Lonestar (by the way, you still owe Pizza the Hut a million spacebucks)... But I won't make ANY more contact....I'm a dumbass, not a stupid-ass.... I wish i could understand why these other guys get forgiven after doing really uncool things, and i get so harshly treated just for getting a tad insecure in the face of my chick wrestling round with a dude who's horny for her, and then wanting to sleep at his place.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Dumbass Posted December 26, 2005 Author Share Posted December 26, 2005 Hey- Hope I didn't offend ya, Lonestar, seeing that we've not spoken at all before, and here I am making Spaceballs references at ya.... I know it's not the healthiest coping mechanism, but I am self-medicating today, if you catch my driff, and am feeling a bit cheeky, I spose....hungry, too....mmmm pizza.... Link to post Share on other sites
Lonestar Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Hey- Hope I didn't offend ya, Lonestar, seeing that we've not spoken at all before, and here I am making Spaceballs references at ya.... No offense taken... Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 I wish i could understand why these other guys get forgiven after doing really uncool things, and i get so harshly treated She's doing you a favor. She's implementing NC with you to allow you to move on. She's sending a clear message: "I don't want to be with you right now." As harsh as that sounds it's the absolute truth. When you accept that and move on and stick with NC you'll start feeling better. And I suspect much fewer men are forgiven than not. You're in the majority, my friend. just for getting a tad insecure in the face of my chick wrestling round with a dude who's horny for her, and then wanting to sleep at his place.... Do you know what a boundary is? I remember your story and you let this chick not only cross your boundaries but stomp all over them. No woman wants to be with a man without a backbone. And before you say anything I was in the same position as you. The time or two I put my foot down she came running back to me. I needed to stick to my guns, be a man and be willing to lose her at the risk of keeping my self respect and dignity. Forget this chick and learn a valuable lesson. Don't be a jerk, be a good man with boundaries. There is a book out there called No More Mr Nice Guy, I think you should read it. Link to post Share on other sites
pippen_2k Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Well from a different perspective, Ive been doing no contact since about May, and I got my 1st text message from her since then. Just a meaningless 3 liner wishing me a merry xmas.... After this long id never initiate contact, cause I definatley no where I stand. I dont even know why she bothered sending me one.... You guys are still pretty early in the breakup phase, so avoid initiating any contact with them... Your better off wishing a good friend a merry xmas, not some ruthless ex who broke your heart. Link to post Share on other sites
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