My bf's female friend told him he should not have bought my Xmas gift

[Juliet]

My boyfriend and I have had some problems in the past and he shares our problems with a female friend. On Christmas he purchased me a necklace that was quite pricey. She did not approve and asked why he spent so much money on me when he does not know where the relationship is going. He told he she said that! We have had some problems but he said he knew what he wanted now. I know he confides in her on everything so since he told me that I have the feeling he does not know what he wants anymore again. What business is it of hers what he spends on me anyway? He wants me to be friends with her but I always feel I come second to her and with comments like that how can I be her friend?

[EnigmaXOXO]

What business is it of hers what he spends on me anyway?

 

It isn't any of her business until he makes it her business. And while I can understand how uncomfortable you feel regarding your boyfriend's jealous friend, the problem child in your relationship is your boyfriend.

 

What the h*ll is he doing carrying gossip back and forth between you two girls?

 

It's almost as if he's instigating the hard feelings between the two of you on purpose. Maybe having you ladies jealous over him makes him feel all BIG and important.

 

So highschool.

 

He wants me to be friends with her but I always feel I come second to her and with comments like that how can I be her friend?

 

I'm more curious, given this guy's juvenile behavior, how you could stomach being his friend?

 

How old is he?

[JayKay]

This is incredibly inappropriate.

 

He should NOT be telling this female friend what he spent on you. She has NO RIGHT to judge what he should be spending or not spending.

 

Her comments are uncalled for and he should have put her in her place and said, "Excuse me, you are talking about the woman I love. Shut your pie hole"

 

 

He needs to grow a spine and tell this woman off. Or stop being her friend. It's very disrespectful to you.

[JadeStar]

I agree with the others. And being that this other girl has been part of the problem in your relationship before, I have to wonder why it is you continue to stay with someone who has no intentions of dropping her as a friend? Theres nothing wrong with having friends of the opposite sex so please understand that. However your b/f seems to be the main instigator of things between you and her. He is telling her your and his business, and its not any of her business what he gets you. Shes now upset over what he got, because she wants him more than a friend, he knows this and thats why he is causing friction. He confides in her a little to much which is obvioulsy not good.

 

 

 

 

Jade

[Wintersbloom]

Hiya~ I don't feel comfortable with my bf being in a relationship with another woman. I have tried this many times over the many years, telling myself that men and woman can be "just friends", I"m liberated....Only to discover a famous therapist is right. A Man and a Woman can not be "just Friends", one or both of them will be thinking about becoming intimate with each other. No two people can be such a close relationship, without there being some kind of resentment toward the "other person" ...meaning you. No relationship can survive a triangle, if he is not cheating with her physically, he is cheating emotionally and sharing intimate thoughts..even those about you..with another woman. Spells Trouble. Relationships with other couples are great...otherwise, you should be the one woman in his life, the one he comes to when he has a problem or just wants to laugh about something silly. Nobody else.

[sparticuss]

It's her business if, and only if, you are using him up to bleed him dry , for expensive gifts, which he cant afford.

Thats when it is her business, his familys business, and the business of any friends of his, male or female, who care about him.

 

Likewise, if my sister, or any other female friend, is dating somebody, with a record of somehthing like wife bashing, then its my business to check it out and to warn her.

When my sister had gotten engaged some stray guy , who had the hots for her, tried to break up the engagement by starting rumours that her fiance had been having affairs with a couple of unattached women. I made these roumours my business by dating these unattched women for long enough to find the truth. Nice dates they were too and , simply by dating them, I was able quash the rumours.

 

She doesnt' approve of expensive gifts when she doens't know where the relaitonship is going. Good question.

Perhaps you'd care to tell us all where the relationship IS going.

If its something permanant, with you chippping your fair share into the mortgage repayments then sudddenly the price of a necklace becomes peanuts. But if this relatinship is over on the day he cant afford expensive tickets to a concert that you had your heartset on then you arent worth the price of a necklace.