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How Long Do You Wait to Date?


johan

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But women heal me, and I see no reason to wait to heal. I don't heal with men. I just compete and laugh and do stupid stuff that distracts me.

 

You and I are alot alike, Johan.:)

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Brittanyjean06

Well we are all different here! if women are the ones who heal you, than do what you think will help you heal! Who knows the right way to heal any way? on your own? People always tell me to go hang out with other guys!

 

so if thats what makes you happy, and heals you than go for it!

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Until I realize there is no chance of getting back with the ex. Once my hope is gone and the pain is lessened I am ready to pursue another. I would not worry about what the ex thinks or others as it is your decision and your life.

 

I think i'm going to be the same as this. I mean since breaking up with the ex 6 months ago i have fooled around on holiday with 2 guys. But that was just fun and ok. Then i met a guy who fell in love with me, i told myself i loved him too. I care for him loads but when my ex broke NC Xmas Eve i realised i'm just not ready to date this man. So we're jst friends now. So i tried, buti'm not ready just yet. Now me and my ex are on speaking terms i don't think i'll even think about dateing til i'm 100% sure he wont have me back. Cause i am a fool when it comes to him :( There is no set ime you just have to do what's right for you. Good Luck. :)

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Brittanyjean06

Yeah some people think there ready! because its exciting to think about start dating- but if your still in love with someone else, its probaly not so good of an idea-

 

if me and my ex were on talking terms( its been almost 6 months)- that would screw me up- but its like i kind of want him to- yet i see all my friends talking to their ex's and how it just doesn't do any good

 

If your the type of person who can heal quicker with someone else- well there is your chance to find out if you need to depend on someone else, to heal-

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Brittany hun, trust me you don't want to be on speaking terms with your ex. No no. I thought i did and everything was honkey dorey (for him) until last night when i mentioned our relatinship and what he had thrown away, then bam everything wsasn't so cushty lol, he was happy to do the small talk s***, the "how are you's?" "what are you up to?" but not to talk about anything serious, anything from the past. But honesty what is the point in the small talk!? Acting like nothing happened? I've been taking back notches now and just feel horrible, contact with the ex isn't worth it! I wish he had never text me a "merry xmas" Last night i said my goodbyes (again :rolleyes: ) and told him i'm not talking to him nomore. Oh he'll be back i am sure of it, back acting like we're the best of buddies or something :rolleyes: Because he doesn't think i', serous. NC is the best thing for ya :)

 

Jade x

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Johan, sorry but I skipped a good bit of the thread.

 

To answer the question, I think it depends on what you want and what kind of person you are. If you're the kind of person who needs company around on a Saturday night then you'll probably go right for another date. The problem is, that's not really a good time to get into a relationship.

 

If you can wait, do so. Give yourself time to process what has happened so you can accept your new partner on her own terms. To some extent, she will be a rebound no matter when you date her, because you will be comparing her even if your trying not to.

 

Each person processes things differently. Some can get into a relationship quickly; others (like me) can't. And sorry, but I don't know if there's an exact time line. For me it was about 8 months before I even started dating again, though I started to feel like dating after about four months - just didn't have much of an opportunity. So maybe the average is 3-6 months before your first series of dates? Just be aware that you may go through a girl or two before you find a keeper.

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