Sadness over loss of friend

[mortensorchid]

I was with a fan travel group for a few years.  I met this guy Russ through it, he was going to host the 2007 fan meeting in his home state and wanted to pick my brain on ideas.  What was supposed to be a one time business call turned I to a weekly Sunday night talk for years and years.  We were best buddies we shared everything and anything.

Then he got a crazy girlfriend who interfered with anyone and everything around him.  She drove him to drink and he went to jail for 9 months for a DUI.  I stood by him.  He got out and she preceeded to drive wages between him and everyone else.  He had me in his phone under a man's name and one day I picked up and it was her shrieking at me.  His kids didn't talk to him for years, any and every friend was pushed away.  We would talk sporadically through the years.  He'd call or text and I would answer it.  He said he was loving with her and her three kids and he'd gained 75lbs and he'd be crying saying he didn't have the energy to raise another family.  Then she'd do something horrible again and I wouldn't hear from him for years.

The last time we talked was in May of 2021.  He called again and we talked for just a bit.  He said he had broken up with her again and she was gone now (yeah right).  He said I was the one for him after all.  I said no I am not the one for you.  I felt like we had both changed so much there was nothing left. 

He died a few months ago. I was thinking about him today and remembering that I couldn't wait to tell him when something good happens.  And he's not here anymore.  You have to remind yourself of that when you forget - "(name) isn't here anymore, he/she is dead".  Closure can and does happen in some ways to things but you just miss that person not being there.  

[hajk]

@mortensorchid I'm so sorry for your loss.  Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feeling.  Your friend sounded like a good person.  May the good memories bring you some comfort during this difficult time.