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My bf and his ex are bothering me BAD


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Gebidozo
32 minutes ago, QueenA said:

If I find out he’s interested beyond apologizing to her then I will leave 

Exactly, if he is just saying sorry I don’t see anything criminal there, but if there is any hint of flirting and romance it’s definitely not acceptable.

 

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QueenA
11 minutes ago, Gebidozo said:

Exactly, if he is just saying sorry I don’t see anything criminal there, but if there is any hint of flirting and romance it’s definitely not acceptable.

 

Well my problem is he unblocked her in other social media platforms after the fact. Second it was both saying they were sorry for the past. The past is him leaving her for me lol.  

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How are you able to know what they tell each other?

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QueenA
4 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

How are you able to know what they tell each other?

lol because I’m a good investigator. No he told me some things and then some other stuff I know his passcode to his phone 

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QueenA
22 minutes ago, Gaeta said:

How are you able to know what they tell each other?

He also told me most because he was trying to be honest with me  

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smackie9

make note...cheaters use burner phones.

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QueenA
1 hour ago, smackie9 said:

make note...cheaters use burner phones.

Dude he does not have a burner phone lol

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basil67
5 hours ago, QueenA said:

lol because I’m a good investigator. No he told me some things and then some other stuff I know his passcode to his phone 

If you're at the point of spying on him, it's already over

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QueenA
1 hour ago, basil67 said:

If you're at the point of spying on him, it's already over

I always do that 

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stillafool
37 minutes ago, QueenA said:

I always do that 

Then it's over.  When you don't trust a partner and have to snoop on them, you don't have a relationship.

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Gebidozo
2 hours ago, QueenA said:

I always do that 

Are you serious?

If you’re checking his private messages and spying on him, then it means there is no trust between you two.

Why are you still together, then?

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QueenA
21 hours ago, Gebidozo said:

Are you serious?

If you’re checking his private messages and spying on him, then it means there is no trust between you two.

Why are you still together, then?

I’m only doing it now because he only responds to her when he’s not around me. For example he told me she text him that she felt like a weight was lifted off her shoulders since they both apologized but he didn’t respond but I feel he will when he’s not around me

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stillafool
2 minutes ago, QueenA said:

I’m only doing it now because he only responds to her when he’s not around me. For example he told me she text him that she felt like a weight was lifted off her shoulders since they both apologized but he didn’t respond but I feel he will when he’s not around me

You don't trust him and know that he's now made up with her and they are still talking behind your back.  Tell us again why are you still together?

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2 hours ago, QueenA said:

I’m only doing it now because he only responds to her when he’s not around me. For example he told me she text him that she felt like a weight was lifted off her shoulders since they both apologized but he didn’t respond but I feel he will when he’s not around me

That's what happen when a man cheats on his girlfriend to be with us. It will always be in the back of your head 'what if'. I would not live like that. There is no man worth all that worry, anxiety, doubt, constain uncertainty.

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semble
5 hours ago, QueenA said:

I’m only doing it now because he only responds to her when he’s not around me. 

Well there you go. He's clearly saying and probably doing things to her and with her that he knows you will be unhappy about so he's doing it behind your back.

He's loving the attention he's getting from both women who are clamoring for his attention and getting scraps.

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ExpatInItaly

Do you generally make poor choices in dating, OP

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QueenA
5 hours ago, semble said:

Well there you go. He's clearly saying and probably doing things to her and with her that he knows you will be unhappy about so he's doing it behind your back.

He's loving the attention he's getting from both women who are clamoring for his attention and getting scraps.

My whole issue is that the way they talk to each other it seems like romantic tension or something. He shouldn’t even be talking to her. She was a big and I mean huge problem for us. But will he ever forget her with all the history they have? 
When she said she appreciate him apologizing he put a heart. And she put hearts when he said he’s sorry. Like if you’re in love just say that

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basil67
50 minutes ago, QueenA said:

My whole issue is that the way they talk to each other it seems like romantic tension or something. He shouldn’t even be talking to her. She was a big and I mean huge problem for us. But will he ever forget her with all the history they have? 
When she said she appreciate him apologizing he put a heart. And she put hearts when he said he’s sorry. Like if you’re in love just say that

And you want to stay with him because????

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QueenA
24 minutes ago, basil67 said:

And you want to stay with him because????

Because I’m not sure if I’m reading too much into a friendly interaction 

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basil67
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, QueenA said:

My whole issue is that the way they talk to each other it seems like romantic tension or something. He shouldn’t even be talking to her. She was a big and I mean huge problem for us. But will he ever forget her with all the history they have? 
When she said she appreciate him apologizing he put a heart. And she put hearts when he said he’s sorry. Like if you’re in love just say that

Of course she was a big problem for you both - you were part of a love triangle with her.  You're very naive if you think she'd walk away from the two of you graciously.  She will undoubtedly be doing all she can to get him back.  I'm sad that she doesn't see him for the cheater he is and leave him in her rearview mirror.  And sad that you won't do it either.   He's given neither of you any reason at all to trust him

 

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QueenA
8 minutes ago, basil67 said:

Of course she was a big problem for you both - you were part of a love triangle with her.  You're very naive if you think she'd walk away from the two of you graciously.  She will undoubtedly be doing all she can to get him back.  I'm sad that she doesn't see him for the cheater he is and leave him in her rearview mirror.  And sad that you won't do it either.   He's given neither of you any reason at all to trust him

 

I understand she probably wants him but does he want HER. 

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12 minutes ago, QueenA said:

I understand she probably wants him but does he want HER. 

He unblocked her everywhere, he apologized, he speaks to her in your back,  he sends her hearts emoji....what you think?

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basil67
Posted (edited)
15 minutes ago, QueenA said:

I understand she probably wants him but does he want HER. 

If you understand she probably wants him, why are you complaining about her being a big problem?   Surely her actions make sense to you

All you can do is look at his actions and decide if they are acceptable.  And look at yourself reading his messages and decide if this is the person you wish to be.  But one thing is clear, and that is that he's not over her

 

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QueenA
23 minutes ago, basil67 said:

If you understand she probably wants him, why are you complaining about her being a big problem?   Surely her actions make sense to you

All you can do is look at his actions and decide if they are acceptable.  And look at yourself reading his messages and decide if this is the person you wish to be.  But one thing is clear, and that is that he's not over her

 

Because they don’t talk everyday for some reason that comforts me…. Idk ehy

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basil67
4 minutes ago, QueenA said:

Because they don’t talk everyday for some reason that comforts me…. Idk ehy

And yet you're still spying in his phone.  This is not what a healthy relationship looks like.

Have you ever had a healthy relationship to compare this with?   

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