do attractive women get friendzoned? What could this behaviour have been?

[stillafool]

7 hours ago, PeachPalm1 said:

And no I don’t, but I would like to be able to feel what I did toward him, with someone else. Dating him made me feel light and happy and I had no anxiety. And that’s what I hope tobhave next time. I don’t want to comment on thread anymore. This is the last thing 

The goal should be for you to feel light, happy and with no anxiety without a man in your life.  Then you will be ready for a relationship.  Don't look to a man to save you.  You are the only person who can give you closure.  Any questions that you may have for him the answers will just lead to more questions the way you are doing here, going around and around.

I see you're still responding.

Edited May 28 by stillafool

[Gebidozo]

51 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said:

I do understand that he said he didn’t feel romantic, it’s just hard for me to understand the why.

This question makes no sense at all.

You can’t ask why a person did not feel romantic about you. He just didn’t. Period. End of story.

It’s like asking why I don’t like soy milk. I just don’t. If soy milk were you, it would pester me obsessively about why I don’t like it, till I’d begin to hate it. It would start a 20-page thread full of repetitive, mantra-like posts stating that it’s actually a great milk, but something must be wrong with it if I don’t like it.

You’re too self-centered and I’m beginning to think that deep down you really feel that men must l fall in love with you.

 

[PeachPalm1]

11 minutes ago, Gebidozo said:

This question makes no sense at all.

You can’t ask why a person did not feel romantic about you. He just didn’t. Period. End of story.

It’s like asking why I don’t like soy milk. I just don’t. If soy milk were you, it would pester me obsessively about why I don’t like it, till I’d begin to hate it. It would start a 20-page thread full of repetitive, mantra-like posts stating that it’s actually a great milk, but something must be wrong with it if I don’t like it.

You’re too self-centered and I’m beginning to think that deep down you really feel that men must l fall in love with you.

 

I’m not self centred. Just a bit hurt from my ex boyfriend who said he dated me only as he was lonely. And then meeting this guy a year later. I suppose I only go on lots of dates if I like a guy. The way he acted on dates was like he really wanted me. Hence my confusion. 

[NuevoYorko]

1 hour ago, PeachPalm1 said:

he seemed so into me in person so I thought he was just a bad texter, and a busy guy.

???  He cut your dates short.  He was uncomfortable with you sexually, and he hurried you out of the house in mornings if you'd spent the night.  None of those qualify as signals that a person is "so into" you.  Sorry.   

1 hour ago, PeachPalm1 said:

 

I do understand that he said he didn’t feel romantic, it’s just hard for me to understand the why. Especially as I didn’t get the closure I needed

This has been clarified for you at great length. The "soy milk" analogy above expresses it perfectly.   Not everybody is a fit for everybody else.  Is this news for you? 

And the guy owes you NOTHING.  "Closure" is not required, especially when you've had  minimal  interaction.  It certainly is not his responsibility to provide that for you.  Telling you he's not feeling romantic is enough.

 When people are dating,  the whole point is to LEARN if they are compatible and attractive enough to each other (TWO WAY STREET) to keep going forward.  The majority of times, the answer is NO.   This goes for everyone including people who are super gorgeous or dripping with wealth.  

1 hour ago, PeachPalm1 said:

and especially as it felt like a kick in the teeth after my ex before me told me he never fell in love with me.

You're all over the map about your "ex."  

Are you aware that you've said more than one time on this thread that you have NEVER had a guy interested in having  a relationship with you?

Then you say you had 2 boyfriends.

This ex you've brought up numerous times.  Recently you wrote that he never took you on a single date.

I'm wondering how you and he identified yourselves as being a couple if you didn't go out.

You've stated that you are several different ages throughout the thread also.  When my daughter was in middle school (about 11 years old) she and her friends were always talking about who was "going out" with who.  We used to crack up.  Because they were 11, and if we, their parents, were not driving them someplace, nobody was going out.  

It kind of sounds like that situation.  Except you say you're in your late 20's and you have had sexual relationships.  So I do hope you're out of the pre-teen and teenage years, however old you are really.

[basil67]

12 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said:

I’m not self centred. Just a bit hurt from my ex boyfriend who said he dated me only as he was lonely. And then meeting this guy a year later. I suppose I only go on lots of dates if I like a guy. The way he acted on dates was like he really wanted me. Hence my confusion. 

It was established earlier that been using the term “ex” to describe men who weren’t actually boyfriends.  Was this guy your actual boyfriend or one of the guys you dated for a bit and it didn’t work out?

[PeachPalm1]

20 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said:

???  He cut your dates short.  He was uncomfortable with you sexually, and he hurried you out of the house in mornings if you'd spent the night.  None of those qualify as signals that a person is "so into" you.  Sorry.   

This has been clarified for you at great length. The "soy milk" analogy above expresses it perfectly.   Not everybody is a fit for everybody else.  Is this news for you? 

And the guy owes you NOTHING.  "Closure" is not required, especially when you've had  minimal  interaction.  It certainly is not his responsibility to provide that for you.  Telling you he's not feeling romantic is enough.

 When people are dating,  the whole point is to LEARN if they are compatible and attractive enough to each other (TWO WAY STREET) to keep going forward.  The majority of times, the answer is NO.   This goes for everyone including people who are super gorgeous or dripping with wealth.  

You're all over the map about your "ex."  

Are you aware that you've said more than one time on this thread that you have NEVER had a guy interested in having  a relationship with you?

Then you say you had 2 boyfriends.

This ex you've brought up numerous times.  Recently you wrote that he never took you on a single date.

I'm wondering how you and he identified yourselves as being a couple if you didn't go out.

You've stated that you are several different ages throughout the thread also.  When my daughter was in middle school (about 11 years old) she and her friends were always talking about who was "going out" with who.  We used to crack up.  Because they were 11, and if we, their parents, were not driving them someplace, nobody was going out.  

It kind of sounds like that situation.  Except you say you're in your late 20's and you have had sexual relationships.  So I do hope you're out of the pre-teen and teenage years, however old you are really.

I’m 28.

and with my ex, I was the one that planned all the dates. My ex woukd ask to see me and as he was new in my town said he didn’t know what was around, so I booked escape rooms, days out, trips etc 

 

with the last guy I thought he was into me on dates as he couldn’t take his hands of me, making out with me and literally moaning with pleasure as he kissed me, asking me lots of deep questions , kissing my forehead, telling me ‘omg you are so so so hot!’… 

Edited May 29 by PeachPalm1

[basil67]

15 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said:

I’m 28.

and with my ex, I was the one that planned all the dates. My ex woukd ask to see me and as he was new in my town said he didn’t know what was around, so I booked escape rooms, days out, trips etc 

That's BS dating!  Anyone who's capable of using a computer can use Google to search "what's on this weekend" in a town or city.   Don't ever settle for someone so lazy that you have to plan all the dates.  

 

15 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said:

with the last guy I thought he was into me on dates as he couldn’t take his hands of me, making out with me and literally moaning with pleasure as he kissed me, asking me lots of deep questions , kissing my forehead, telling me ‘omg you are so so so hot!’… 

Did he ever take you on dates?   If not, then it was nothing more than a hookup situation

I do understand how confusing it is.   I was in my teens when I figured out that pretty much any guy would be up for fooling around, but the guys who are actually interested in more would arrange dates and generally make time for me outside the house/backseat of the car.    How about you make a rule to not have sex with guys who aren't doing nice things with you outside the house? 

[stillafool]

2 hours ago, PeachPalm1 said:

I do understand that he said he didn’t feel romantic, it’s just hard for me to understand the why

This is entitlement.  As if he has no right to not feel romantic towards you.   He doesn't owe you closure nor can he give that to you.  You were not his girlfriend but someone he dated and had sex with. 

[stillafool]

26 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said:

I’m 28.

You were 27 last week. Did you have a birthday?