So me and her are talking....

[Dookie_Dont]

So I'm talking to a girl and my boss is also hitting on her. He knows that I like her, and yet he says he won't do anything and hes doing it from what I can tell. We've had some miscommunications at work, because well its supposed to be a secret but pretty much that went to hell cause we ran into so many people that we work with when we are together. So its not a secret anymore....

 

But she never calls back! When she says she is going to, she dosen't. She said its a bad habit. It got on my nerves ya know, I was missing her.

 

Told her I want her to call me back, and that it makes me sad when she dosen't. I told her it gets on my nerves when the boss is doing this. And she kind of smiled. I said "well maybe you like the fact I'm getting worked up over this" she said "no I hate it too, but I've never seen you upset about something"

 

She liked it.....hehe anyway.

 

So I told her she needs to tonight, because I'm not going to call her back until well she calls me. Fair enough right? And she said "I don't believe that" and I was like "if you want to keep talking to me you'll call"

 

The reason for this is for the past few days, I'ved called and she said she would return the call but never would. But the 2nd time there was no answer, its like she dosen't want to talk to me. It sucks.

 

But before you go on about how I'm a CRAZY guy or something because I'm not getting a returned call. She told me right from the start that she is forgetful and usually just dosen't call because she dosen't know what to talk about. To me it sounded like an excuse.

 

What do you all think?

[Admiral Thrawn]

So I'm talking to a girl and my boss is also hitting on her. He knows that I like her, and yet he says he won't do anything and hes doing it from what I can tell. We've had some miscommunications at work, because well its supposed to be a secret but pretty much that went to hell cause we ran into so many people that we work with when we are together. So its not a secret anymore....

 

But she never calls back! When she says she is going to, she dosen't. She said its a bad habit. It got on my nerves ya know, I was missing her.

 

Told her I want her to call me back, and that it makes me sad when she dosen't. I told her it gets on my nerves when the boss is doing this. And she kind of smiled. I said "well maybe you like the fact I'm getting worked up over this" she said "no I hate it too, but I've never seen you upset about something"

 

She liked it.....hehe anyway.

 

So I told her she needs to tonight, because I'm not going to call her back until well she calls me. Fair enough right? And she said "I don't believe that" and I was like "if you want to keep talking to me you'll call"

 

The reason for this is for the past few days, I'ved called and she said she would return the call but never would. But the 2nd time there was no answer, its like she dosen't want to talk to me. It sucks.

 

But before you go on about how I'm a CRAZY guy or something because I'm not getting a returned call. She told me right from the start that she is forgetful and usually just dosen't call because she dosen't know what to talk about. To me it sounded like an excuse.

 

What do you all think?

 

 

You are playing this all wrong.

 

This is what you do next time you see her, AND YOU LISTEN WELL.

 

You tell her, that you were busy with something lately, and tell her you are sorry that you can not find the time lately to call her, but you'll try again (to call her), if you 'find more time in your busy schedule'. And still dont call her, got that?

 

If her boss hits on her, instead of being upset, start lauging at her, and saying, if the boss goes out with her, you wish him luck, because you cant stand her for five minutes. You tell her, better the boss is bored because she cant carry a conversation, because your time is more important than his. If she come around, and start's complaining about your new attitude problem --- just tell her to sit down (make sure she is in kissing distance), when she starts talking, tell her to shut up and then KISS HER ON HER LIPS with your hands in her hair --- go for the kill one time, one shot. Got it? Once you get that kiss going, then you've got her.

 

Keep on playing like you are 'disinterested' -- something has come over you, something 'wonderful' has happened in your life - you are no longer interested in her - let her wonder in her mind what it is, let her think its another hot girl somewhere or something.

[Dookie_Dont]

I wasn't really upset, I was telling her my concerns. She thought it was cute how I was concerned. I think upset kind of made it a misconception.

 

Does her saying "I'm not one to call back" seem like an excuse to screw with me.

 

But thats like playing games isn't it admiral?

[Admiral Thrawn]

I wasn't really upset, I was telling her my concerns. She thought it was cute how I was concerned. I think upset kind of made it a misconception.

 

Does her saying "I'm not one to call back" seem like an excuse to screw with me.

 

But thats like playing games isn't it admiral?

 

She thought it was 'cute' that you were concerned. But the reality is, she has you, so you are no longer presenting a challenge to her. If a woman's idea of romance is pursuing a guy that doesn't really want them, then you've defeated her purpose, and she wont have any interest in you. The idea is to create an attraction by not being as available as are you currently are to her.

She can just snap her fingures at you like a dog, and feel confident you'll do whatever she wants in order to get her to call you, date you, or whatever...

 

No she is not screwing with you, she is just playing her part. She is in her rightful place to say that "I"m not one to call back", because, again, she is not factinated or intrigued by you. She can get any other guy, why you?

Fact it, you are losing this game with her. Time to try a different strategy or concede defeat as it doesn't seem to be appearing to go nowhere.

[clandestinidad]

I agree with the main concept of Admiral's post. Quit calling her. I dont like talking to someone at work AND multiple times on the phone NEARLY EVERY DAY!!! (unless I've been dating the person and we're high on a cloud) and I'm pretty sure other girls feel that way too

 

But really, stop calling her! Its irritating

 

(you could do a search here for "like a puppy" or something like that and get more opinions about that)

[Dookie_Dont]

I didn't call her, I told her I wasn't going to. I told her if she wants to talk to me, she needs to learn how to use a phone.

[clandestinidad]

well....lanuage like THAT probably wont get you anywhere either!!! I hope you didnt say that exactly!!

[Dookie_Dont]

Haha I guess being more specific does help right?

 

It was along the lines of a joke. We both had a very good laugh over the whole topic. And I mean thats just how we interact, seems that we enjoy our time together. I told her she never calls back, she said I'm not one to do the calling because I never know what to say. I told her we could surely find something to talk about.

 

I was like I haven't got to talk to you in forever, I called a few times no answer and such. And when I did get through she never called back. So it was really a playful conversation over whats going on now.

 

I guess maybe you had to be there, I think your all taking me too seriously for what it was worth. Or maybe I ran it into the ground.

[clandestinidad]

hahaha....no, we get it better now I think!

 

I still agree with you that you shouldnt call her....good idea

[Lucasarts]

sounds similar to a topic i posted a few weeks ago concerning a girl in school.

 

i would just give up and ignore her, cause she's obviously not paying attention to your "demands."

 

dont talk to her or anything, until she starts a convo with you, she should at least *try on her part to keep the communications going.

[Dookie_Dont]

See I mean I had already called her like once for the past 2 days. And only one time I got through and she never called back when she said she would. So today me fed up with like I don't know "non talking attitude" was like. You have to call me to talk.

 

So yay! Glad were on the same page.

 

But she never called. hmmm.. how about that. But hells no, I'm not calling her.

[Dookie_Dont]

At work today she acted all weird, didn't talk to me much. Told me she didn't call cause she didn't know if that guy would spend the night or something. (I had a friend come over we played guitar for a few hours). I was like "eh", and she rarely looked at me and never stopped to talk.

 

Makes me sad man. Think I should give up? Or is it possible to distance yourself too much where it scares her off. Or is it that I did it in?

[clandestinidad]

If she goes, she wasnt really into you the first place. You kept doing all the pursuing, she didnt respond to it. You put her in the position of choosing to pursue a little, and apparently she doesnt really want to.

 

Unfortunately, if she was interested she wouldnt have been so unresponsive.

 

Although, she might just feel a little funky about it right now. Act normal around her, joking or whatever. Dont avoid her. Certainly dont seek her out though. If she comes around, great. If not, she wasnt really interested anyway.

 

And its much better to have this situation early on, rather than months later after a lot of effort like some other posters are having to deal with!!!

[Dookie_Dont]

We hung out a few times, the and we had a great time. The last time we hung out (actually hung out) while I was getting out of the car she grabbed me and was wanting a kiss. I played the tease and told her it'll be better if we wait. And shes like "nope" and I was like "why should we :P" she was like "why not"

 

So I kissed her.

 

So its not like she hasn't been playing dead or anything ya know? Hell she really forcefully grabbed me and pulled me back into the car. It was hot and weird at the same time.

 

So she was acting interested. But this is at work, and its a no-no to be doing this so maybe thats why shes not talking much.

 

I mean this is the history of me and her that I'm working with and then all of a sudden she dosen't call. Eh. man. See this is why it hurts partly.

[Moai]

Hey bro, she doesn't dig you. It's just that simple. It doesn't matter how weel you perceive things are going in person, because she obviously knows you want her, and that makes her feel good. That would make anyone feel good.

 

If she was into you, she would answer when you called, or at the very least return your calls. But she doesn't. If a girl you were into called you, you'd answer, right? It really is that simple.

 

And no offense, but you REALLY blew it by bringing it up. You basically told her in mo uncertain terms that she can treat you however she wants and you'll be there, waiting and willing to do whatever she wants.

 

What you should have done is call once, and if she doesn't call back or take your call YOU NEVER CALL HER AGAIN. Don't mention it, treat her lke a gentleman when you see her, and leave it at that. If she eventually asks why you don't call, ask her why she doesn't call you. You don't have the kind of free time to be calling someone who couldn't care less about you, right?

 

You are past that now. You have no chance at all with her, and if you keep talking about it and keep begging her to call you all that will happen is she will lose more and more respect for you (not that she really has any right now) until eventually you'll have no respect for yourself anymore. Cut your losses and bail. She can't be that cool, or she'd return phone calls, and not use a lame excuse like, "It's a bad habit of mine, hee hee". Puhleeeeze.

 

She sounds like a harpy. Stop wasting your time on her and focus on someone who deserves you.

[Dookie_Dont]

on the contrary I told her I'm not going to let her do this. If she wants me she can call, otherwise I'm gone. She didn't think that would happen.

 

I was out with my friends earlier, and will probably leave again.

 

Some girl called while I was away, parents didn't get a name though. So who knows, either way its a chick calling. Wee.

[Dookie_Dont]

Guys she never called. Lost cause? Or mind games?

 

Please anybody who can help? Maybe you think I played right into it. All I want to do now is just listen to alot of AFI for some reason

[Lucasarts]

um re-read all the posts in this thread and this time stop lying to yourself that she likes you

 

get over it kid, this girl isnt into you in that sort of way. she's not playing games with you really, she's simply just not listening to what you're demanding. go after some other chick who wants your time and company.

[Dookie_Dont]

Yea I see where you are coming from. Most of this threads posts were a misunderstanding of what I was trying to get across. But me trying to get a little control in the situation ya know. Didn't seem to work. So I can see where your coming from Lucas on this.

 

But for some reason I'm not wanting to give up. Whats bad is how I was starting to think of her. When I went with her while she had to go grocery shopping. Thats when we talked about it all. Thats really the last time I talked to her and it was forever ago.

 

Bad thing is, I was really starting to admire her while we were walking around together. I was getting into her thinking it would be an awsome relationship.

 

And now she won't call.

[Lucasarts]

well i'll say it one last time for your sake and you can take it or leave it

 

she isn't into you in that sort of way, its tough when you find a chick that you think can be everything and that you can be her everything, only to realize that she doesn't think of you the same way. It happens with a lot of male/female friendships, guys who are friends with girls talk to each other and one or the other starts really digging the other one. The talks become more intimate sometimes or more frequent as one or the other initiates conversation more. Pretty soon, you think that because he/she is listening and talking to you more, that you think that you two could become a couple. sometimes this works out, sometimes it doesnt, but whatever it may be, w/e happens happens. Life is funny like that you know?

 

when you told her how you felt, she realized how far this friendship had gone and she didnt want it to be interpreted like that. Thats why she isnt answering your calls or your pleas. She's trying to ice you, get you to back off and cool off. She doesn't know of any other better way to let you down.

[Dookie_Dont]

Well shes played off to like me for a long time man. The entire time I've worked there it seems. And just recently had I acted on it. She had told all my friends she had liked me. And the 1st time we had ever spent time together or talked, she explained how she never calls back. Forgetful.

 

I just hate to think that it was all for nothing. And yes it does suck.