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Not what I thought...


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Love is weird. I have worked with this guy for 2 years and then out of the blue he asked me out recently. I hesitated in the beginning, because with the coworker thing. But, whenever I am around him I just feel this sense of peace. I don't have to try to try to impress him. I don't have to work for his attention. I'm just me. I just don't know what it is about this guy. I always thought love would be this big *BANG* of feelings exploding...but, it's not like that at all. It just simple. Wish me luck! :D

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I am 37 yrs old, so nope, I've been in love before. It's early in the relationship so love is probably not the correct word to use yet. This guy sees me 40 hours a week...do you think I try to look hot at work? Hell no. He even drove me home one night after our company christmas party and was my designated driver. He was never really my type before. Never even gave him a second look. But, after he asked me out...I got to looking at him in a whole new light. I think I'm gonna give this "nice guy" a chance. Metaphorically speaking when it comes to guys, I've always chased the waterfalls and of course, I'd fall over the edge everytime. I think I'm gonna stick to a nice smooth running stream for once.

 

My point is..is that I don't think enough nice guys get the attention they deserve.

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of course nice guys dont get enough attention, but thats not their fault really, i think its the women who want someone refreshing and exciting while they are young. my quote about this problem is:

 

"nice guys get married, but dicks get the pussy"

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Well, if you are a young person in the dating scene, then you got plenty of time to be a dick. But, I am pushing 40 yrs old and there could be a big possibility of ending up alone if I don't get my head out of my ass and grow up!

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haha yeah thats true

 

my quote was about us young guys:

 

the nice ones always seem to finish last in this fast world...its when we grow up some and slow down do we see how we need someone who is genuinely nice and always there for ya to spend the rest of your life with.

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Thanks Lucas. I am really struggling though. This guy already is puttin me on a pedestal and everyone is telling me that he would treat me like a queen. But, for some stupid-idiotic reasoning of my own...I almost feel scared to be put up there. Being happy scares me. A life without turmoil? How would I function?

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The thing that is probably going on is a level of trust that you normally have not had or established in prior relationships. And, you may not have been particularly looking for trust. But, trust is a powerful aphrodisiac. and, it usually happens over time and a wide array of experiences shared with someone.

 

However....now, you knew there had to be a catch didn`t you?:laugh:

A person`s professional existence is different from their private self. Beware You still do not know this person. You only know one dimension of them. And if we believe eharmony, there are 29 dimensions:laugh:....only joking here!

 

But, that is a good point. There is more than one dimension to a person. Professionally, they may be impecable. But, they may be lacking in the relationship department.

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Trust? What's that? I've had my heart stomped on numerous times in my life. So, now, I am *trying* to be attracted to the nice guys. But, normally I am attracted to the guys that are emotionally-unavailable. I feel comfortable there...but I am trying to change. Least, that's been my relationship cycle for sometime now. I have actually been single for two years now.

 

This new guy asked me out a couple weeks ago, but I am too damn scared to go out with him. When he first asked me, I felt very flattered and special. He makes me feel very special!! But, I can see him getting serious really fast with me and that petrifies me. :sick: It almost seems like this guy is too good for me. I will dissappoint him somehow or push him away unknowingly. I don't want to hurt him, and I don't trust myself not to reject him.

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hmm fear? i wonder why that is?

 

he is unlike the other guys you have dated, so the trust issue about your heart being stomped on wouldnt be a problem...

your fear of not being good enough for his standards? well you won't know until you've gone out with guy...if he's a nice guy then obviously he knows well and he did ask you out did he not? obviously he sees something in you he likes.

 

i think you're more afraid of hurting yourself, by becoming too emotionally attached to someone with feelings and understanding.

 

i would just go with it, i mean a new experience is always a rewarding one in one way or another. You learn the goods and bads of the type of person you date, and who knows? the goods may outweigh the bads more often then not.

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