NyTransplant Posted July 11 Share Posted July 11 Situation started when I was suspended from receiving my Social Security Disability benefits last 11/2023. Bills started piling up, took many personal loans from friends, was being forced to go back to work (impossible, due to not being able to lift anything over 25 lbs….) by my spouse, and conflict began. Fast forward to today, when our family sold our home on the opposite coast of the US (I live in NJ…). Proceeds will be coming to me from the home sale, and my spouse is now dictating what we should do with the money… My disability payments are resuming, am receiving a lump sum for the 6 months of back payments to me. Also have a major class action lawsuit to be settled in a couple of months too. Major annoyance is when we attend social dance parties and birthdays, she chooses to dance with other men, claiming I just don’t know how, and I’m “disabled”, when my condition is back to normal now. It’s humiliating, and don’t know if it’s her “culture” (she was Filipino born…) to ignore your spouse at parties, and claims all the other women there are “married” too, but chose not to include their spouses to the party. My mind is always in a cloudy state, and am considering reaching out to others for friendship and hopefully be able to discuss what’s going on, in a platonic setting. Help!!! Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 11 Share Posted July 11 3 hours ago, NyTransplant said: am considering reaching out to others for friendship and hopefully be able to discuss what’s going on, in a platonic setting. What does this mean, exactly? Are you going to try to contact other women? Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 11 Share Posted July 11 4 hours ago, NyTransplant said: she chooses to dance with other men, claiming I just don’t know how, and I’m “disabled”, when my condition is back to normal now. Are you proactive in asking her to dance with you? Link to post Share on other sites
tzorno Posted July 11 Share Posted July 11 Have you told her that it bothers you when she dances with other men and you would rather she didn't and you don't care about the excuses? If so, does she continue? Also, as stated above, what do you mean when you say you are ready to reach out to others? If it means you are considering reaching out to other women for emotional or even physical support, your relationship is in serious trouble. Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted July 12 Share Posted July 12 So, you say your wife "forced" you to go back to work. Can you elaborate on that a little more? Also, is the sold property part hers, or is it yours? By that I don't mean is she entitled to half your assets, I mean did she contribute to the purchase of that property? If it's not hers then I would set her straight on that point. As far as the dancing stuff goes, it really depends on what type of social gatherings you're at. If it's with many other Filipinos, (as far as I've ever observed), they will often home in on their own countrymen and next thing you know they're speaking Tagalog and Western partners may be on the outer, and they'll dance, (and sing Karaoke), with anyone and everyone. However, it's rude not to ask your partner if they want to dance before dancing with someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
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