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Friendship fallout


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Angel29

I made a friend in 6th form in the year 2000. A few years later I did not speak to her for a year as she was quite horrible to me one night. She contacted me out the blue after seeing me in the street one night. She promised it would not happen again. Over the years she would be sarcastic or have digs. 

I did not see her from about 2015-2018 as I got involved with my hiking friends. In 2019 she asked to meet up. She was a lot nicer and I thought she had changed. She was still with her abusive boyfriend after 10 years and she said it was not going anywhere a bit like me and my ex. I thought why would you not learn from my mistakes. I blocked her boyfriend ages before that as he was abusive to some friends at a house party the once and he did it another time on my birthday so we left the pub and left them there.

Another time in 2019 we met up and I was out of work for a few months and was very ill health. I was frightened and did not know what it was. She said you are lazy not working. I felt awful. I had always worked and she was judging me for being out of work. I never did that to her when she was signing on years before and she had anxiety and depression. (I have been back at work for 4 years now since then).

A few weeks later she sent me a birthday card and Christmas card and then I blocked her. I read the cards and threw them in the bin straight away. I was so ill back then felt so betrayed and friend would judge and not support me.

I had a nosy at Instagram the other day and she had put 2023 was the worst year of her life. I had to drive down her road today as she still lives with her parents and saw the house is for sale. 

It makes me sad as we did have good times at times and why did she have to behave like this. I feel like unblocking her but she may never change and her abusive boyfriend is still with her.

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Angel29

I since found out her mom died last year of multiple sclerosis. No wonder 2023 was the worst year of her life.

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basil67

I'm sad that she lost her mom.  But you're doing the right thing keeping her out of your life

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ShyViolet

She sounds like she has a lot of problems and doesn't treat the people in her life very well.  When you have problems with a person time and time again, you should stop coming back for more.  It's time to cut off contact with the person and move on.  Yes it's sad that she had a rough year and she lost her Mom, but still that doesn't change the fact that she was horrible to you and she wasn't a good friend.  There's no reason to continue putting yourself through that.

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