ShyAllie Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Hi, I'm new here, I've been reading through a lot of posts....this board looks awesome, has really given me some tips!!! Here's my delimma....I've had sex, once before....I think it was sex, I'm not sure what you'd call it. This was more like a one night stand. He was all hitting on me, holding my hands, etc. I was at friends party. (I'm 23 now by the way, this happened when I was like 21). I stayed over...he came into the room....I was nervous but wanted it too... So we fooled around and I told him no because he didn't have a condom, but then he kind of found his way in anyway like ten minutes later, and I really wanted it, but I was like no....so that pretty much ended that....so i dont even know if u would call that sex? Anyway, i've never actually been in a relationship, I've only kissed 3 guys, and did a little more than kiss with 1 and had "sex" with the 3rd.... Well, I have this guy friend, and we've gotten to be pretty good friends over hte last year or so. I really really like this guy. I've never really liked anyone before, never like this. I can't get him off my mind, I just get all warm inside thinking about him. I think he likes me, and he's started to act differently than the differently that led me to think he liked me in the first place...so i think something really could come from this soon. One of my problems is that I feel really awkward about a potential relationship change because I've known him and he's my friend. Whereas, the other 3 guys I didn't know. So if something does accrue from this, I'm not sure how to handle say...a frist kiss....what do i do after?!!?! What do i say? I know i'll just end up looking like a beet red silly and wont be able to look him in the eyes. I'm not looking for sex with him right off...but I'm sure it'd come as i know already he's way more experienced than i am.... Any tips on how I can handle this.....I mean, if he brings the subject up (im all for it, but i dont want to rush TOOOO quick) Also, anyone else hwere friends with the SO for like a year before anything intimate developed? How did it feel, was it weird or was it actually more normal? How did the more intimate stuff develop and how did it go afterwards??? Any advice would be great!!! I don't want to look tooo inexperienced!! Link to post Share on other sites
blackjack Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Dont worry about it love. Its perfectly normal fpr people to find themselves in this dilemma. If your feelings are true for this guy, go for it! The sensual experience is enchanced when someone has strong emotional ties with their partner to-be. So my advice is forget about the other guys, worry about strengthenong the relaltionship with your current man. Link to post Share on other sites
blakjak Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Dont worry about it love. We all experience these kind of dilemmas. I belive you should go for it with your current man. Sensual experience is enchanced when you have emotional ties with the partner. Try it and sees if it works. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ShyAllie Posted January 5, 2006 Author Share Posted January 5, 2006 i'm not in a relationship but "friendship" with this guy at the moment. I haven't even kissed him yet. I'm not sure how to handle this at all. I don't want to embarrass myself and we're friends....so I have known him for like a year.....and if we do get together im not even sure what to say or do after except blush and feel awkward . Link to post Share on other sites
SincereOnlineGuy Posted January 5, 2006 Share Posted January 5, 2006 Allie, Your honesty and candor are really nice to read. One thing about being female, if things progress toward romance and eventually intimacy, you can just let him lead and be reasonably sure that his interest will continue. I do think you would be doing yourself a favor by purchasing condoms one day very soon. (drive three towns away if you simply have to, but in this day and age it is very acceptable for a woman in her 20's to buy and have condoms) Otherwise, I suspect that you will feel much better for having a lengthy friendship evolve into romance than you would have if entering a relationship that began with a one-night stand. When you get to the depths of sexual interaction, there aren't many elements more important than how comfortable the woman is inside her mind. I don't know if this friendship will evolve toward romance, but if it does, you shouldn't fear the step-by-step process. Link to post Share on other sites
Unreg11111111111 Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 I do think you would be doing yourself a favor by purchasing condoms one day very soon. (drive three towns away if you simply have to, but in this day and age it is very acceptable for a woman in her 20's to buy and have condoms) Amazon don't just sell books you know Link to post Share on other sites
love is blind Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 I would not worry too much about the physical. After getting over the inital kiss, it will be very natural. There is not a 'right' or wrong way to kiss, so do not stress and just relax and you will be fine. I know the idea of sex seems very awkward, but when you come to doing it, you will find that things go naturally. Especcially if you both know and trust each other. Take things slow, everything come naturally. IF you worry too much, it will not be so natural. Enjoy each other's company, enjoy spending time together and getting to know each other. As for dating a friend, my boyfriend now was a good friend of mine for over 6 years. It did seem a little strange when I first realised that I liked him, and he liked me. But when I kissed him for the first time, things felt right and we were both good enough friends to make a joke of the awkward moments. When I first saw him naked, it was a little strange (I had seen him in swimmers previously, but then I was seeing him in a totally different light). But there was nothing better than having sex and waking up the next morning next to a good friend. We are still together 3 years later. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
SuperFantastico Posted January 16, 2006 Share Posted January 16, 2006 Allies a pretty name just like amanda. Anyways onto your question, for me personally I like forplay a heck of alot more than the actual intercourse itself. I mean fingers and mouths can do ALOT Since you really do like this guy, i'd take it slow and just kiss and maybe heavy petting(i belive thats touching with clothes on...someone might correct me if i'm wrong) I'd wait like 10 or 15 dates before you give it all up(although its a long time, but waiting makes it WAY more worth it) and will give the actual relationship part time to grow and mature. Link to post Share on other sites
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