Author Sailynn Posted January 3, 2006 Author Share Posted January 3, 2006 I should have stated it better, but the reason I did those things, was for my own well being. I did not engage in these activities to "win" her back. The relationship we have now, is not based on anything from the past, but who we are now. The new people we are. Naturally, I still carry an affection for her, but I told her that I had to look at her as a new person. After our big meeting, I treated her just like I treated any female dating prospect. More or less, my position is that I'm in the position of being the buyer. So, I ask, what is it about a particular woman that would convince me to buy her, so to speak. So while we may have become BF - GF again, all is not at the checkout counter yet. Link to post Share on other sites
chocolate_boy Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 Superb advice RR....if he does not remain a challenge and play hard-to-get then she will eventual get bored again and run off. He has the upper hand right now and once he loses that the relationship will fall apart again. Here are some things he can do to remain a challenge: - see her once or twice per week at most - keep his own interests and seperate friends - keep chasing after other women - don't smother her or get jelous - stay attentive yet aloof and somewhat indifferent - say "I love you" maybe once or twice per year at special occasions - mentally make yourself the prize, not her - read my guide to keeping women around: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t61606/ No no no no! You have to be 100% open and honest with each other for a proper relationship to work. Ignore all the silly games, that's for high-school kids or wannabe "players", just be open and honest, it's the only way you will find out if you are both right for each other. Relax though cos yeah you do have the "upper hand" so take it at a slow pace and remember to look after yourself and your heart. Good luck dude! Link to post Share on other sites
chocolate_boy Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 well yes, you did get her back....but you must examine HOW you got her back. you did it by doing the above and if you stop doing the above then you'll find in due course of time that she'll lose interest again. she is a woman who wants what she cannot have, and once she relaizes that she has you 110% then you are finished and the train will wreck again. guaranteed! While I certainly agree there are girls like that (notice I say "girls" not "women"), I have dated them before, and they're far too much effort to be playing with, why would you want to be with someone you have to constantly play with in order to keep them interested? If they want to go, let them, chances are they're not all that and you can do better anyway. In my experience it's quite true of girls under the age of 21 but when you get into the age of wanting a loving relationship, then stuff like that goes out of the window, and it's based on love, trust, friendship and respect, those are the relationships that last a life-time. I don't think my grandad is still playing games to stop my nan "losing interest" after 60 years of marriage! Link to post Share on other sites
J dub Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 - read my guide to keeping women around: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t61606/ Oh my....youre from SE Mi? So am I, and I think..based off your "guide", I've dated you before lol:lmao: Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 No no no no! You have to be 100% open and honest with each other for a proper relationship to work. This doesn't have to be dishonest. I certainly recommend honesty and openness. But I do suggest that Sailynn takes it *slowly* with this girl. This is always good advice, but particularly when she has hurt you before. I would also suggest that you maintain a balance between her and the rest of your life. You still need to be maintaining your own friendships and doing your own things. Time apart is as important as time together. And your life should not revolve around her. Not yet, anyhow Link to post Share on other sites
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