Bellabee10 Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 He was showing me photos on his phone and when he clicked out, it showed the Snapchat app. I know typically it is used by a younger crowd. We are both in our 40s and have kids from our previous marriages and our kids use the app to communicate with their friends and to each other. I know my son in particular, always talks with my BF’s son on there. His kids are young teenager and his daughter uses it heavily as well. I’ve never had the app so I don’t know anything g about it other than the negative that I hear, how a lot of people use it to be sneaky, cheat, etc. My BF and I have been together 6 years and he’s never given me the reason to ever think he would do anything like that. Like I said, our kids are friends, we have family get togethers, he treats me very well and I love him tremendously. He mentioned while back about Snapchat, that he’s worried about his kids using it, etc and wanted to know what was going on with it. I don’t recall him ever mentioning he would download it. So I just saw the app this weekend and it was bothering me, so the following day, I asked him if he has Snapchat because of the kids. He didn’t look worried or “caught”, was just a straight look and said “yes, absolutely. I can see their location when they’re not with me and at their mom’s”. He also mentioned that his daughter’s boyfriend is on his Snapchat as well and said he wants it just in case. Daughter only started dating this boy a few weeks ago and is her first boyfriend so my boyfriend said he added him. He even assured me he doesn’t use it as it is for a young crowd and any grown adult using it is questionable. He said that he told his daughter he wasn’t meaning to embarrass her and it was being used by him just as a precaution, etc. I told him iPhones have a feature where they can share a location, and showed him how I can see my son’s location in real time. He said he wasn’t familiar with that. He just switched to an iPhone from an Android. I’d like to believe this is a valid reason but wanted to get some thoughts on whether or not this would still sound suspicious. Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 I’m confused… What exactly are you suspicious of? So he has that app, for whatever reason. It’s just an app for chatting, isn’t it? It’s not like he installed Tinder and has an active account on it and is flirting with the women using it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 It makes perfect sense to download an app that your kids are using to see how it works. How can we begin to look after our kids when we don't know about the stuff they are using? Given he's never given you a reason to mistrust him, why are you mistrusting him over this? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bellabee10 Posted September 16 Author Share Posted September 16 15 minutes ago, Gebidozo said: I’m confused… What exactly are you suspicious of? So he has that app, for whatever reason. It’s just an app for chatting, isn’t it? It’s not like he installed Tinder and has an active account on it and is flirting with the women using it. I think it’s because of what Snapchat has been known for, with people using it so everything that’s read or seen is erased with no trace of anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 Just now, Bellabee10 said: I think it’s because of what Snapchat has been known for, with people using it so everything that’s read or seen is erased with no trace of anything. So what? You can do that with other chatting apps as well. I still don’t see any connection whatsoever with anything that might arouse suspicions. If he bought a baseball bat, would you suspect that he might kill someone with it, because it has been known for its occasional use as a weapon? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 Wow. You're really reaching. I can't help but think that you must be quite unhappy in this relationship. This is not the first time you've gone rather far afield because of unfounded suspicions or feelings of neglect. Link to post Share on other sites
MsJayne Posted September 16 Share Posted September 16 He's a responsible parent keeping an eye on what his kids are engaging in. If only all parents watched as closely . Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 On 9/16/2024 at 3:54 AM, Bellabee10 said: I think it’s because of what Snapchat has been known for, with people using it so everything that’s read or seen is erased with no trace of anything You don't trust this man, really. If you did, this wouldn't even register with you as something to be suspicious of. Why are you questioning his reason? My guess is thay you were already feeling insecure in the relationship for some reason so you're seeing this through the same filter. So, what's really going on between you? Have you felt hm drifting away recently? Are you feeling unsure about him for other reasons? Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted September 17 Share Posted September 17 7 hours ago, ExpatInItaly said: So, what's really going on between you? Have you felt hm drifting away recently? Are you feeling unsure about him for other reasons? Read her post history. There are several threads about things her bf has done that have triggered her insecurities. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 16 hours ago, introverted1 said: Read her post history. There are several threads about things her bf has done that have triggered her insecurities. All the more reason to stop lying to herself that this relationship is working, and all the more reason to get out. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 Why do you not trust your partner’s response? Why are you polling people on the internet to know whether you should trust your boyfriend? If you don’t trust the man, you need to consider whether this is the relationship for you. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 On 9/15/2024 at 8:54 PM, Bellabee10 said: I think it’s because of what Snapchat has been known for, with people using it so everything that’s read or seen is erased with no trace of anything. It appeals to some people for that reason, yes. If your boyfriend is trustworthy, it shouldn’t matter what platform he is using online. The issue is not the app, the issues here is that you don’t trust your boyfriend. If he has given you good reason not to trust him, then I would reconsider the relationship. You shouldn’t need to live with this kind of insecurity and conflict in your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jasonblackheart01 Posted September 18 Share Posted September 18 You need to trust your partner. You been together for years, suspicions can lead to unnecessary fights without evidence. If in case he's really been cheating on you, that's on him. He wasted years of trust just for a simple passion which means he is not worth the effort. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Leihla_B Posted September 19 Share Posted September 19 On 9/15/2024 at 9:19 PM, Bellabee10 said: I’d like to believe this is a valid reason but wanted to get some thoughts on whether or not this would still sound suspicious. No, not suspicious, especially given the context. Link to post Share on other sites
Georgia46 Posted September 19 Share Posted September 19 I have Snapchat and just purely use it to take nice photos with filters. it doesn’t mean he is cheating. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted September 19 Share Posted September 19 I'm 60 and I use snapchat to communicate with my gaming friend. Not sure how this app is any different than using FB messenger. His reason sounds legit. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrin Posted September 19 Share Posted September 19 100% legit reason for having Snap. Link to post Share on other sites
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