damnedwench Posted October 5 Share Posted October 5 BF and I are both 29, been together for 5 years, living together for 3. He has strayed a couple of times to say the least. Told me he would cut contact and I found out a couple more times he hadn't, eventually did last I saw. He has Struggled with drugs and alcohol and was working towards remaining sober for the last few months. We've been working on this relationship for the last few months and besides a few hiccups (not infidelity related) we've been getting closer. Today we were going to grab some food and needed to pay the parking meter. Neither of us had enough change so we started to look around the car for fallen change. I found a strip of paper with his handwriting saying (in his native language) "for my extremely attractive friend bra". Friend was in feminine and bra doesn't mean anything in his native language so not referring to woman's undergarments - Looks like an incomplete word. We picked up food and when we got home I told him what I found. I was calm but told him I needed to go inside and lay down. A little while later he came into the room and said he knew that looked pretty bad. He said he couldn't remember where or when that was from. Then tried to tell me it didn't say what it said but I quickly shut him up. We both speak Latin based languages, I took his language in college, I know what the f*** it said and I Google translated just to be sure. I told him to leave me alone because everything he was saying was bullshit and he was making it worst. He later came back and asked if I was still mad. I asked if he had brain damage and if he thought I was that stupid. He then confessed when he went to the coffee shop last week a girl working there asked for his number. Initially he said no but when he went to his car he had second thoughts and wanted to slip it to her, started the note but didn't finish and didn't give it to her. He said the way she complimented him made him feel good about himself. I am struggling to believe him. I'm so beyond upset that he would firstly try to tell me it didn't say that and secondly he would consider giving out his number and not say he has a girlfriend. Hurt is not even a word I can use to describe this, I am bewildered. I was not expecting it in the least. Second guessing my life, my relationship. It brings back the pain of the times he cheated on me. And he went out to drink.... hadn't drank in a good while.... I just needed a vent, I have no one. Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted October 5 Share Posted October 5 Sorry that you’re going through this. Please break up with your BF and cut off all contact with him. This will save you a lot of pain in the future. He is an unrepentant cheater and a liar. He’ll just keep hurting you until the imminent breakup becomes even harder. Link to post Share on other sites
Leihla_B Posted October 5 Share Posted October 5 (edited) Unfortunately, it sounds like this guy never stopped cheating, he just got better at hiding it from you. You can keep pretzelling yourself to try to believe what you wish about this man, but that won't make it true. At what point will you value yourself enough to walk away and invest in finding a future with a partner you can trust? Edited October 5 by Leihla_B Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 7 Share Posted October 7 Don't waste your best years on a cheating liars. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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