Author PeachPalm1 Posted October 13 Author Share Posted October 13 (edited) 3 minutes ago, Alpacalia said: Agree with @BaileyBif he's autistic your experience will be a bit different. Also, sometimes you date someone and then it just doesn't match up- can't force it if it's not there. It still sounds like you're a bit hung up on him despite not dating him for a while. If you don't sort out those feelings it can prevent you from moving on completely and you're welcoming advances for men like gym man who you're not actually in to but because he shows sexual interest in you. Sometimes when your esteem isn't fortified, any attraction will do. No but I’m just trying to give other men a chance. Like my family have been telling me I need to lower my standards just a tad so I don’t remain single forverr. I’m doing just that and dating different people than I usually would. I know, I feel like I will always miss the autistic guy. He texted me recently and said ‘I realise how much I miss you.’ And then he didn’t reply. He has a new girlfriend now even when he texted me that which is super confusing. it takes me time to develop attraction to I am open to it with gym guy. I am demisexual so I need some time to warm up what I’m worried about is how it was there with the autistic guy. Like he would smother me with kisses and cuddles and be like ‘oh I just can’t get enough of you, you make me so happy.’ And then disappeared after the dates. Edited October 13 by PeachPalm1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 13 Share Posted October 13 Approached and asked out daily? Sure, Jan. I'm out. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Sony12 Posted October 13 Share Posted October 13 (edited) 17 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said: Approached and asked out daily? Sure, Jan. I'm out. Yeah this whole story is just getting weird. We are now listening to her go on and on and on and on about a person with autism and she won't stop talking about how the guy had autism. But supposedly she liked him so much that she said he was her type. If there is any truth at all to this story the guy with autism is much better off with someone new than he is with a person like the OP who won't stop talking about the fact he had autism. Edited October 13 by Sony12 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 You keep describing these one or two men by their apparent diagnosis - this is beyond disrespectful. Why did it not occur to you to use a pseudonym? And why even mention autism when it's got little (if any) relevance to the story? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Acacia98 Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 On 10/12/2024 at 10:49 PM, Georgia46 said: Classic clown 🤡 initiating text, you reply and then says nothing. I literally can’t stand people like this. Hahaha. Me too. Now, OP, this is for you: I literally have one person in my life like this ex-date of yours right now. Guess what? I got irritated with the way he was communicating with me (essentially sending me breadcrumbs periodically). I archived our conversation so that if he ever reaches out again, I don't see his message and, therefore, don't respond to it. It's a pretty effective way of closing the chapter. I assure you I'm not reminiscing about him. And fortunately, I don't have friends like yours because I imagine they would try to make me feel like I had let the love of my life go. This is what I mean when I say other people have the same experiences as you. They just interpret them differently from you and, therefore, respond differently from you. There's nothing fundamentally wrong with you. You just need to learn to see things for what they really are and to respond accordingly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PeachPalm1 Posted October 14 Author Share Posted October 14 5 hours ago, basil67 said: You keep describing these one or two men by their apparent diagnosis - this is beyond disrespectful. Why did it not occur to you to use a pseudonym? And why even mention autism when it's got little (if any) relevance to the story? A pseudonym for what, sorry? Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 (edited) 15 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said: A pseudonym for what, sorry? His name Edited October 14 by basil67 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PeachPalm1 Posted October 14 Author Share Posted October 14 (edited) 29 minutes ago, basil67 said: His name I didn’t use his name? Where did I use it? I’m worried now I’ve looked through the post and I can’t see names Edited October 14 by PeachPalm1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PeachPalm1 Posted October 14 Author Share Posted October 14 25 minutes ago, basil67 said: His name I’m a little confused, I would never post a name on here Link to post Share on other sites
Author PeachPalm1 Posted October 14 Author Share Posted October 14 2 hours ago, Acacia98 said: Hahaha. Me too. Now, OP, this is for you: I literally have one person in my life like this ex-date of yours right now. Guess what? I got irritated with the way he was communicating with me (essentially sending me breadcrumbs periodically). I archived our conversation so that if he ever reaches out again, I don't see his message and, therefore, don't respond to it. It's a pretty effective way of closing the chapter. I assure you I'm not reminiscing about him. And fortunately, I don't have friends like yours because I imagine they would try to make me feel like I had let the love of my life go. This is what I mean when I say other people have the same experiences as you. They just interpret them differently from you and, therefore, respond differently from you. There's nothing fundamentally wrong with you. You just need to learn to see things for what they really are and to respond accordingly. Another poster said I used his name here but I can’t see it, can you see if I used their names by accident? yeah he does send breadcrumbs like he doesn’t know what he really wants in life or something Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 58 minutes ago, PeachPalm1 said: I’m a little confused, I would never post a name on here You didn't post his name. What you did was repeatedly call him "autistic guy" and this is really rude. So instead of identifying him with a diagnosis, use a pseudonym for his name! His real name may be Henry, but for privacy you call him a different name. Or if you really don't want to use a name of any kind, identify him by how you met him just like you did with the personal trainer. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PeachPalm1 Posted October 14 Author Share Posted October 14 3 minutes ago, basil67 said: You didn't post his name. What you did was repeatedly call him "autistic guy" and this is really rude. So instead of identifying him with a diagnosis, use a pseudonym for his name! His real name may be Henry, but for privacy you call him a different name. Or if you really don't want to use a name of any kind, identify him by how you met him just like you did with the personal trainer. Oh I really didn’t mean to be rude by that. But yes you’re right I should have done that. I’ll remember that for future. Link to post Share on other sites
Justagirl999 Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 On 10/11/2024 at 12:12 PM, PeachPalm1 said: Or if it’s my fault because I didn’t want to sleep with him on the first date. Maybe I should have been more flirty about it. What do you mean if him pulling back was your fault because you didn't want to sleep with him on the first date??? Is that what you want? A guy who would use you for a one night stand? There is no guy that would be genuinely interested in you and pull back because you refused to sleep with him on the first date! The fact that you have standarts and boundaries is a good thing and something to be proud of, not something that should make you feel insecure. If that was the reason he pulled back then he wanted nothing more. Would you feel better if you had slept with him and THEN never hear from him again? I doubt it... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NuevoYorko Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 This thread has followed a path that is verging on the comedic, and I don't really take you seriously anymore, OP. But I will make one point, with regards to the actual title of this thread. Did you "ruin things by not sleeping with him quick enough"? Get this straight: The time to sleep with another person is when YOU feel like it's the right time for YOU. If you jump in bed when you're not feeling it's right in some ridiculous, misguided fantasy that this is how you "lock him down" (which obviously you do not believe, really - since you've slept with at least several, if not numerous men and have yet to have a real relationship) - THAT is how you RUIN things. By not being real and true to yourself and bending your own boundaries to try to manage the behavior of another person. So, the answer to your original question is NO. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 23 hours ago, PeachPalm1 said: No but I’m just trying to give other men a chance. Like my family have been telling me I need to lower my standards just a tad so I don’t remain single forverr. I’m doing just that and dating different people than I usually would. I know, I feel like I will always miss the autistic guy. He texted me recently and said ‘I realise how much I miss you.’ And then he didn’t reply. He has a new girlfriend now even when he texted me that which is super confusing. it takes me time to develop attraction to I am open to it with gym guy. I am demisexual so I need some time to warm up what I’m worried about is how it was there with the autistic guy. Like he would smother me with kisses and cuddles and be like ‘oh I just can’t get enough of you, you make me so happy.’ And then disappeared after the dates. Someone disappearing after dates, having you leave immediatley following being initimate, and certainly someone texting you they miss you while they have a girlfriend is not my idea of someone to boost about. There are certain things you have to pay more attention to while dating that shows that the person is not available. At least, not in the way you need them to be for a romantic relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Sony12 Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 (edited) 36 minutes ago, NuevoYorko said: This thread has followed a path that is verging on the comedic, and I don't really take you seriously anymore, OP. Does this forum monitor people making alternate accounts very much? Because I feel like there have been many different posters who have created threads just like this where their story just gets crazier and crazier and they keep the thread going for days by unveiling all these new layers. Wouldn't surprise me at all if many of these are from the same person who is just using different accounts each time. Edited October 14 by Sony12 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Alpacalia Posted October 14 Share Posted October 14 44 minutes ago, Sony12 said: Does this forum monitor people making alternate accounts very much? It used to. I am not sure about now. Link to post Share on other sites
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