i need some one to talk to..

[totally_deluded]

hi,

i am struggling at the moment because i was physically abused & mentally abused as a child. I know i need help because now it is affecting me & my husband, I am very insecure & i am very defensive. I don't know what is wrong with me, other then i need something to make me better. In the past i have cut my self & harmed my husband by hitting him etc. please some advice would be great.

 

thanks

[midori]

Hi totally deluded,

 

I'm sorry to hear about your problems, which sound quite overwhelming, real, and should not be downplayed. I hope that you can find some helpful sympathy and support from others here who may have experiences that relate in one way or another to yours.

 

However, I must emphasize that these forums cannot in any way substitute for in-person discussions with a trained therapist, marital counselor, or abuse specialist. This forum is not equipped to be a primary source of help for the problems you have mentioned. Any discussions you have here will only be effective and appropriate if they are taking place *in addition to* regular meetings with an accredited professional in real life. If you have not yet established a relationship with a professional who can help you, I urge you to do so.

 

Good luck, and I do hope that some of our members who can relate to what you're going through will respond to your post. But please do bear in mind that LoveShack.org cannot provide the primary assistance you need to work through your problems.

 

Very best wishes,

midori

LoveShack.org Site Director

[JadeStar]

Have you tried counseling in the past for this? If not you might want to seek a counselor that deals with this type of thing. I know that sometimes, when things from childhood are not properly delt with, they will carry over into our adulthood, and relationships. Find a good counselor in your area. Good luck.

 

 

 

 

Jade

[lilmoma1973]

 

I am sorry to hear what you are going through,the best advice i could give you is go and talk with a Marriage Counselor and work on what you went through with you abuse till then you will continue to show abuse towards your h .. What happen to you is very tramatic and this is the only way you know how to deal with it? I am so sorry for your pain and suffer that you are enduring ... You need to work through this or it will be the disaster of your marriage.. I am sure you don't mean to be like this but you don't know how to repress this anger your feeling.. It doesn't make it right but it is understandable.. Still doesn't justify it .. Do you love your spouse? Sometimes when things happen in our childhood it reflects how we are as a person ,we just have to learn to deal with it and get past it.. Please seek some counseling...Good luck and my heart goes out to you..

[blind_otter]

hi,

i am struggling at the moment because i was physically abused & mentally abused as a child. I know i need help because now it is affecting me & my husband, I am very insecure & i am very defensive. I don't know what is wrong with me, other then i need something to make me better. In the past i have cut my self & harmed my husband by hitting him etc. please some advice would be great.

 

thanks

 

Have you tried counseling? Even if you have, you sound like now things have gotten to the point where you may benefit more (if people seek out counseling before they are ready to take in the information, it can sometimes not be so helpful because the client resists the help).

 

Honestly, though, this is the bottom line. You don't "need SOMETHING to make you better" -- the capacity for healthier patterns of living and interacting are within you already. To seek it externally will only result in suffering. You need something internal - the love and acceptance from yourself that you didn't receive from others.