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Sharing a bed with another guy friend and a female friend while in a relationship


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Hi,

Me and my old friends from a previous work place were all out together for a reunion. We were drinking and after the bar all went back to one of the guys house for an after party. It was a mix of guys and girls. All good friends.

During the night I felt tired, went to the bathroom and then decided not to go back down to the rest of the group and went into my guy friends room and went to sleep in his bed on my own. 

The next morning I woke up and my guy friend and my close girl friend were in the bed with me , we were all fully clothed.

The guy friend was sleeping in the middle of us two ( it was his house and his bed).

Nothing happened or any funny business at all as we are all just close friends.

However I was in a relationship at the time and still am with the same boyfriend, my close girl friend was also in a relationship.

Is this considered bad when in a relationship?

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How old are you ?

This is typical of early 20ish night out - too much to drink - falling asleep everywhere. Nothing bad happened, no one had bad intentions, no one drank while drunk. There is nothing to feel bad about. 

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Personally, I’d feel uncomfortable if my SO fell asleep in the same bed with some dude.

I’d be okay if she did that with a gay guy, but not with a straight one. I’d probably get over it, but it’s a bit of a boundary crossing for me.

I think you should tell your BF about that and make sure he’s okay with such stuff in general, in case it will happen again in the future.

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1 hour ago, foxy25 said:

@Gebidozo yes it's a male friend that my boyfriend has already met and gets on with. My female best friend was also in the bed. I went to bed first they joined me. All fully clothed

I understand. You’re asking whether this is considered bad in a relationship, and my answer is that, while I wouldn’t classify it as something outright “bad”, I’d be uncomfortable with that.

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Is your boyfriend giving you a hard time because of it?

You did not tell me your age but l assume you're  around 20 yo. If you were older l'd give you a hard time. I remember my first year in college l lived in a 1 room apartment, no couch, 1 bed. We got snowed-in no one could leave.  Me, my best g'friend and her boyfriend splept fully clothes in 1 bed.  We were still laughing about it years later.

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I guess we're all raised differently. My sister and I both went to schools with lots of parties, we attended lots of parties off campus and we hosted our share of parties, some in our parents' home. We didn't want anyone to drive, so we offered quilts, pillows and sleeping bags, and everyone slept wherever they could lie down. We had 3 to a bed or 2 to twin beds, people all over sofas, chairs and floors. Everyone remained fully clothed or changed to full pajamas, and nobody felt 'guilty' about this.

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