guest5498 Posted January 7, 2006 Share Posted January 7, 2006 I'm getting married later this year to a guy I have known while he was seperated from his first wife. We met at his brothers wedding and didn't hit it off right away, I found him attractive but he didn't seem too interested until about 6 months later or so. Anyway, his brother and wife set up a "blind" with us and them, we have been together ever since. He didn't filed papers for divorce until about a month or so after we started dating. They were seperated for almost 10 months at that point. Well know that I have been with him this many years, I see some things in him that may have led to the divorce. He told me that his ex was very jealous and didn't trust him. Well he has a problem with looking at porn and going to strip clubs. I didn't find all of this out until recently. He had his kids over the holidays and took them back to their home in a near by state and when he did he told me that his cell phone broke and that I would not be able to reach him on his cell, when he called to tell me he was at his parents house. Well I found out that was not the case, he took out the battery from his cell phone on the drive back to drop off his kids. His oldest son told me this, while I was talking to him on the phone the other day. My question is, should I be concerned with this behavior? Maybe his ex had a reason to be acting this way toward him. Now I am doubting if he even loves me, maybe he never had time to heal from his other relationship. He chose to move out of state where his kids and family are and he has a really hard time going back. I don't want to be a rebound or be played a fool in my marriage. Am I over reacting or should I be truly concerned??? Link to post Share on other sites
JayKay Posted January 8, 2006 Share Posted January 8, 2006 The fact that he lied to you about the cell phone concerns me. I don't like being lied to. I don't care how big or small a lie is, I don't like being lied to. People who lie about one thing tend to lie about other things. When I find out about one lie, I wonder how many other lies exist that I don't know about yet? I'd confront him on this issue. If he gets angry or defensive, he may have a real problem with truth and intimacy. Link to post Share on other sites
jmargel Posted January 9, 2006 Share Posted January 9, 2006 The best way to judge a person's future behavior and characteristics is to look at their past behavior. He is already starting what probably led to his divorce with his ex wife. Want to know what really went on? Ask the ex-wife. I'm sure she'll give you insight into him that'll save you years from finding out on your own. Link to post Share on other sites
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