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What to do with the usual blues?


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RandallHare

What do you do when you're sad? How do you channel these negative feelings into something positive?

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Georgia46

What are you sad about? 
 

I have many things I’m sometimes sad about but I reckon feeling your feelings is the only way through… feel then you can start to heal.    

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Could it be that your sadness is appropriate for whatever is going on in your life?

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RandallHare

It just feels ironic how so many people compliment for my looks, which should be a big advantage, plus I'm academically and professionally successful, and I have all the traits of a good husband and father such as being responsible, non-violent, has good financial management skills, hardworking, and honest. Sometimes I feel like it just so happens I live in a small provincial city. Although I get hundreds of matches, there doesn't seem to be enough number of women I'm interested in. Sometimes I'm tempted to relocate to a bigger city but I'm too lazy to even start planning as I'm a bit of a comfort freak and I love the city where I'm living in.

Another reason why I'm sad is my shoulder injury that just doesn't go away. I miss working out and the last I did this was in Mid-October.

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Good looking, smart, successful, hardworking, honest and gets matches from hundreds of women, none of whom are good enough for you. 

Sounds like your dating problems stem from entitlement on your side

Edited by basil67
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Do you think your ego might be running the show and that’s why you’re lonely? 

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2 hours ago, RandallHare said:

Although I get hundreds of matches, there doesn't seem to be enough number of women I'm interested in.

Maybe that’s because you believe you are too good for those women.

A humbler attitude will help you connect with women better.

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RandallHare
3 hours ago, basil67 said:

Good looking, smart, successful, hardworking, honest and gets matches from hundreds of women, none of whom are good enough for you. 

Sounds like your dating problems stem from entitlement on your side

I'm just looking for someone with the same levels. Mum was also a big influence in my choices. I've been around intelligent attractive ladies because I went to competitive schools growing up. It's just that, I wanted someone who was funny back in those days. It was too late when I realized I missed those opportunities. I mean, you know, women explicitly asking me to be their boyfriend. And not just women but attractive and intelligent ladies. I'm dumb.

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RandallHare
55 minutes ago, MsJayne said:

Do you think your ego might be running the show and that’s why you’re lonely? 

Not in the same way that I feel 'entitled.'

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15 minutes ago, RandallHare said:

I'm just looking for someone with the same levels. Mum was also a big influence in my choices. I've been around intelligent attractive ladies because I went to competitive schools growing up. It's just that, I wanted someone who was funny back in those days. It was too late when I realized I missed those opportunities. I mean, you know, women explicitly asking me to be their boyfriend. And not just women but attractive and intelligent ladies. I'm dumb.

Sounds like you missed the boat. You may have to compromise a little on looks or smarts

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RandallHare
1 hour ago, basil67 said:

Sounds like you missed the boat. You may have to compromise a little on looks or smarts

Exactly. 

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RandallHare

I was thinking, maybe I should ask people I know if they know anyone. Tinder seems to be too difficult to find good matches nowadays. There are very few quality women there and it's getting fewer and fewer as the years go by.

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7 hours ago, RandallHare said:

I was thinking, maybe I should ask people I know if they know anyone. Tinder seems to be too difficult to find good matches nowadays. There are very few quality women there and it's getting fewer and fewer as the years go by.

You could....but given how choosy you are, they'd be foolish to get involved because you're likely going to reject all options for not being smart or beautiful enough.  Finding flexibility in who you date is the answer

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