lemonicetea Posted Wednesday at 07:25 PM Share Posted Wednesday at 07:25 PM About a month ago I was talking to a guy on a dating app. Like just basic small talk for a couple of days. Even though he seemed like a nice guy and everything, nothing about his profile stood out to me and I didn’t really find him that attractive (not trying to be shallow). At the time I was trying to operate under the theory that you should engage with everybody who doesn’t raise any red flags. Even if they aren’t your type, who knows, they may surprise you. He eventually stopped responding to me, and it didn’t really bother me because I wasn’t really that into him. Today I got a message from him saying he apologizes for letting our conversation fizzle out but he’s been busy with work. He said that he still wants to talk with me, finds me beautiful, and hopes to take me on a date some day. Again, I’m sure he’s a nice guy and everything…but I don’t know? Am I just being picky? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sony12 Posted Wednesday at 07:33 PM Share Posted Wednesday at 07:33 PM 6 minutes ago, lemonicetea said: About a month ago I was talking to a guy on a dating app. Like just basic small talk for a couple of days. Even though he seemed like a nice guy and everything, nothing about his profile stood out to me and I didn’t really find him that attractive (not trying to be shallow). At the time I was trying to operate under the theory that you should engage with everybody who doesn’t raise any red flags. Even if they aren’t your type, who knows, they may surprise you. He eventually stopped responding to me, and it didn’t really bother me because I wasn’t really that into him. Today I got a message from him saying he apologizes for letting our conversation fizzle out but he’s been busy with work. He said that he still wants to talk with me, finds me beautiful, and hopes to take me on a date some day. Again, I’m sure he’s a nice guy and everything…but I don’t know? Am I just being picky? If you want to go ahead and see what he's like. However if you meet him in person and don't find your interest to be increasing just end the situation right there on the first meeting and tell him you don't feel the chemistry. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted Thursday at 03:46 AM Share Posted Thursday at 03:46 AM Go meet over a coffee. Don't have the guy pay for dinner when you're just half hearted. Sometimes life surprises us. My ex-bf had a horrible picture up, l met him over coffee, l expected nothing, we were together 5 years. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted Thursday at 03:56 AM Share Posted Thursday at 03:56 AM I just find it a strange approach, to say that you'll meet up with ANYONE as long as you don't see any red flags. Even people you don't find attractive or who aren't your type. Having a super low bar for who you'll meet up with is just more likely to waste your time and someone else's. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted Thursday at 01:12 PM Share Posted Thursday at 01:12 PM (edited) Lots of people do not photograph well and/or do not have a lot of pictures. If this guy would otherwise be of interest to you, then I think it's fair to arrange a low-key meeting, eg, one where your (and his) financial investment is low. Edited Thursday at 01:14 PM by introverted1 clarification Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sony12 Posted Thursday at 02:05 PM Share Posted Thursday at 02:05 PM 50 minutes ago, introverted1 said: Lots of people do not photograph well and/or do not have a lot of pictures. If this guy would otherwise be of interest to you, then I think it's fair to arrange a low-key meeting, eg, one where your (and his) financial investment is low. In this day in age with how easy it is to take photos that really isn't an excuse. You can take lots of photos and just upload the ones that look best. Maybe that was an excuse back in the day before our phones turned into a camera. But not really anymore. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted Thursday at 05:41 PM Share Posted Thursday at 05:41 PM Some people are just not photogenic and it's not because of the quality of the camera, just like other people are so photogenic they can't take a bad picture no matter what! I would say men don't really know what's a good picture of themselves. I mean just a look at men's profiles online says it all: pictures too far, too blurry, old pictures, pictures with sunglasses while inside, pictures in bathroom mirror. 🙄 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sony12 Posted Thursday at 05:55 PM Share Posted Thursday at 05:55 PM 6 minutes ago, Gaeta said: Some people are just not photogenic and it's not because of the quality of the camera, just like other people are so photogenic they can't take a bad picture no matter what! I would say men don't really know what's a good picture of themselves. I mean just a look at men's profiles online says it all: pictures too far, too blurry, old pictures, pictures with sunglasses while inside, pictures in bathroom mirror. 🙄 To be fair a whole lot of women have the exact type of photos you describe so it's not necessarily a 'man' thing. I have women sending me photos of the men that try to contact them and making jokes about them. So I know what you are describing in regards to men as well. People are just naturally going to gravitate to the people that do have attractive photos up and there is nothing wrong with that. It's why 10 to 20% get lots of attention online and why the rest get very little. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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