famous people

[tns3]

ok so i’m in my first real/serious relationship and weve been together for a year now, safe to say i am very much in love and don’t bat an eye to anyone else. even famous people i can say oh sure that person is attractive but it’s not something i dwell on or fantasize about. my girlfriend on the other hand likes to hyperfixate on people and save suggestive tiktok edits of them or repost them. the thing is it hurts my feelings because i can’t imagine really dreaming of anyone else other than her but obviously she can, it’s like a way of saying “if i could i would” and really im just the person to settle for because im in arms reach. to me there’s not really a difference in crushing on a famous person and a regular person in everyday life other than the social status of each. i just feel a bit disrespected and hurt because i know im so consumed by her i dont think that way but seeing that she does really makes my heart ache. ive tried to bring it up one time and she didn’t take what i was saying serious but idk if maybe i just went about it wrong or if i should try again. so what im asking is am i reasonable to think that way or am i crazy, and what exactly should i do.

[basil67]

It's OK to bring up how this makes you feel, because she's acting like a silly teenager.  Perhaps she is a silly teenager, but that doesn't mean she can't start to learn about how her behaviour makes others feel.    But if she dismisses your feelings, you're going to have to rethink your compatibility with her.   There are plenty of other women out there who will be more considerate, and you shouldn't stay with someone who's actions makes you feel bad

[ShyViolet]

58 minutes ago, tns3 said:

ive tried to bring it up one time and she didn’t take what i was saying serious but idk if maybe i just went about it wrong or if i should try again.

Ok so you've only tried to talk to her about this one time.  And it sounds like you probably didn't explain it properly.  So she's not aware of how you really feel about this..... you should talk to her again and just be more clear about how it makes you feel.

[Gebidozo]

How old is your GF? What you’re describing is common behavior of a very young woman. Personally, I don’t think those teenager fantasies are particularly harmful. Also, you have to understand that fantasizing about someone (or something) and actually acting upon that fantasy are two very different things. But it is a rather annoying and immature behavior, and if it bothers you you should be very clear with her about that. Just be nice and don’t give her orders, ask gently whether she could do you a favor and tone down those things.