rainrhonda Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 I've been seeing a guy now for almost 3 months. A couple weeks ago, I slipped & said I'm falling for him. We were laying in bed...he kinda chuckled then I quickly changed the topic because I was kindof embarrassed. About a week later, he said "I love you" during sex. I just sordof pretended not hear it, I wasn't sure if I should say it back, or what. Also it's during sex, so I don't know if I should take it seriously? We do have a great sex life. Is it the sex he actually loves? Lol. Neither of us have brought it up since. Should I keep pretending it didn't happen or should I ask him about it? Link to post Share on other sites
ShyViolet Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 Saying "I love you" for the first time during sex is problematic. That really sort of cheapens it. It's very unclear whether they really mean it, or whether it was just said in the heat of the moment. If that was the only time he said it, but he never said it again, I would take that to mean he didn't really mean it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainrhonda Posted January 7 Author Share Posted January 7 31 minutes ago, ShyViolet said: Saying "I love you" for the first time during sex is problematic. That really sort of cheapens it. It's very unclear whether they really mean it, or whether it was just said in the heat of the moment. If that was the only time he said it, but he never said it again, I would take that to mean he didn't really mean it. Agreed. We've not seen eachother yet since then, and we text alot but he's a short, simple kind of texter so, figured I may see what happens when I seem him next & gage it that way. Texting is a bad way to bring it up anyhow, lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 On 1/6/2025 at 9:32 PM, rainrhonda said: Should I keep pretending it didn't happen or should I ask him about it? Great relationships are not built on 'pretending nothing happened'. Just own how you feel, if you feel you are falling in love than say so. After 3 months dating it's time to express how we feel. Do you want to 'pretend' another 3 months and turns out he's not falling for you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainrhonda Posted January 8 Author Share Posted January 8 3 hours ago, Gaeta said: Great relationships are not built on 'pretending nothing happened'. Just own how you feel, if you feel you are falling in love than say so. After 3 months dating it's time to express how we feel. Do you want to 'pretend' another 3 months and turns out he's not falling for you? As said in my post, I did say I'm falling for him & when we saw eachother next he said I love you, but during sex. So he must know how I feel, I just don't know what to think of him saying it during sex. We've not seen eachother since then (over a week ago) because of a bad winter storm & we live an hour apart. We text alot but it's not something I want to bring up in text. They say men don't mean anything they say during sex, so just wondered what others opinion might be on that. But I have already said I'm falling for him. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 47 minutes ago, rainrhonda said: As said in my post I know you said it already but, when you're in a relationship do you just say it once? Say it again, see what he says. If he does not say it back then you know it was a spur of the moment sex thing. What do you have to lose? Isn't it better to know now where he stands? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gebidozo Posted January 9 Share Posted January 9 4 hours ago, rainrhonda said: As said in my post, I did say I'm falling for him & when we saw eachother next he said I love you, but during sex. So he must know how I feel, I just don't know what to think of him saying it during sex. We've not seen eachother since then (over a week ago) because of a bad winter storm & we live an hour apart. We text alot but it's not something I want to bring up in text. They say men don't mean anything they say during sex, so just wondered what others opinion might be on that. But I have already said I'm falling for him. You’re assuming things and calculating and guessing instead of just sincerely expressing your feelings and trusting the person you have those feelings for to do the same. Please ignore all those “they say” advices, they mean nothing when torn out of context. Be open, honest, and vulnerable, otherwise the relationship won’t work. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainrhonda Posted January 9 Author Share Posted January 9 16 hours ago, Gaeta said: I know you said it already but, when you're in a relationship do you just say it once? Say it again, see what he says. If he does not say it back then you know it was a spur of the moment sex thing. What do you have to lose? Isn't it better to know now where he stands? We've not said it's a relationship, so guess we need to discuss that 1st. Lol Link to post Share on other sites
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