This Relationship Is Driving Me Crazy, Should I Walk Away?

[BulletDodged]

58 minutes ago, ExpatInItaly said:

Nope, you don't owe her anything. 

Don't bother explaining yourself to someone who is probably already messaging with her new Bumble matches. 

 

Yeh I won't do it. Plus it will give her a reason to open up an argument again 

[BulletDodged]

54 minutes ago, S2B said:

Don’t ever message her. It’s over! You need to not care at all how she thinks of you.

 

Thanks I will not contact her, or care what she thinks.

 

She can think the worse of me if she wants.. we are no longer together, so it doesn't matter either way

[BulletDodged]

I need to vent, as struggling a little with the break up.

 

Simple question. 

She last sent me a text message a week ago, I only caught a glimpse of it.. I didn't even read it all, only the first line. It's was a big text message.

 

She seems to be gaslighting alot, and shifting blame on me.

I chose not to read the text message and immediately deleted it.

I did this to protect my own feelings and so that I can move on.

Sometimes an ex can say things, that could mess with your head endlessly.

 

Was it ok for me to ignore and delete her text message?

[Acacia98]

Yes. It was right and proper for you to ignore and delete her message. I refer you to my last comment on the subject:

Quote

 

I think you're being a bit passive by putting yourself in a situation where she continues to influence how you feel about yourself.

Why don't you take control of your situation by blocking her? That way, you won't have to deal with her anymore or to worry about her feelings because you will have no way of knowing whether she's written.

Your relationship is over. You don't owe each other anything, not even a conversation or the kindness of a listening ear. If she wants someone to rant to about your relationship, she should turn to her loved ones or a therapist. Arguments and finger-pointing are stupid at this point. Presumably, she ended the relationship because she was tired of all the terrible things she claims you did. So what's to discuss? The "problem" has been fixed. You're no longer in her life doing "terrible things." She needs to move on. And you can help her with that by blocking her. 

 

 

[ExpatInItaly]

54 minutes ago, BulletDodged said:

Was it ok for me to ignore and delete her text message?

This was the smart thing to do. 

 

[BulletDodged]

1 hour ago, Acacia98 said:

Yes. It was right and proper for you to ignore and delete her message. I refer you to my last comment on the subject:

 

I only caught the first line of the text From her, and it seemed like an angry one. It's so easy to get pulled into a back and forth when someone triggers your emotions.. therefore I decided to just delete & protect my mental health, as I was already feeling down and depressed.

[NuevoYorko]

3 hours ago, BulletDodged said:

I only caught the first line of the text From her, and it seemed like an angry one. It's so easy to get pulled into a back and forth when someone triggers your emotions.. therefore I decided to just delete & protect my mental health, as I was already feeling down and depressed.

It seems as if you are sort of savoring opportunities to be angry at / about her.   Please just block and leave it behind you.  

[BulletDodged]

Why would she end it with me? And when I agree with the break up & let her know that I want to break up too.. She then starts acting like, I initiated the break up? And then she claims she respects my decision.

Lol she is the one who Initiated the break up, I simply didn't put up a fight. 

Is this manipulation?

By the way, I have remained very stoic about this, while she has sent me paragraphs of text messages.

 

[basil67]

3 minutes ago, BulletDodged said:

Why would she end it with me? And when I agree with the break up & let her know that I want to break up too.. She then starts acting like, I initiated the break up? And then she claims she respects my decision.

Lol she is the one who Initiated the break up, I simply didn't put up a fight. 

Is this manipulation?

By the way, I have remained very stoic about this, while she has sent me paragraphs of text messages.

 

You are now away from a crazy-making relationship....don't waste brain cells worrying about what she said

And why have you not blocked her?

[ExpatInItaly]

9 hours ago, BulletDodged said:

Why would she end it with me?

She was probably interested in some other man. 

9 hours ago, BulletDodged said:

And when I agree with the break up & let her know that I want to break up too.. She then starts acting like, I initiated the break up?

She wanted you around as Plan B. 

9 hours ago, BulletDodged said:

she has sent me paragraphs of text messages.

And you are letting her wipe her feet on you like this because....? 

[NuevoYorko]

I hope you've blocked and have started putting this behind you.  

[BulletDodged]

13 hours ago, NuevoYorko said:

I hope you've blocked and have started putting this behind you.  

I have yes. No lie it's not easy, but has to be done.