What would happen when there is no distance any more?

[little green]

He and I had a 6-year history, including more than 3 years of long-distance relationship. Our relationship had been on and off for a couple of times, and now it's in the middle. We are not officially a couple, but we call each other every day and talk sweet. We both know that it won't work if we are not physically together, so one day he asked: what if I move to your city and live with you?

I was not excited. I am actually very confused if I love him. We had very bad and very good memories of each other during the past 6 years. On the one hand, I treasure what we had and want "us" to work. I mean, we are good together. We support each other, we enjoy the company of each other, we laugh together, we cook together....nothing seems standing in the way of his request of moving in together.

But there is something missing. The passion. I don't miss him. When I was with him, I was happy. But somehow I get used to live alone without thinking of him. Sometimes my call is out of obligations. It also bothers me that I have the desire to meet new people. Wasn't/Isn't him the one I love? Do I love him? Or I just cannot stand a love without infatuation?

[Outcast]

The passion. I don't miss him. When I was with him, I was happy. But somehow I get used to live alone without thinking of him. Sometimes my call is out of obligations.

 

It has been my experience that when you care about someone, they always occupy a spot in your heart. And you'd prefer that they occupy a spot in your home.

[Astarte]

Agree with outcast.

And imho - love is passion.

You don't seem sure, so as you're not, I wouldn' do it...

[Darkwall]

Sounds to me as though you're having some doubts, perfectly normal. It's also normal that being apart even though you speak to each other every day has put some "distance" between you emotionally. Distance seperates people on many levels. I think you have become USED TO not being with him and now as a result you're questioning if you even love him, right. Well, you're only human. You need to follow your heart and listen to what it's telling you. Be honest with yourself. Passion changes later in relationships, you have it in different forms. Only you know if you have that. The fact that you're considering to meet new people is probably you wanting to fill a void. but please don't bring your bf over to fill that void. YOu're obviously holding onto something all these years for a reason. You need to have a heart to heart talk with your beau and be truthful about your feelings and your needs.

[silktricks]

He and I had a 6-year history, including more than 3 years of long-distance relationship. Our relationship had been on and off for a couple of times, and now it's in the middle. We are not officially a couple, but we call each other every day and talk sweet. We both know that it won't work if we are not physically together, so one day he asked: what if I move to your city and live with you?

I was not excited. I am actually very confused if I love him. We had very bad and very good memories of each other during the past 6 years. On the one hand, I treasure what we had and want "us" to work. I mean, we are good together. We support each other, we enjoy the company of each other, we laugh together, we cook together....nothing seems standing in the way of his request of moving in together.

But there is something missing. The passion. I don't miss him. When I was with him, I was happy. But somehow I get used to live alone without thinking of him. Sometimes my call is out of obligations. It also bothers me that I have the desire to meet new people. Wasn't/Isn't him the one I love? Do I love him? Or I just cannot stand a love without infatuation?

 

Part of love IS passion. Love without passion is friendship. It's important to be good friends with our lover, but it's just as important to be passionate. If he chooses to move to your city to try to have things work with you, be clear that it's his choice, and that things may NOT work, so that his expectations do not coerce a relationship out of a friendship.