Low point of my life, how to get over it?

[depress]

I am not trying to be pessimisstic or pathetic here, but recently i am pretty depressed when i looked back what I had achieved so far. Just want to share if there is any fellow loveshacks had similiar experience, and how you get over it.

 

I just don't know why I can't lead a happy life just as others. In love affairs I had lost the one that I love and recently knew that she is doing quite fine with her new guy, and I cannot find a way to shake away the good days I had with her in the past, those beautiful scenes still keep ringing on me every single day; and each time it came, pain from the deep down follows.

 

In work I was almost torned by the pressure and politics in company. I am working in the IT field so you know what a bad market I am dealing with and damn it those senior is so good in stealing my achievements and count that as their own. and i can do nothing for I am the new guy there.

 

and the worst is that in leisure time I just cannot find anything to kill the time. Got not much friends, and don't have the mood to reach out and know more because I am so depressed now

 

Anyone has been through this kind of process and crawl back out from this kind of situation? I know I had to stand up again but I just don't know how. I don't want to be a rotten freak just as what I am now

[scotch]

I have been depressed before. I think you should exercise, and go to a counselor. Coounseling can only help. even the healthiest person.

 

Try to not be attached to outcomes. DO what you think is right at all times.

 

Everyone goes thru hard times when things dont work out with someone you loved and lost. Just try to stay positive. It is good to have loved and it teaches you lessons. You know more what you want in the future. Remember that you have friends and family. Talk to them.

I am not trying to be pessimisstic or pathetic here, but recently i am pretty depressed when i looked back what I had achieved so far. Just want to share if there is any fellow loveshacks had similiar experience, and how you get over it. I just don't know why I can't lead a happy life just as others. In love affairs I had lost the one that I love and recently knew that she is doing quite fine with her new guy, and I cannot find a way to shake away the good days I had with her in the past, those beautiful scenes still keep ringing on me every single day; and each time it came, pain from the deep down follows.

 

In work I was almost torned by the pressure and politics in company. I am working in the IT field so you know what a bad market I am dealing with and damn it those senior is so good in stealing my achievements and count that as their own. and i can do nothing for I am the new guy there. and the worst is that in leisure time I just cannot find anything to kill the time. Got not much friends, and don't have the mood to reach out and know more because I am so depressed now

 

Anyone has been through this kind of process and crawl back out from this kind of situation? I know I had to stand up again but I just don't know how. I don't want to be a rotten freak just as what I am now

[Miss Mojo]

hi depress,

 

i don't think you sound pathetic or terribly pessimistic. i'd go so far as to say that what you're feeling right now has been experienced by a great deal of us out there at some stage or another. some people find putting on a happy face and just pushing along a lot easier than others. i know that i have definitely been in your shoes before.

 

i can 100% relate to not being able to shake the good days you shared with someone you love....especially if the relationship was a really good one that didn't work out for whatever reason. i don't know how long you have been apart from this girl, but i have recently found out that some people who grace your life are not as easy to get over as others might be. a loss is a loss all the same and sometimes it affects us in a way that we would never have predicted in a million years. the only advice i can give you on dealing with this is to not beat yourself up about your ex's new relationship. if she is still in your life, maybe you could find it in yourself to not associate with her in any way for the time being. you don't want to prolong the process and torture yourself by knowing what is going on in her life. i have been in this situation too. it hurt like hell, but i didn't want a part of it. to this day, i do not know the status of my ex's relationship (if there is one anymore), and i don't want to know. i have no need to know. if you are having an exceptionally hard time dealing with this, then by all means, speak to a counsellor.

 

what i do know is that oneday i won't feel hurt by the memories and i won't feel pain over this guy. i know that oneday i will meet another person who i will have a great connection with again. if i can have that kind of connection with one person out of billions, i will have it again. i never give up on that hope, but i'm in no way in a rush for it. time to myself has helped me heal a great deal, and so has accepting the way i feel

 

as for your job, i don't think there's many places out there where you can avoid a hierarchy of some sort. are you 100% certain that people are claiming your achievements as their own? if so, speak up to these people and just casually mention your input in the task at hand. don't be afraid to give yourself a good rap for your own ideas. if no-one else is going to notice (which is quite common in business), then make it known. give yourself a plug without gloating if you're not getting credit where it's deserved.

 

i know it can be really hard to pick yourself up when you are feeling down, but unless you want to spend longer than necessary feeling this way, you have to make a concerted effort to change things for YOUR sake. that would include going out, even with the few friends you have, making new friends by doing courses at community colleges if you have the time, attending work functions and making yourself known amongst the staff, making plans to travel, or something to save for, avoiding situations where you may run into your ex etc.

 

what usually makes me feel better is finding a particular goal and striving towards it. right now, that is travel for me. i've finally put in my resignation at my workplace, because i'm just not happy there anymore. i'm going to move onto other things where i can meet new people, and save my money to travel again.

 

we can spend so much time dwelling on what ISN'T, or we can spend time thinking about everything in life that IS, and everything that CAN BE. you really can pull yourself out of this rut you are in....just do it one step at a time and be kind to yourself.

 

best wishes

 

p.s. you're not a rotten freak!! you're normal!