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those who have found the "one"-


Brittanyjean06

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Brittanyjean06

Just out of curiosity- and hope for myself lol-

 

did you go through a hard time before you met your wife/husband/fiance----other past heartaches that made you feel like you would never love again.

 

and times where you felt like your world was over?---

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Still waiting and I don't know if there is such a person as the "one". I think there are several people who can fill that role and they will change as you mature. Love is such a wonderful feeling so I think we will always strive to be in-love. Hang in there. You will love more than once in your life.:)

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Brittany

 

Before I met my current BF (we are together 6 years now) I felt so beaten-up emotionally speaking.

 

I'd been in a long-term relationship that ended badly over sex (lack of it--on his end) and alcohol (too much of it--on his end). We'd tried to work on things but talking never changed much and finally, I ended things. There were lots of tears, arguments and pain. Then I entered the dating scene. God! What a cesspool of users, confusers and abusers!

 

I think I was completely and utterly ready to give up. Then I met this really 'nice' guy. I got to know him gradually. We developed a friendship. That led to more. It took us about a year to really start 'dating' and from then on, it was a natural process to where we are now.

 

Boy, what a relief from the drama and games!

 

It takes time, Brittany. But the good guys are out there. I think some of us just have to get sick of the players and idiots in order to appreciate them.

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did you go through a hard time before you met your wife/husband/fiance----other past heartaches that made you feel like you would never love again.

 

and times where you felt like your world was over?---

 

Oh HELL yes! I've sworn off men at least three different times in my life! :laugh:

 

But, like JayKay, I'm in a relationship now that feels so easy and natural that I have to keep pinching myself to make sure "the one" I'm with now isn't just a dream. And I can honestly say I am the happiest now than I can ever remember being in my entire life.

 

In the end, the pay-off of finally finding Johnny made all those difficult relationship lessons worth every tear and heartache. And I'd gladly travel that bumpy road all over again if I knew it eventually led to him. :love:

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Brittanyjean06

i love reading those stories- I just wish i could see the out come- but i know in my heart it will be a good one- one day

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Well my best friend went through hell before meeting her current BF.

 

When I first met her, she was engaged to this other guy. He had OCD and a lot of social anxiety and really was pretty miserable most of the time. She stuck by him for years....and I mean YEARS....because she loved him. His OCD got really bad. He also became very critical and manipulative and she spent the last few years with him feeling pretty despondant. Then he finally cheated on her.

She lost it, big time. She threw him out, tossed out his things and cried for about 2 weeks straight and picked up cigarettes again.

Then she dated three guys in a row; the first was young and dumb and she got bored quickly and broke up with him. The next one was also too young, but a little brighter. He was actually entertaining and funny and she got pretty hooked on him. Until she found out he was a habitual liar and was cheating on her with his ex-GF.

Things ended on a very ugly note.

Feeling she could never trust a man again, she stayed 'just friends' with this musician guy who was pursuing her like gangbusters. She made him wait a year to date her. Then when they started dating, he pushed the romance factor fast and furious. He wanted them to live together. Then he wanted to get engaged. It was all hearts and flowers. She started falling for him, although she said something in her gut didn't feel quite right.

She found out he was sleeping with one of the girls in his band and got her knocked up.

I think that's when she went up to 2 packs of cigarettes a day.

SHe got so depressed it was all she could do to drag herself out of bed in the morning.

 

Fast forward and today, she's with a wonderful man who's mature, intelligent, TOGETHER and who loves her.

 

She said after all the liars and cheats and immaturity, she can't believe her luck.

 

They are planning on getting married in the near future. She talks about him in ways I've never heard her talk about anyone. I think she really met the love of her life.

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SuperFantastico

I think everyone needs to have the 'big love' before they understand it enough to get into an actual healthy relationship. We all need time to mature and grow confident and comfortable with who we are before we can give someone else our all.

 

just like the great buffy the vampire slayer said about herself not being ready

for 'the one'

 

Because? okay. I?m cookie dough. I?m not done baking. I?m not finished becoming whoever the hell it is I?m going to turn out to be. I make it through this and the next thing and the next thing and maybe one day I turn around and realize I?m ready. I?m cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat m? (covers) or enjoy warm, delicious cookie-me, then that?s fine. That?ll be then. When I?m done.

 

I rest my case :sick:

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