Freckles1001 Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 I went on a first date with a man this past weekend. We both had a great time, lots of flirting, great conversation, etc. He takes my hand as we cross the road, he asks if I'd like to "do this again" - I reply yes. He kisses me (I melt) and I drive home. That was Sunday. Today is Friday. Is it absolutely a done deal that he won't call? Opinions on this? I know it was only one date - but I felt that spark. His actions and words said that he did too...but nada since then. Maybe he was being polite? What a strange way to be polite - by asking if I'd like to get together again... Link to post Share on other sites
Blackard Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Wait two days and call him, ask him out, take him out. This is the year 2006. Not too many guys left who want to play prince charming. Most are looking for partners. ;p Do something he likes. Does he enjoy dinner? Sports? Theater? Link to post Share on other sites
gfto Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 I don't think it's a done deal that he won't call. Personally, I used to wait about five days to call for a second date. It probably isn't what you'd like to hear, but I suspect he has some other dates lined up. Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 if you're going to go the route of asking men out, then ask some OTHER men out and forget about this guy. sounds like he's either busy or got other dates. he may get back to you though. did you meet him on the internet? Link to post Share on other sites
Freckles1001 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Yes, we met online. We spoke on the phone for a few weeks and then he asked me out. We've truly had great conversation both on the date and before. I guess I am used to men calling if they had a good time. Why would he say, "can we do this again?" and then kiss me if he didn't have a good time? I absolutely think he's dating several women...I guess it's the new reality with online dating. I'll have to get used to it. Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Yes, we met online. We spoke on the phone for a few weeks and then he asked me out. We've truly had great conversation both on the date and before. I guess I am used to men calling if they had a good time. Why would he say, "can we do this again?" and then kiss me if he didn't have a good time? I absolutely think he's dating several women...I guess it's the new reality with online dating. I'll have to get used to it. he likes you but had other buns already in the oven. he may get back to you. good thing is you can fill up your dance card the same way. yeah its the new reality--numbers game. you 'process' a bunch of prospects Link to post Share on other sites
Freckles1001 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 It's very new to me - this whole online thing. But, I guess I didn't make that much of an impression if he hasn't contacted me. Nothing I can really do about it - and I am fighting the urge to call him of course. Hey, maybe he'll call on day 7...not sure anymore if I should hope for that. Link to post Share on other sites
Freckles1001 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Bumping for the morning crowd I know this has got to be a very common question, but the discussion is helpful. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Well as the others have suggested IMO he's most likely dating others as well and doesn't feel a sense of urgency to get back with you... I still think he will, the question is when he does are you going to want to go out with him again? I just cannot be all about the "I'll call you in 3 or 10 days" thing... (thats just me though) I can think of 2 situations that happened to me where one Guy I had just met (he was the stripper at my gf's bachelorette party) asked me if he could give me his number... uh... I told him I wasn't going to call him... so then he asked if he could have my number... I gave it to him and who knew? He called me that night a few hours later and again the next day to set up a date... and then there is my currant BF who asked for my number when I met him and I told him that I would give him my number but ONLY if he was going to call and show some damn interest I was very direct in letting him know I wasn't all about the "I'm going to be slick and call her a** in 3 or 10 days" deal and that if that was his deal not to bother....he called the next morning. Link to post Share on other sites
Freckles1001 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Thanks, Merin. Good perspective. I'm too old for games...really. Link to post Share on other sites
Gator762 Posted January 14, 2006 Share Posted January 14, 2006 Well, I feel for ya freckles. Guess I wouldn't give up yet, but he should call you soon if he really has interest. As others said, it sounds like he is dating others. Personally, that isn't my style, and ask yourself if that's your style too. I haven't done the online thing yet, but am getting DARN tempted! I've been outta the game for years, and it seems the traditional way is now outdated! I'm more of the exclusive type - even dating. If I'm interested in you then I'll call you within a few days. I've done a few casual flings, but it just isn't the same as with someone I'm emotionally connected with. Ask yourself what kind of person you are, and the answer will come to you! Good luck out there! Link to post Share on other sites
Freckles1001 Posted January 15, 2006 Share Posted January 15, 2006 Gator - thanks for your perspective. I am much more the "one date" kind of girl. But it's not the reality for most people anymore unfortunately. I am newly single after a long-term relationship (I was engaged actually), so am feeling my way here a bit. I'm glad I didn't marry the man I was engaged to, but boy, it's rough out there. Guess I need a thicker skin If he doesn't call it certainly isn't the end of my world, but it sure is confusing. Link to post Share on other sites
Gator762 Posted January 15, 2006 Share Posted January 15, 2006 I feel your pain - I'm recently separated, and have been out of the game for a while. Hold out for as long as you are comfortable. If he isn't one of them, there are decent guys out there... Like me! JK That's what I'm doing now - I had a woman friend, who was interested in being more, but I maintained it as friends. She just got back from vacation, and I hope is just busy with schoolwork. After all she considers me a friend... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t79353/ Link to post Share on other sites
LawGirl Posted January 15, 2006 Share Posted January 15, 2006 I feel your pain - I'm recently separated, and have been out of the game for a while. Hold out for as long as you are comfortable. If he isn't one of them, there are decent guys out there... Like me! JK That's what I'm doing now - I had a woman friend, who was interested in being more, but I maintained it as friends. She just got back from vacation, and I hope is just busy with schoolwork. After all she considers me a friend... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t79353/ Wish there were more of you out there (decent guys) .... coming to Canada any time soon? Link to post Share on other sites
Freckles1001 Posted January 15, 2006 Share Posted January 15, 2006 Gator - I just read your post about moving a friend along to something more. You sound like a super guy - and if she had feelings for you once, they'll be there again once she understands your intentions...trust me on this. I had a strong attraction (it was mutual) to a married friend of mine. We're great friends still and I respect his marriage (even though it's not a happy one); however, if he were to become single, I wouldn't hesitate at all...my feelings are harnessed into a friendship because that's what's right...but they're still there nonetheless. I wish you luck there, truly. Link to post Share on other sites
Gator762 Posted January 15, 2006 Share Posted January 15, 2006 Thanks Freckles! Did you get a call yet? I hope things turn out well for you too. In the past, sometimes I'd wait too long to call back too, because as men we don't want to come off as too eager. Good luck, and thanks for reading my post! Link to post Share on other sites
Gator762 Posted January 15, 2006 Share Posted January 15, 2006 Wish there were more of you out there (decent guys) .... coming to Canada any time soon? Thanks for reading LawGirl! Hmmm, I don't live too far from the border! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts