love2love Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Hi all, So I posted on here about how my ex and I were Iming to each other and he told me I'm the one that got away . Well I have had responses saying that he is just trying to see if he can still have me for an ego trip ( Because he is dating someone he says he loves but doesn't see her as the one) . Well I ended up going to a get together of a friend of his friend's friend. So basically my ex -boyfriend's friend took me to a concert one day and I met his friend and we hit it off about a year ago. Well the guy from the concert has never forgotten me and invites me to his Birthday party and my ex manages to talk his friend into bringing him along because he says he is supposedly bored and just wants to go to this party for fun ( Keep in mind he does not bring his girlfriend and tells her it's boys night out..and for sure he didn't tell her his ex girlfriend was going to be there) So I am at the party with my ex and the new guy which I like a lot. My ex then proceeds to get wasted and tells me he loves me and that I was the best and then I overhear him telling one of our mutual friends that he is getting his act together and that he's sure I will take him back ( he broke up with me) and then we'll be having babies when he's ready for a family. granted this guy is 37!! I always heard that when someone is drunk they say what they most feel without any inhinitions .... so deep down inside do you think my ex boyfriend still loves me and really does plan to be with me forever? Please advise I love this guy still and I don't know if it's just wishful thinking or what to do.Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 ... this latin proverb ("in wine, the truth") is definitely true. Or at least, a truth. I have little doubt that what he said represents his feelings. But relationships require more than fuzzy feelings. They require a sustained commitment of the mind and will. A drunken comment gives you no clue here. And these attributes are precisely the qualities that a 37 year old on-off commitment male is likely to lack. Link to post Share on other sites
Devildog Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 You know my XW believed that the things I said when she made me truly mad were my real feelings. And I know when I was drunk I really could beat up the 6'5" 285 lb. wall of muscle. And I could dance too. While we are drunk, or emotionally unstable, there might be some small measure of truth in how we feel. But it is the purely emotional part stripped of all rational thought. In your situation I think it is possible that your X still holds some feelings for you, but the getting his life straightened out and having babies was the alcohol talking. But I am sure you are waiting with eager anticipation for a second chance to be with a guy who lies to his current GF to be able to flirt with his XGF and make drunken proclamations of his intentions of infidelity. I mean, who could pass on a winner such as that? (This sarcasm was meant to show you this guy isn't so great) Link to post Share on other sites
RainyDayWoman Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 in my experience, people who are drunk may be inclined to lie just as often as they are inclined to tell the truth. i think it depends on the person, the moment, what they drank, and the amount they consumed. i've seen people have one or two drinks and get loosened up enough to be honest about something they normally might not have, and i have seen people smashed enough to try to convince someone of something they know isn't true. so, no, i don't think there are any real answers to this one. Link to post Share on other sites
dahlia Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 I agree with what Rainy said. I think many drunk people are great bs artists. So don't believe it a person says it when they are drunk that it's the truth~ Take care Link to post Share on other sites
AltplanB Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 These confessions are real only if they are just so hammered that they cant stand up. My ex told me that she still loved me and i told her the same but she said she didn't want to hurt me again and she felt so bad for putting me through all that and that she doesn't want to risk it again. This is pretty much the same thing she told me when she was sober. Shes bulimic and her feelings change like that. Anyways, were not talking right now and i hate her more everyday. Link to post Share on other sites
skeptik224 Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 I'm a firm believer that some people are more free with their emotions when they're drunk. That doesn't mean that you should take their words as gold. They should be confessing their love when they're sober - it would mean A LOT more! Communication is the key... Link to post Share on other sites
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