Suburbanlife03 Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years the day before Christmas Eve. We were having problems but the problems really didn't have anything to do with us. It's his Mom. That's why we broke up. I always got into it with her because she would say some mean things to me, I don't think she meant to be mean, but they were things she shouldn't have been saying. Anyway, they have a family tradition for everything and every Christmas he spends pretty much the whole 48 hrs with his family. I was going to be all alone this Christmas without him so I asked him to spare some time...more than the usual couple of hours. He said no, and I broke up with him. I want him back and he knows it, but he won't answer the phone when I call, he won't return my emails, and I just went to the hospital recently & they thought I had meningitis and he never called to see if I was alright. He told my friend that he doesn't want the responsibility of having a relationship right now, but I think it's because I made it a responsibility. I made him responsible for my happiness. I don't know what to do. I love this man with all my heart, and I don't think I can live without him. I know it's not because I'm lonely or bored that I miss him, because we've been over for awhile and I've had plenty of offers, but I don't want them. I don't want anyone but my ex. If anyone has any advice on what to do, please help me. Thank you Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 He's right. You did make him responsible for your own happiness. You have to stop trying to contact him and give him some space. YOU broke up with him, remember? He's probably hurting a bit right now too. Figure out why you needed him to make you happy. Do you feel you lack self-esteem? Do you need his approval to make you happy? If so, then I would suggest you read a few books on building confidence and self-esteem. Those are the core issues that contribute to the dependency on others. He can't miss you if you don't back away and give him some space. Link to post Share on other sites
coasting Posted January 21, 2006 Share Posted January 21, 2006 I know the feeling of wanting someone back. It is not an easy feeling to adjust to, But you need to realize if you continue to call him, and email him with no responses from him, you are just going to push himfurther away. he has told his friend he does not want the responsibility of a relationship right now; honor this wish and give him, his space and time. Show him that you can be without him. Trust me if he wants you backin his life he will let you know. I myself was left a few days before thanksgiving and had to go through the holidays without the man I love. New Year's eve his mother passed away, and I had to go to the wake and funeral...It wasn't easy as he left me for another woman, and I work in the same place as these two...It was a very hard six weeks and I am now finally coming to terms with it all. I love this man more then anything in the world, but if he doesn't want to be with me I can't make him. The best thing to do is to make yourself look gorgous, and let him see you out and about having a good time with friends, and trust me if he really wants you in his life he will come calling. But please do not go out with someone just to make your ex jealous...just let him know that there is life after him! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts