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whatwentwrong

I am devastated that my lover of 30 years who always said he would never leave me has left me and is now seeing our kids two evenings per week and every other weekend. I am sadder than I have ever been in my entire life. My husband seems happier than he has ever been. How can that be.

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I am devastated that my lover of 30 years who always said he would never leave me has left me and is now seeing our kids two evenings per week and every other weekend. I am sadder than I have ever been in my entire life. My husband seems happier than he has ever been. How can that be.

 

I'm so sorry this happened to you. All you can do right now is hang on and know that someday you will pull through this. He seems fine right now because he had already emotionally checked out before he left. You were blindsided and it will take more time until you adjust. Hold on to your kids and hug them tight.

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whatwentwrong

thanks so much for your thoughts. I am holding them. I have now asked him to cut off all communication and I have moved from a temp separation to a total separation and then in 6 months divorce. I am 45 and petrified. he was sexually abused at 15 and did not tell me until now so the entire thing has been a farce for 30 years.

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I am right there with you in the way you are feeling....

 

If it wasn't for my kids, best friend(s) and my huge family, I would be tempted to lay down and die.

 

I think when I don't want to see anybody or go anywhere, I just try to do something simple, like get gas in the car, or go for a walk on the beach, or try to do something nice for someone else, so I am not contemplating my own situation. In other words, distractions.....

 

Sometimes - easier said than done though, right now I am a hermit - which is so not like me.....

 

We have to ban together!!!! :D

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