scarletstar1 Posted August 20, 2001 Share Posted August 20, 2001 Hi...I'm really new at this but I need help. Let me star from the beginning. I went out with a guy (aka Paul) for approx five years. Through this time we have made mutual friends who we are both extremely close to. But now things are on the rocks with Paul. We currently are not together but we hang out every day and are trying to fix our relationship, although I'm the only one who's actually trying to do something about it. In the meantime I have become very close to Paul's best friend who is also my best friend for the past five years (aka Sam). Sam has expressed a sincere interest in me...if Paul weren't in the picture. I truly know he likes me ..and I am liking him so much it feels wierd. I have feelings I haven't had in years. Sam is constantly getting his heart broken by girls and I always give him advice as to how to deal with things. And in my relationship with Paul he has always been by my side. I like him so much and I can't stand to see him with another girl again. I ffeel that I want to be wit him, but I also have feelings for my ex...5 years is a long time. But what I feel for Sam is unreal...I get butterflies and everything. We joke than if we're both single at 28 we will marry each other. We flirt a lot and when he touches me I feel warmth and love, I am so confused....I wanna be with him ...I think...but I don't want to hurt anyone, but I think he could be the one. I don't know if I can wait, if he finds someone else, I don't know if the hurt will evr go away. PLEASE HELP Scarlet Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 20, 2001 Share Posted August 20, 2001 Well, you need to be with your friend, not with Paul. Let's see if we can get you there. Have a talk with your friend. Let him know how you feel but also let him know if the feelings are mutual that it may take a while to get together. Also, tell him all this must be keep confidential and discrete. Break up with your boyfriend. Just stop trying to patch up something that's not there. I mean how much of an effort could you possibly be making to make things work when you are all smitten with his friend??? Once you have broken up, let some time pass...a few months anyway. During this time, you can do things with his friend on a platonic basis and get to know each other better. Then gradually let it flow into a more romantic situation. Breaking up with your ex and immediately starting to date his friend would be wrong. But it would also be wrong not to pursue something you feel so strongly about. It would also be wrong to keep stringing along this current boyfriend you know you don't want to be with. Link to post Share on other sites
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