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How many here doing Online Dating?


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I just got burned not 1x but 2x from on-line dating...but both times I was desperate to find a man or get over one....:p

 

It depends, I have heard of plenty of people who find and marry men online.

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I'm thinking of putting up a profile. Anyone having luck with this? Is it worth paying for? Any tips?

 

Ha, ask Alphamale about setting up a profile! :lmao: (BTW alpha, have you checked that profile recently or did you take it down???)

 

I think you need to just be yourself. Be honest, put some humour in there and your picture too. You're very cute!

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jen_jen_heartbroken

I was in two long-term relationships through online sites. One guy was a narcisscist, and the other was a commitment-phobic emotional cripple. It would be a very long time before I considered online dating again....I think it attracts the wrong type of men.

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You could be right Jen. My mother became a widow five years ago and has been doing the online dating thing for about 4 years. She's giving up on it saying to me "After all, would (insert name of her deceased H) have done that or would (insert name of my H) ever do that if he were single?

 

The answer was a resounding NO!

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Hey cygny,

 

Thanks for your response to my post "can you guys tell me why men do this?" That guy that I was referring to was actually someone I met online. Let me tell you, I have had my FAIR SHARE of bad dates but then I've had some that lasted more than a couple of months. I think that with anything, you have to take it with a grain of salt. I say go for it, it will expand upon your dating pool.

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jen_jen_heartbroken
Hey cygny,

 

Thanks for your response to my post "can you guys tell me why men do this?" That guy that I was referring to was actually someone I met online. Let me tell you, I have had my FAIR SHARE of bad dates but then I've had some that lasted more than a couple of months. I think that with anything, you have to take it with a grain of salt. I say go for it, it will expand upon your dating pool.

 

OMG! Are you sure you're not dating my ex? I also met Mr. I'm-too-overwhelmed-with-work-to-call-or-see-you-or-be-emotionally-invested-in-our-relationship online.

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Holy cow - as a man looking for something genuine I decided to try onlne dating. My biggest battle is convincing the women that I am NOT one of the fruitcakes/nutcases/perverts/MM in disguise etc. etc. out there.

 

In fact, given the couple of dates I've been on, I have to ask, are there any genuine women out there.

 

I guess the answer is - YMMV - from day to day, but at least, you have half a chance of making some friends.

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jen_jen_heartbroken

Men on online dating sites:

 

10% fruitcakes

20% perverts

30% MM in disguise

50% nutcases

100% commitmentphobes

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Formermatchmaker

My experience with on and offline dating agencies (and I have some insider perspective) is that the men are looking for someone attractive, slim and preferably a little younger and the women are looking for a well groomed, financially stable professional. Honestly, both are kinda rare amongst the ranks of those needing to use a dating service. In fact, I'd go as far as to say many folks who are looking online are doing so because their expectations far exceed what they are capable of finding in the "real world".

 

That's not to say that online dating doesn't work. I know people who have met and found love etc etc etc. But they were folks who were realistic about their desires and single minded and practical in their determination to get married and start breeding. As far as casual dating goes, it just seems to create a lot of frustration.

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Well from my point of view, I have used it in the past. However, I met all of my "ex's" in the real world. go figure...

 

Cygny, if you are who say you are, from the other posts, give me a howler... :love:;)

 

These are my experience:

My personal tastes are older intelligent beautiful alpha women (alpha in moderation) which are not easy finding online.

 

Yes there are many women out there that just have to high of expectations. Some have preconceived notions before replying. Also there are more males doing online dating than women.

 

Some of my friends that have tried it had women who are too clingy and needy; plus younger than him. I said to him, his expectations are a little to high, as in 85+% compatibility before saying hi.

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I've done it a few times, and while it's always fun at first - women get lots of attention on those sites, it tends to lose its appeal fast one loser after another. There are some good guys on there, but you have to weed through some strange ones first. Many people on there are socially inept or bitter from past relationships.

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I keep the profiles (2) up as a kind of 'experiment'.

 

It keeps me informed of what (who's) out there and what new games they are playing.

 

There are always games, which I, personally, detest.

 

None of my experiences with online dating have been favorable.

 

Even the ones I thought might be a little less deceitful turned out to just be better, more creative 'players'.

 

And it's true what posters here are saying: there are scads of commitment phobes in online dating.

 

It seems they flock to it because of the increased opportunity for switching off immediately to another person when they are quite finished with the one they are 'dating'.

 

If you try to use it seriously to find a 'someone special', your chances are slim-to-none in finding him/her, and it may actually turn out to be, at the least, a disheartening attempt at finding a date, mate, or even a decent friend, -and at the worst, a nightmarish one.

 

But it does help me stay on top of the creative new twists in the old, and rather distasteful games of liars, cheaters, hope killers, and flesh eaters who are out there by the thousands, trolling the internet dating sites for fresh, new 'meat' every day.

 

(sigh)

 

-Rio

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I Luv the Chariot OH
Men on online dating sites:

 

10% fruitcakes

20% perverts

30% MM in disguise

50% nutcases

100% commitmentphobes

I'd say there's a waaay higher percentage of perverts. Like, at least 99%.

 

I'd never pay for an online dating service, but I went on a free one more oriented at young people just for fun (okcupid), and I met some cool people there. Pretty much, as a female, you just sit back and watch the guys fawn over you.

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Cyg my advice is dont do it!

 

You need to heal and get over your ex before you put yourself back out there!

 

The reason I say this is that whoever you meet you will compare him to your ex, and lets be honest you will meet alot of creeps whilst online dating - I also sort of think that (dont shoot me here) people who online date come across as a bit desperate!

 

You are beautiful Cyg and I think right now you should just go out and socialise and have fun - And when the time is right you will meet your next guy! Rebounds rarely, if ever, work. You do not need more heartache baby - You need nourishment not punishment! :)

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I also sort of think that (dont shoot me here) people who online date come across as a bit desperate!

 

I won't shoot ya..

 

I work with my employees so dating at work isn't an option and I'm over 40 and I don't drink so going to the bars is out...

 

Dating online isn't desperate.. it is the way I choose to meet people..

Most of the women I talk to are like me.. busy profeesionals that are done with the bar scene..

One day Lishy you will be done with the bar scene also..

 

Church doesn't work... and I'm too old to go back to school..

 

Lets see.. hitting on women at the gas pump doesn't work either

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Yes I see your point AC - Thanks for not shooting me I am having a great day today lol

 

I didnt mean to offend and I do think that online dating is different for men than women!

 

It is a personal choice for me and I shouldnt put MY choice on other people or insinuate that they may be desperate - I just think that girls under 40 who use dating sites can be percieved the worng way

 

I should shut up now before I DO get shot lol

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The ones I've met under 40 are somewhat different than the ones I've met in person and just ask out. guess it is the social circles one is in.

 

Online dating has it privledges in reading about someone before meeting if anything catches your eye like a smile, a keyword. If one wants to meet someone being in the most places is one of the best options to be in. Think of it as marketing where the product is you. There will be window shoppers, returners, keepers, negotiators, gawkers, etc... At least there are more potentials to weed out.

 

I used online dating to expand my markets passively sort of speaking.

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I Luv the Chariot OH

I don't see how online dating is any more pathetic than online friend-making, or even online forum-posting. We're all online right now. Who cares?

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BenefitOfTheDoubt

I've been using online dating sites for a little over a month, and my experience has been decent so far. All the guys I've met have been perfectly normal. No sparks for the most part, but nothing crazy either.

 

From talking to lots of people, I'm under the impression that my age and location help. I'm looking for guys in the 30-36 year old range, and as a group, the guys in that range are a bit less flakey than the younger guys. I'm also in one of the biggest cities in the US, and *so* many people are on Match here that any search I do -- no matter how specific and never beyond a 10-mile radius from my town -- returns the maximum number of hits. So I can be pretty picky and still have plenty to choose from.

 

My biggest recommendation: Get the guy on the phone as soon as possible, and if he's normal on the phone, set up a date ASAP. No point wasting a ton of time chatting over email. Might as well find out early if there's any chemistry, and go from there. And keep the conversation on the phone and in person if possible. People let things drag on longer than they need to if they're unfolding mostly over email or IM.

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My biggest recommendation: Get the guy on the phone as soon as possible, and if he's normal on the phone, set up a date ASAP. No point wasting a ton of time chatting over email. Might as well find out early if there's any chemistry, and go from there. And keep the conversation on the phone and in person if possible. People let things drag on longer than they need to if they're unfolding mostly over email or IM.

 

Good to know about the phone and ASAP.

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I'm thinking of putting up a profile. Anyone having luck with this? Is it worth paying for? Any tips?

its pretty much a waste of time from my own experience and about 90% of those I've talked with. Some do get lucky, however.

 

Its a good form of enteretainment and a good way to pass time but the lower your expectations the better off you'll be.

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Blimey... what a lot of bad opinions on ID (Internet Dating). Let me add a positive to A_C's...!

 

I've had 2 serious relationships from ID. One lasted 3 years, the lastest has lasted a year and he is moving in with me next month. We hope to be engaged by the end of the year. :love:

 

You DEFINATELY CAN meet good people on the internet. As A_C point's out, not all of us want to crawl around bars.. god I did that for 15 years already.. enough now!! I was busy with life, work etc. I wasn't meeting the type of men I wanted to meet when I did venture out, even though I tried to tailor where I went in an effort to meet more like minded people.

 

If you are bright you can usually work out the idiots from the sincere fairly quickly... although we can all make mistakes!! :laugh:

 

As a big PLUS in my mind, you can speak first and find out if you have anything in common personality wise before meeting. It saves alot of hassle. I've met men in bars before only to find out within a few dates that there was very little actually in common...

 

Most importantly.. have fun. Ohhh and it can be a great ego boost too...!

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Hey! I tried it a couple of months after I broke up w/ my ex of 5 years. It was a good distraction and I met a lot of men. A lot of flakes and one good guy! Marine, great personality and I met a younger woman who was just for the moment. A fling! Nothing serious though. Yet my intensions weren't to meet someone serious. Just fun and to pass time. What are you looking for? Just to make new friends? :bunny:

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