serial muse Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 Yes I see your point AC - Thanks for not shooting me I am having a great day today lol I didnt mean to offend and I do think that online dating is different for men than women! It is a personal choice for me and I shouldnt put MY choice on other people or insinuate that they may be desperate - I just think that girls under 40 who use dating sites can be percieved the worng way I should shut up now before I DO get shot lol Well, I won't shoot ya either, Lish, but as one of those girls, I just want to point out that this argument is a little roundabout...women under 40 who go on dating sites are often stereotyped as desperate or whatever, because people like to say this sort of stuff, so they keep that kind of (nonsense) perception alive long past its expiration date. Sorry, but it is nonsense. The thing is that lots of women I know in their 30s lead busy lives, don't want to date guys from work and aren't interested in the bar scene. It's as simple as that. Finding someone to date gets harder as you get older. There are fewer unattached people. But just because relative numbers are small doesn't mean absolute numbers are small. There are plenty of normal people on there to date. True, there are lots of crazy people out there, as there are everywhere. But my personal experience, to counterbalance some of the alarm-ringing, is this: I've been on several dates with guys from sites, and have had one long-term relationship and one that's currently getting up and running. I've never personally met any of the crazy ones. I've never met anyone who outright lied about anything that I could tell. They were just guys, some with better manners than others, some with better social skills than others. The ones I agreed to date had clearly read my profile carefully and responded to it. The guy I had the long-term relationship with was great in some ways, but we were incompatible in others. He may have been commitment-phobic, but there were other issues that superseded that. The guy I'm dating now is actually a bit more commitment-minded than I am - he's no commitment-phobe. I only dated the other guys 1-2 times, so it's hard to say. Really, the picture isn't nearly so bleak as you might think if you just read the horror stories. There's good and bad there. Finding the right person for you is hard; but that's the way it is anywhere! Link to post Share on other sites
Hungryhorse Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 Speaking from personal experience only of on line dating in the UK, I am sure some decent guys do it (er maybe?!) but I was unable to find them. The guys I found and dated on there were loners, unable to form any form of relationship due to inadequate social skills, or other problems. A lot of the types I met were not friendly, civil or polite and none of them had friends. A lot of guys I met had major problems one I met wanted to move in quick after which I found out he was up to his neck in debt, one was a recovering alcoholic who continually lectured me on the evils of drink when I wanted to go to a pub, despite smelling of beer on most dates! one had a serious personality disorder and asked my salary on the first date! Honestly I am friendly, well educated, slim and attractive with excellent manners but found the whole experience really frightening and also depressing. I would honestly advise leaving on line dating well alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts