???

[sammy]

I have been dating a girl for almost three months I feel things are going great between us. We are both in our early 30's. Here are a few questions I have. Would my insecurity show if I asked her how things are going between us? I have seen a change in our relationship, she says she misses me when I'm away,she has also become more affectionate in public than she used to be. My next question is how can I bring up the subject of her seeing other guys or asking her if I have any competition? We spend a lot of time together and just don't know if she would have time to see any one else. And if she says she is seeing other guys how can I tell her diplomatically that I would like her not too? Or is that asking too much due to the newness of our relationship?

[BeenThere]

Sammy, I think its perfectly natural to want to move into a more committed relationship after three months especially if it has become an intimate one.

 

I don't think its shows a lack of security to ask your partner where she sees the relationship going, if only to assess whether or not you are both interested in the same thing. It's also important to know if she is seeing other people on an "intimate" level because of the health risks involved. If it turns out she is, no matter how much the curiosty gets to you...it may, however, NOT be polite to ask "who."

 

Idealy, although casual sex seems to be the norm these days, its important to learn these things about your potential sex partner BEFORE you consummate the relationship especially if you think this may become an issue later on when you become fonder of that person. Most of the time, we get caught up in the unexpected moment and often neglect to even consider or ask about it.

 

It sounds as if she feels the same way you do. I think if you just tell her that you would like to see her exclusively she will respond in a positive way. Most women would prefer that their partners be monogamous (we're not unlike men) and she would be more than happy to reciprocate. And once you get through the awkwardness of "opening up," communication between the two of you will become better and the relationship stronger. Don't be afraid to speak your heart.

I have been dating a girl for almost three months I feel things are going great between us. We are both in our early 30's. Here are a few questions I have. Would my insecurity show if I asked her how things are going between us? I have seen a change in our relationship, she says she misses me when I'm away,she has also become more affectionate in public than she used to be. My next question is how can I bring up the subject of her seeing other guys or asking her if I have any competition? We spend a lot of time together and just don't know if she would have time to see any one else. And if she says she is seeing other guys how can I tell her diplomatically that I would like her not too? Or is that asking too much due to the newness of our relationship?