joel Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 heres my story as u guys now my situation when it comes to dating and girls-yea well nil to none, tried in college so far no success-gonna ask few more lets see what happens-even if they say yes i doubt its going to that far-maybe just one or max 2 dates-i ama such a rookie at 25 with a 15 yr old experience. well today and couple of days back eating dinner my mom - did mention to me indirectly about gaining a wife or meeting a gf in china-farming china that is.these girls in china -don't speakl english, can only cook and clean and bear children for u-kinda of like a mail order bride i guess-only into you for the canadian citizenship and to get out of the third world. i'm not a traditional person-i'm a canadiazed chinese cbc born-(yea i now my english sucks, so does my math-i just suck at school.) i can barely speak any cantonese-not even fluent, took manadrin-very beginners-can't even make a sentence up. this is not what i exactly have planned but i guess if i don't or can't find a gf or wife soon i guess it will be a solution-yea in my 30's or so-i mean i still hvae time to change but at the rate i'm goin -heck who nows- and when i finish college - wouldn't even be a rich person either. i guess my folks are pretty much ok to fine with it the idea since they are so tradional and all. if they had to choose between a white girl with a good career job and a girl from china who barely could speak english-my folks would pick the chinese barerly speaking girl. myself it be my total last solution. imagine marrying someone nowing they don't love you, all the want is a citizen card, and in todays society who can even live on one persons salary and support 2 kids-the man working and women staying at home, i mean u sure can jsut be cheap and budget-no my style anyone ppl here or now of anyone who was a canadized or westernized born asian -couldn't find their SO in north america and had to go east to find one. any advice on helping me out. been askin girls out and will keep on doin it-anymore advice Link to post Share on other sites
SuperMonk Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 Losers use mail order bride system, if you think you are a loser go for it. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 these girls in china -don't speakl english, can only cook and clean and bear children for u-kinda of like a mail order bride i guess-only into you for the canadian citizenship and to get out of the third world. so let me get this straight JOEL....you can go to china and get a wife who won't speak a word, will cook and clean all day long, and have sex with you? God damn boy, jump on this opportunity....you know how many dudes in US and Canada would love this situation??? Men dream of this stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 My uncle gave up and had an arranged marriage last year. There were some "oops" moments. Like the first girl he went to meet wanted him to sponsor like 40 of her relatives! yikes. He is very traditional, though, and fresh off the boat, so to speak. He's still not very fluent in english. He seems content with his arrangement and enrolled his wife in school because he wants her to go out and work. Anyways, this isn't a mail order bride system. It's a cultural tradition that some people want to preserve. Statistically, arranged marriages and much less likely to end in divorce. Arranged marriages are NOT mail order brides. The partners usually share similar family and cultural backgrounds and that can synch up well, for some. My advice, though, is that if you are already very westernized, you may not connect with someone who is a recent immigrant. I love my mom's family, but we don't get each other.... Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 6, 2006 Share Posted February 6, 2006 Anyways, this isn't a mail order bride system. It's a cultural tradition that some people want to preserve. Statistically, arranged marriages and much less likely to end in divorce. Arranged marriages are NOT mail order brides. The partners usually share similar family and cultural backgrounds and that can synch up well, for some. yes, I would agree with b_o totally. for those old world civilizations these arrangements work pretty darn well mainly because there is really no concept of "romantic love". People get married out of necessity and survival and to have kids which are much more objective reasons than "love". That is why so many marriages in the west fail, because they are based upon something that is totally subjective. people in the west have very little idea of what arranged marriages are all about. but in the end, when the dust settles, regular western-style marriage and eastern-style arranged marriage accomplish the exact same thing. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperMonk Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 yes, I would agree with b_o totally. for those old world civilizations these arrangements work pretty darn well mainly because there is really no concept of "romantic love". People get married out of necessity and survival and to have kids which are much more objective reasons than "love". That is why so many marriages in the west fail, because they are based upon something that is totally subjective. people in the west have very little idea of what arranged marriages are all about. but in the end, when the dust settles, regular western-style marriage and eastern-style arranged marriage accomplish the exact same thing. Dood, then you would prefer to be in a loveless/intimacy less relationship where you and the woman have nothing in common. sorry dood, this is 2006, wake up this isn't 1900 where people marry for survival. Link to post Share on other sites
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