WoWaddict Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 Hey everyone... i have a problem with anxiety. It's been tearing up my relationship with my fiance, and I'm trying to take steps to get in control of it. Is there anyone out there who's been through the same thing, or anyone who could offer advice? Link to post Share on other sites
iris54 Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Hi WoW - I've had the same problems with anxiety affecting my relationship that you mentioned...my problem was that I wasn't really intune with my issues. Do you know what is causing your anxiety or why it is relating to your fiance? I've been seeing a counselor and have been "working on me" (I still don't know exactly what that means) to get to the root of my issues and find out why they are carrying over into my relationship with my boyfriend. I hope things work out and keep us posted. Link to post Share on other sites
neek Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 WoW...is it about one or a few things specifically or just general axiety over who knows what? Does it also interfere with going to work or school, other relationships, etc.? And may I ask...(b/c I take your name to mean you actually play WoW)...how often and for how long do you play? Does that have anything to do with it? Like is it part of the problem or do you find it a release to play? Disregard if I took your name the wrong way. Link to post Share on other sites
LawGirl Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 I too had been having (mild) generalized anxiety. Went to see a counsellor about it. It seemed to stem from my 'relationship'. Relationship is now over - anxiety definately reduced. I coped by telling myself STOP whenever I started to feel it wave over me. Sometimes it worked. Breathing rythmically, in and out. Deep cleansing breaths, also helped. Figuring out the source is definately the first step. Link to post Share on other sites
JayKay Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 I used to have anxiety attacks. They are really awful. They make you feel like you're going to have a heart attack or like you're going crazy. I'd advise if you are drinking coffee to stop. Caffeine sure doesn't help. Make sure you get to bed at a reasonable hour. Being over-tired can worsen feelings of stress. Your bedroom should be a peaceful place. Paint it a restful color, get the TV and phone out of there, don't watch the news right before bed. Excercise. It really helps. Learn to express your feelings in meaningful ways; share them with close friends, in a journal or with a therapist. Also, if an anxiety attack hits you.....try not to panic. Realize it's a surge of chemicals through your body, but ultimately, it's not harmful. Try to imagine 'riding it out' like a wave. At one point the wave will peak, and then head down hill. The downhill ride is where the anxiety is diminishing. I used to envision that a lot because my anxiety attacks would hit me while I was driving or at work....really BAD times. I was so flooded with adrenaline, I swear I felt high as kite. I'd have bad, nightmarish feelings of unreality. But when I'd visualize just riding the wave, and being safe the whole time, the anxiety attacks went away faster and faster and I got fewer and fewer of them over time. I've been free of them now over ten years. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WoWaddict Posted February 11, 2006 Author Share Posted February 11, 2006 well ive always been a nervous person... a lifelong nailbiter which ive as of late been able to kick. But what caused me to really go off the wall was the problems i have with my family. My house was not a healthy enviornment for me to be in, so at the end of the summer I left and stayed with my fiance until I began my fall semester. This is what started it, because my family turned around and tried to cause all kinds of problems for me for separating myself from them. Then other things began to pile up. Constantly changing plans with my fiance about where we'd get an apartment, planning to move across the country, other relationship problems, school, money.... etc etc. It piled up to the point where I have panic attacks, and sometimes have a hard time rationalizing certain situations. I've been working on it a lot.... I even bought overcoming anxiety for dummies, which has helped outline some steps I can do. And yes, I play WoW.... but I find it relaxing. I had a panic attack in broadcast history the other morning. I breathed my way through it and felt great afterwards! Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 11, 2006 Share Posted February 11, 2006 I had a panic attack in broadcast history the other morning. I breathed my way through it and felt great afterwards! Congrats on that!! I KNOW how anxiety is, and how bad you feel during an attack...I suffer from an anxiety disorder and am currently seeing a therapist and doing Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. It has helped me learn more about how to cope with anxiety, face my fears and do lots of exposure therapy too. So much of it is NOT letting the anxiety take over, take control. Once you breathe through an attack and make it, you DO feel that sense of accomplishment! Do you do yoga? If not, start as soon as you can. This will help you keep an inner positive balance and help you when those attacks hit you. Do visualization as well. I alway have a place I go to in my head, I call it my happy safe place - and that helps control the anxiety, keeps me calmer. Keep posting and feel free to ask me anything about anxiety! I'm an open book now when it comes to that subject. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WoWaddict Posted February 13, 2006 Author Share Posted February 13, 2006 well as it turns out, me and my fiance are going to take a little bit of time apart. He's not sure how to handle helping with my anxiety problems, or if he can believe that I can change. I really didnt need this.... and i'm really trying hard to work through things. but he's leaving in a week to move to tenn... and he isnt sure if we can work things out while being apart. any advice or support? Link to post Share on other sites
Blackfog Posted February 22, 2006 Share Posted February 22, 2006 Hey everyone... i have a problem with anxiety. It's been tearing up my relationship with my fiance, and I'm trying to take steps to get in control of it. Is there anyone out there who's been through the same thing, or anyone who could offer advice? The most important thing I have realised by now is that knowing how to handle situations with confidence and ease is the solution that works in the long term. The problem lies within us and so does the solution. That way I am no longer in need of pills to sleep, medications to keep my depression at bay and doctors to keep wondering the inside of my head! I myself have been thru' a rough patch for sometime. ... I personally would opine that its high time we take reins of our lives and our thoughts and our feelings and not rely on use of medication or psychiatric help since it cannot go on forever and also for every trivial thing happening to us. selftherapy.org has gone a long way in helping me realise the worth of a tension free, happy living. I suggest you take a look at what they have to offer - it might be worth it for you. Else you've got nothing to lose! Link to post Share on other sites
Author WoWaddict Posted February 22, 2006 Author Share Posted February 22, 2006 hey everyone just a little update.... me and my fiance are back together, but taking things slow. He left on Monday morning but we did get to spend a beautiful week together before he did. I'm driving 14 hours to spend my spring break with him in Tenn. I've been working really hard to keep my anxiety at bay, and he's noticed the difference. He's even admitted to me that he has anxiety attacks when he's under stress. I think he realized we share a lot of the same feelings when it comes to anxiety. So we're working together, and I'm praying for the best! Link to post Share on other sites
Author WoWaddict Posted March 22, 2006 Author Share Posted March 22, 2006 i just wanted to update everyone.... i just got back from spring break. I found out the day i got home that he has been cheating on me. Now I have to go to the doctors and get tested for anything he may have given me. I guess my anxiety wasnt a problem after all, maybe it was just my gut telling me to run Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 That is just awful! I'm sorry that he's done this to you! Hope all goes well, healthwise. Link to post Share on other sites
hooghie Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 that jerk!!! I guess it's good that you found out though. Must be somewhat of a release to find out that you weren't imagining things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WoWaddict Posted March 22, 2006 Author Share Posted March 22, 2006 yeah i feel better knowing its not me but its a year out of my life that I cant get back Link to post Share on other sites
PYT Posted March 28, 2006 Share Posted March 28, 2006 I just wanted to agree with everything whichway advised you. I am an open book also and using the CBT exercises like the Tea form is what enabled me to get a handle on my anxiety. It takes a lot of work but is worth it if you use the exercises regularly. I also exercise regularly and do yogea when I can which also help. Sorry about your boyfriend but better you found out now than later! Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 25, 2006 Share Posted April 25, 2006 yeah i feel better knowing its not me but its a year out of my life that I cant get back Whether you realize it or not, you learned a great deal this past year. You seem mercurial in the way you're living your life; perhaps in being a year older and in sampling what you don't like in a type of guy, you'll soon be better prepared to identify what you DO like in a guy-- and subsequently you'll make a better choice the next time around. Link to post Share on other sites
PYT Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 Whether you realize it or not, you learned a great deal this past year. You seem mercurial in the way you're living your life; perhaps in being a year older and in sampling what you don't like in a type of guy, you'll soon be better prepared to identify what you DO like in a guy-- and subsequently you'll make a better choice the next time around. Excellent points. There is no such thing as wasted time, we are always gaining experience Link to post Share on other sites
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