mysticalstar Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 Hi. Hopefully someone can give me some advice! I just broke up with my boyfriend of a year and half...why who knows! I just started to lose feelings. Also the past few months I have been talking to my ex-boyfriend who I have been with off and on for the past few years and going behind my boyfriends back. So i just got tired of doing that and realized it wasn't fair to him so we ended it and it was mutual. Well now my old boyfriend is back in the picture again. For some reason he has always held a strong place in my heart. However, in the past he has cheated on me. Now i'm not trying to make any excuses...but we were young. He also did not treat me very well. He would always say he would call and then never would or he would always break plans. We would occasionally sleep together and then that would be it for a few weeks and then do it all over again. Everytime I would get a boyfriend he would jump back in the picture and be "interested." Well before this time it has been almost 2 years since we have been with each other. I think he played a part in my breakup because my feelings were starting to go towards him again. Anyways...I guess my question to you is...Do you think people can change? He has been good about our relationship this time calling all the time and doing things with me. We have not yet slept together this time. What do you think? Please let me know! Is it always once a cheater always a cheater? I hope not. I'm trying to keep a good outlook on it this time but my friends are all telling me to not do it. Which is why i want someone else's opinion!! thanks Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 i know old loves can be tempting, especially when they play the mixed-signals game--but what you described is a fairly well established pattern of behavior so a better question would be, why do you think he would have changed during this time? how much maturity over two years are years are you expecting? why would you put his prior pattern down to youthfulness when lots of adults do this too? i would tend to think that once you sleep with him, the old pattern will re-emerge. that's my guess, i could be wrong who knows what will happen? Link to post Share on other sites
simon sez Posted February 7, 2006 Share Posted February 7, 2006 As long as you keep him chasing, you will be ok. Once he has you, then he will start the same old song and dance that he did the last time.. Once a cheater... Always a cheater... Bank on it. If you won't listen to your friends advice, why are you going to listen to anybody? You seem to be looking for ONE person to tell you to go for it so that you are justified... My advice... Tell him you will go out with him but that you don't want to get serious with anybody right now and you want to date around and keep your options open... Watch him keep in constant pursuit once you do that. It is funny how women almost always want to get serious and know where the relationship is headed and as soon as they let the guy know that she is "his" for keeps, then the guy starts to lose interest and moves on to other challenges in his life. Don't fall for it.. Link to post Share on other sites
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