Can commitment phobia ever marry

[joefin]

Hi

Im dating a guy who is seeking professional help for commitment phobia. He is 39 and has never been or wanted to married before now. He has spent 4 months in theory dealing with his situation because he believes he would love to marry me and spend the rest of his life with me but is terrified of making the commitment. His phobia stems from a traumatic youth.

 

If there any possibility that someone can really get over this problem? If so how best can i support my partner? I want to be there for him as best i can.

[SuperMonk]

There's a book out there called "He's not all that into you" and it is true. I know when I am passionate about a woman I will want to marry her after having a relationship with her after a year or two. However, I'm speaking from my point of view which is late 20s. But someone who is in his late 30s, early 40s... if he's being "fickle" about marriage, trust me he's not that into you. Given his age, 39!

[luvtoto]

I know...after the day I had, I shouldn't be giving advice...but,

 

my x-fiance bowed out of our engagement because when he was raised by his dad...they spent tons of time together racing cars. He was on the verge of becoming professional. Well, when his dad met his step-mom, his dad's priorities changed drastically. No more racing. His step-mom and dad had babies and...well, you get the point. I, swear, he will never marry until his kids are raised and out of the house because he doesn't want his kids to be hurt by a step-mom. (eventhough I would never do that) We still talk and no matter how much he misses me...his childhood trauma is engraved in his mind. I suppose counselling would work, if he actually believed he had a problem. But, his boy is 16 now and I'm thinkin' he's gonna stick to his guns on this issue.