BRISEIS Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Okay, I wonder why do guys play mind games? This guy that I was involved with would always text me and being all over me and then when I respond, he can get distant. But any other time when I am busy and ignoring him, he is all in my space. I just don't understand him. So what's up with that? The rules of the game? Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 It's not men in general. It's him. Sounds like he has control issues. I don't play games, ever! Link to post Share on other sites
justsomeguy Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 The best answer is this: You don't need to figure it out. What you NEED to do is make a solution. If you are interested in him make a solution for that. That means probably seeing him in person and then the solution is offering him a date. Link to post Share on other sites
jt7054 Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 It's not men in general. It's him. Sounds like he has control issues. I don't play games, ever! I agree. I dont play games either. Thats an unfair generalization. In my experience, women play games just as much as men. As fas as your question, to me, he sounds like he is just interested in the thrill of the chase. When he knows youre interested, he loses interest because its no longer a challange or interesting. When he sees you pull away, he panics and does what he can to get you interested again. I think youd be better off to forget about him and look elsewhere. His types of issues dont just go away. He'll need to actually become aware of and work on his issues. Link to post Share on other sites
TheTallOne Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Why do women play games? He sounds insecure... and when you don't act interested, it spikes his insecurity that you don't like him.. so, he has to get close/interested again. Once you start acting interested, he'll back away as his validation for being wanted is fullfilled. Its f*cked.. I don't play those games anymore, someone always gets hurt. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 I think Thetallone is right... My boyfriend used to do this when we first met but it eventually stopped after about a year... I think he probably felt a little less insecure about our relationship? I think you should just let time tell... It might stop by itself... If not, just confront him gently about it. He might not even realise he's doing this! : ) Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Game-playing isn't gender-specific. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 SmoochieFace, I agree with you 100%. It isn't gender-biased, it's a mental thing, regardless of your sex. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Dan Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Not to be repetetive, but it's not men that play games. It's some men, and some women. I don't - but I've had my head and heart screwed over too many times by women not to learn to recognise the symptoms. Sometimes it's insecurity, and some time it's just games. The hard part is recognising which is which (I haven't figured it out yet). You need to ask yourself, is it worth the effort to find out?If so, then ask. If not, walk away. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperMonk Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 No, it's SOME men and MOST women. yeah, we don't know the whole story but he does hot and cold in "reaction" to how you treat him. what he's doing is not a game, but more like an issue of control. Link to post Share on other sites
InmannRoshi Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Its always baffled me in our culture of accepted misandry the women who most frequently equate men to simpletons, swine and barely evolved primates are yet convinced that men are also simultaneously such craftfull and skilled verbal manipulators that they are capable of bamboozling the most level headed skeptical woman. Kind of like how many of these misandric women will also claim men are shallow and can't look deeper than physical beauty, yet also turn around make contradictory claims that men are turned off by aggressiveness and intellect in a woman. Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Kind of like how many of these misandric women will also claim men are shallow and can't look deeper than physical beauty, yet also turn around make contradictory claims that men are turned off by aggressiveness and intellect in a woman. how is this contradictory? it seems consistent to me that if men can't look deeper than the physical, that they will be turned off by the intellect. not that i necessarily agree with the content. Link to post Share on other sites
hyakku Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Wait....LOL. Not to laugh at you, but look at this thread question. WHY do MEN play games!? HAHAHAHA. I'm sorry. You were serious weren't you? What type of question is why do men play games, you can be as good as you want with women, and men will still NEVER understand exactly what is going through a womans head. Men: Eat, Sex, Sleep, Love, Work. We eat to survive, have sex for leisure, sleep because its a necessity, we love the one woman we settle down with, and we work to ensure a comfortable life. Women I couldn't even start on. Really maybe he's just obsessive and when you respond he won't because he feels like he has no need to be. Some guys have a control problem, some don't, roll with the punches if you like him, if you don't drop him. Link to post Share on other sites
InmannRoshi Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 how is this contradictory? it seems consistent to me that if men can't look deeper than the physical, that they will be turned off by the intellect. not that i necessarily agree with the content. Are beauty and intellect mutually exclusive? Are men going to turn down the executive vice president with the great ass and the amazing rack for the mousy, frumpy admin assistant with the unibrow because she's simply less threatening to their seemingly fragile male egos? Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Are beauty and intellect mutually exclusive? Are men going to turn down the executive vice president with the great ass and the amazing rack for the mousy, frumpy admin assistant with the unibrow because she's simply less threatening to their seemingly fragile male egos? i'm not arguing the content--but saying that the two statements you referenced were not contradictory, logically. they were consistent, even if you disagree with the content. Link to post Share on other sites
InmannRoshi Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 The common stereotypes that a) men are so shallow as to only care about physical appearance and b) men are turned off by women who are too intelligent/aggressivene/assertive/successfull etc. are contradictory, since none of the traits in category b are about physical appereance. If men are only concerned with how beautiful a woman is, why would he even care how aggressive or passive she is? If she's hot, she's hot. Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 The common stereotypes that a) men are so shallow as to only care about physical appearance and b) men are turned off by women who are too intelligent/aggressivene/assertive/successfull etc. are contradictory, since none of the traits in category b are about physical appereance. If men are only concerned with how beautiful a woman is, why would he even care how aggressive or passive she is? If she's hot, she's hot. definition of contradictory adj 1: of words or propositions so related that both cannot be true and both cannot be false; "`perfect' and `imperfect' are contradictory terms" both your propositions, a and b, CAN be theoretically true at the same time, therefore they are not contradictory. in other words-- IF men really are so shallow as to only care about physical appearance, it COULD also be true that they are turned off by intellect. they would only be contradictory if proposition a and b could not be simultaneously true, in the logical sense. that being shallow etc meant that they could NOT be turned off by women's intellect or vice versa. once again please do not confuse the rules of logic with the content of the argument, i am not arguing that men are shallow or that a man cannot appreciate both brains and body. in other words, the propositions a and b may be false, but they are not contradictory to each other. Link to post Share on other sites
konfuzd Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Cygny, All the boys must be looking like scared little turtles right now after reading your arguments (glad you corrected his misuse of the word though!) Girls with brains are such a turn off InmannRoshi, Intelligence is only a turn off to those guys who don't have anything to offer in that department. If they were really smart, they'd realise what they're missing! Link to post Share on other sites
cygny Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Cygny, All the boys must be looking like scared little turtles right now after reading your arguments (glad you corrected his misuse of the word though!) Girls with brains are such a turn off haha, the ironic thing is that yes, i usually do try to hide my brain. for the reasons stated in the argument. lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 some people play games and others dont - Ours is not to reason why but to figure it out quick and get away from it! Link to post Share on other sites
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