Lil Honey Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 I've only read to Page 5, so I apologize if the main thrust of the conversation has changed. I'm only here long enough to put in this sidebar. I feel it only right to respond to these two posts: Page 2: A4A: Maybe they are looking to share with you, you are kinda telling them..... I dont give a fruck? Page 4: Newbby: but outcast, it is still ego. i am different, i dont care, i do care etc, it is all still ego. A person with Aspergers sometimes doesn't give a crap about what another person is saying, but it's not because he doesn't want to. It's because (as I understand it), they can't seem to focus on what is important to others. Or maybe more specifically, they can't seem to find it important that the other person is sharing the info with him/her. It isn't a CHOICE. AND, it isn't EGO. God. Okay. If you want to LEARN something, rather than have a pissing match, go to http://www.wrongplanet.net/ There is a forum there much like this one. You will be able to read the difficulty some folks have. For example: (I haven't been there for several months, but when I was) I read that a guy was having trouble understanding WHY people in the office greet each other in the morning. He expressed himself in his post by saying something like, "Why do they ask how I am? I'm at work, so I'm not sick." He also expressed the uselessness of such conversations. He wasn't full of himself. Just the opposite. Now. IMHO, if you don't like someone or their posts - including me/mine - just IGNORE it. Your day will be so much better. Have a good afternoon. Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 Good post, LH, and you are right - Aspies aren't *full of themselves* rather we sometimes have difficulty understanding things that seem to be understood without much effort by NTs. Although, I will say that I have the *basic greetings* part down pat. It's getting beyond that point where I encounter my difficulties - another fact that points to AS being a *spectrum disorder*... some cases are more acute than others. BTW... I dig that doggie av of yours... as long as she doesn't try to devour me! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 NTs. What are NT's? PS Control those bunny urges for Friday...Then you can make a pass at LH's doggie...Hehehe... Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 What are NT's? Neurotypicals - people whose minds work in a *typical* manner. Link to post Share on other sites
newbby Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 A person with Aspergers sometimes doesn't give a crap about what another person is saying, but it's not because he doesn't want to. It's because (as I understand it), they can't seem to focus on what is important to others. Or maybe more specifically, they can't seem to find it important that the other person is sharing the info with him/her. It isn't a CHOICE. AND, it isn't EGO. God. Okay. If you want to LEARN something, rather than have a pissing match, go to http://www.wrongplanet.net/ There is a forum there much like this one. You will be able to read the difficulty some folks have. lil honey, before you get all worked up, perhaps you should, either read the rest of the discussion and see what points people were actually making, or ASK the people what they meant by what they said. you obviously thought that i was referring to smoochie as having an ego in a derogatory sense. i wasnt actually talking about ANYONE in particular, and when i said ego, i meant as in sense of self/idea of self, as everybody has. maybe i am not very articulate, but i think this is pretty clear. the conversation then went on to outcast saying that hers and smoochies sense of self was more secure etc...which i did not argue with, because how the h£ll would I know? i hope you have taken the time to read the rest of the thread before you start jumping to anymore conclusions. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Neurotypicals - people whose minds work in a *typical* manner. Ah k. (My mind was in the gutter again. NT... ) Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 newbby, you do tend to cause a negative reaction by your use of the word 'ego'. Remember that you have to remember what everyone else understands by the word and govern yourself accordingly No but really I was fooled, too, because it does seem as though you use 'ego' in the more colloquial sense (i.e. 'conceit') rather than as Freud conceived it ('self'). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
newbby Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 newbby, you do tend to cause a negative reaction by your use of the word 'ego'. Remember that you have to remember what everyone else understands by the word and govern yourself accordingly No but really I was fooled, too, because it does seem as though you use 'ego' in the more colloquial sense (i.e. 'conceit') rather than as Freud conceived it ('self'). why does it seems so? please ignore the following: :bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 why does it seems so? please ignore the following: :bunny: Yes, Lil Honey certainly seems to enjoy starting threads off in this "I want to vent at people then scurry off and leave everyone else to deal with the resulting conflict" manner. She'll be back later on to see what strife has arisen so that she can paste a cold, parental rebuke to everyone. Link to post Share on other sites
loony Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 :bunny: :bunny: :bunny: :bunny: :bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
newbby Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Yes, Lil Honey certainly seems to enjoy starting threads off in this "I want to vent at people then scurry off and leave everyone else to deal with the resulting conflict" manner. She'll be back later on to see what strife has arisen so that she can paste a cold, parental rebuke to everyone. well as long as when she comes back she reads the posts, i dont mind. its just a bit annoying when somebody starts reacting to you without taking the time to listen first. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 well as long as when she comes back she reads the posts, i dont mind. its just a bit annoying when somebody starts reacting to you without taking the time to listen first. I would prefer if she actually read the original post to see where the poster was going with their comments: I said :Maybe they are looking to share with you, you are kinda telling them..... I dont give a fruck? Now if she would have read my entire comments she would have understood that I was trying to understand where Smooch was coming from. Far from an attack or blame on him in anyway. I cannot help to wonder if it is not an attempt to just stir trouble or come off as being a heroic guardian........ of course I could be wrong on both counts, but I do not wish to be included in unjust rants. So many people take things out of context without seeing the big picture, or without looking at why a person may make a comment. I of course was actually trying to learn how I could better communicate with Smooch..... what I was doing wrong perhaps.......shame on me.... stupid stupid me. a4a- 87 bottles of beer on the wall........ Link to post Share on other sites
Lil Honey Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 lil honey, before you get all worked up, perhaps you should, either read the rest of the discussion and see what points people were actually making, or ASK the people what they meant by what they said. you obviously thought that i was referring to smoochie as having an ego in a derogatory sense. i wasnt actually talking about ANYONE in particular, and when i said ego, i meant as in sense of self/idea of self, as everybody has. maybe i am not very articulate, but i think this is pretty clear. the conversation then went on to outcast saying that hers and smoochies sense of self was more secure etc...which i did not argue with, because how the h£ll would I know? i hope you have taken the time to read the rest of the thread before you start jumping to anymore conclusions. What I read was your post with very little detail in regard to your meaning. I apologize for not reading page after page to look for your meaning elsewhere. And if I misunderstood you and didn't ask what you meant, then it's not the first time that's happened on this site. I naturally thought the tone of that thread matched the tone of so many before it. Yes, Lil Honey certainly seems to enjoy starting threads off in this "I want to vent at people then scurry off and leave everyone else to deal with the resulting conflict" manner. She'll be back later on to see what strife has arisen so that she can paste a cold, parental rebuke to everyone. I cannot help to wonder if it is not an attempt to just stir trouble Yeah, if you read my other posts over the year or so that I've been here, I'm just a big trouble maker. Whatever . . . As far as I know, I have a right to vent and others have a right to post or ignore as they choose. What others say in posts after mine, I can't be responsible for. Further, in my post in the venting section (appropriately placed, I might add), I even said something to the effect that if you didn't like it, there was no need to post. I was simply venting. its just a bit annoying when somebody starts reacting to you without taking the time to listen first. Someone else could say the SAME thing. If you re-read my OP, you will see that I wasn't "attacking" or being snotty with anyone. I took two posts from another thread and pointed out how that way of thinking doesn't fit the particular situation/person. Sheesh. I only shared that bit of info and the web address for better/further understanding. I intended it to be a positive. I'm sorry I was wrong. I'm going to "scurry off" now. I hope that's okay. I actually have work to do. Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 I do not wish to be included in unjust rants. So many people take things out of context without seeing the big picture, or without looking at why a person may make a comment. I of course was actually trying to learn how I could better communicate with Smooch..... what I was doing wrong perhaps.......shame on me.... stupid stupid me. a4a- 87 bottles of beer on the wall........ There's been a lot of semi-focused ranting going on...saying "if you don't like my post, just ignore it" comes across to me as an attempt to impose a get-out clause...eg I only want to hear from people who hear from me. I don't care if this offends anyone, so don't complain about it etc etc. I think most people do rant at times, but thereafter the board seems to be divided into people who will apologise for their rants and engage in a bit of introspection, and people who would sooner sleep on a bed of nails than admit "perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps I was unfair. I lost my temper a bit - I'm sorry." God - I blew my top the other day, then in another thread when I apologised for doing so the apology was ignored and further lecturing ensued. I generally try to see both sides of a conflict...but it's getting increasingly difficult to appreciate the perspective of that tiny minority who seem to be convinced that they have the monopoly on truth, empathy, knowledge and all the other tools that are involved in helping people to live happier lives. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 There's been a lot of semi-focused ranting going on...saying "if you don't like my post, just ignore it" comes across to me as an attempt to impose a get-out clause...eg I only want to hear from people who hear from me. I don't care if this offends anyone, so don't complain about it etc etc. I think most people do rant at times, but thereafter the board seems to be divided into people who will apologise for their rants and engage in a bit of introspection, and people who would sooner sleep on a bed of nails than admit "perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps I was unfair. I lost my temper a bit - I'm sorry." God - I blew my top the other day, then in another thread when I apologised for doing so the apology was ignored and further lecturing ensued. I generally try to see both sides of a conflict...but it's getting increasingly difficult to appreciate the perspective of that tiny minority who seem to be convinced that they have the monopoly on truth, empathy, knowledge and all the other tools that are involved in helping people to live happier lives. I think a good vent is needed by all from time to time as long as it is just and you are willing to communicate with the person, or people you are ranting about. That applies I think more when you point out specific people like LH has done here. This was also done in another post not long ago. The "just ignore it if you don't like" it is not mature IMHO. It just adds to the offense IMHO. Oh well, you live ya learn. Of course there are those that come off as a self proclaimed Guru of all human behavior. Which tend to be the people that seem to fling more poo and are actually less understanding that to be human is to be imperfect. This is my ignorant observation of course a4a- what are we having for lunch today? Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 I'm going to "scurry off" now. I hope that's okay. I actually have work to do. Although I DON'T have work to do (wah! ) I may *hop off* too. I'm gonna relax and let the lil ones watch over the warren. All sorts of big bad things lurking out there and they can be a threat to the stability of the fort. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 What is up with these boards lately? Why can't we like or dislike people based on our own opinions? Ya know, I was one of the people who got their panties in a bunch about people being sensitive to developmental and mental issues, but you know what? I give up. You can only control YOU and YOUR REACTIONS to situations. TO attempt to do anything further will only result in frustration and hurt feelings. Like this WHOLE HUGE thing that is totally unnecessary. Link to post Share on other sites
Lil Honey Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Oh, Good GAWD. In my rant the other day, I prefaced my rant, because it wasn't important to me whether ANYONE posted - whether they agreed or not. In fact, I was going to delete it, but what told that I waited too long, which I don't understand, but that's a whole 'nother topic. I regret having posted this or the other one. And I never said one member can't like or dislike another member. I just don't care for HOW some treat others. Period. And that's just my opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 And I never said one member can't like or dislike another member. I just don't care for HOW some treat others. Period. And that's just my opinion. That is exactly what I am saying......... not to get into a pee match over it. But you have offended people with your rant by pointing out specific posters. That is all. No big deal. You pointed and others pointed it back. Again no big deal. Just a big........ Whoa wait a minute there LH ........ moment. a4a- If I had a hammer, I'd hammer in the morning.......... Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 I'm frustrated. I am not trying to project this on anyone in particular. But I get this way IRL. I don't like dragging things out. Either we let it go or we talk about it ad nauseum. I think we've already filled the "admauseum" quota". I disagree with the way MANY people are treated all over the world on a daily basis. The entire country of Tibet, for example. But I can't control how other people act and dwelling on being unhappy or irritated does no one any good. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 I'm frustrated. I am not trying to project this on anyone in particular. But I get this way IRL. I don't like dragging things out. Either we let it go or we talk about it ad nauseum. I think we've already filled the "admauseum" quota". ad nauseum. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 I'm frustrated. I am not trying to project this on anyone in particular. But I get this way IRL. I don't like dragging things out. Either we let it go or we talk about it ad nauseum. I think we've already filled the "admauseum" quota". . Well too bad I don't feel that way. I think you are being mean to me for saying that! You need to take that angry muff of yours to a good certified trainer before she really hurts somebody! Keep her on a leash ok. sheeeeeeesh! Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Well too bad I don't feel that way. I think you are being mean to me for saying that! You need to take that angry muff of yours to a good certified trainer before she really hurts somebody! Keep her on a leash ok. sheeeeeeesh! If I remember correctly she did say earlier that it was leashed outside.. Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Well too bad I don't feel that way. I think you are being mean to me for saying that! You need to take that angry muff of yours to a good certified trainer before she really hurts somebody! Keep her on a leash ok. sheeeeeeesh! Yes - sorry if this has already been covered, but what the hell is that thing in your avatar B_O? I'm pretty sure the square shaped bit is a mouth...but are those two dots ears or eyes? Is it a Dulux dog without any ears? An impossibly fluffy, tiny featured rabbit? An albino, earless gerbil? Please, before I insult your pet any more....name that species! Also, am I right in thinking that it's sitting on the end of an ironing board? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Yes - sorry if this has already been covered, but what the hell is that thing in your avatar B_O? I'm pretty sure the square shaped bit is a mouth...but are those two dots ears or eyes? Is it a Dulux dog without any ears? An impossibly fluffy, tiny featured rabbit? An albino, earless gerbil? Please, before I insult your pet any more....name that species! Also, am I right in thinking that it's sitting on the end of an ironing board? I continue being diverted by the guesses, but I admitted to Art that this is an alien I caught hiding behind my computer. It was waiting to post mean things and neg rep everyone while I was asleep! And the damn thing wasn't even signing it's neg rep point comments. It's chained in the front yard and I feed it cheetos. We sit down and have daily bitch sessions when I put my rep point screen up at night and cry tears of blood and sweat and shake my fist at the heavens. The alien would shake an angry fist as well, if it had one. Link to post Share on other sites
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