Love lost????---Need assistance !!

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OK, what follows constitutes my first ever forum posting, so please forgive me if my forum etiquette is not up to par. Here is my situation.

 

I am madly in love with my wife. We were married about 4 months ago, and things have been absolutely rotten ever since. We lived together for a couple of years before getting married, so the whole cohabitation shock thing is probably not a factor. She expressed concerns over her feelings about the wedding about 2 months before the date was to happen. Up until then, she was really excited and happy and then poof, it all evaporated. She said that she felt like she was developing cold feet and thought it would pass. She said she was afraid of losing her independence and missing out on a portion of her life.

 

I should mention here that she is 24 years old and I am 5 years her senior. On top of her "cold feet" she told me that she had developed a fairly severe crush on a good friend of mine, and didn't know what to think about that.

 

On top of all this, we stopped having sex with any regularity over a year ago because she said she didn't like the way it made her feel afterwards. There was never a problem during, but afterwards there was sometimes crying and what she described as an "icky feeling". Now I like to think that I am leaning toward the sensitive side of the spectrum when it comes to average human males, and I just want her to be happy, which she clearly is not with me. She says that she loves me and wants to be with me, but we are both miserable with the current trend.

 

I came up with the idea that maybe she needed to get away from me for a while to look at things more objectively, and she decided to go visit a friend far away for a while. She has not actually left on this excusion yet, but it is in the works. In the meantime, things are intolerable around the house. It feels like she is picking fights all the time and then accusing me of having instigated the whole thing. It is becoming quite maddening. I have no idea what to think or to do. Never in my life have I felt so helpless to affect my own existence.

 

I want to be with her, but not if she doesn't want to be with me. I suspect that she may not be being honest with herself about her feelings, and staying with me because it's simply what is familiar. This is not a healthy situation for either of us, and I don't know what to do. Please please please, any advice ya'll might have on this subject would be greatly appreciated.