Ash03 Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 Ok So i have a long story. I've been with my b/f for over 4 years, I cheated on him about 2 years ago and every since then it's like I'm not attracted to him anymore. I had so much fun with the other guy even though we never actually dated, it was always just sex. I feel so bad my b/f still doesn't know, I haven't even talked to that guy in a long time. But that's not what this is about, recently I met this other guy, and we've been talking through text messages and my b/f does know that. Well a few weeks ago I went to this guys house and we came really close to having sex but we didn't although I did give him a blow job. When I told him about my b/f he was a little upset but he agreed to still be friends. Last night I went over to his house again, I told my b/f I was going with him to the store, so he knew who I was with. Well this time we came even closer to having sex, I felt bad, so I changed my mind last minute, he had his condom on and everything, then I said no. He said he is not mad at me and he understands if I'm not ready. He's a really nice guy!! The next time I saw him he was wearing makeup eyeliner, powder everrthing! It was kind of weird, I still like him though. My b/f went through my cell and found out I was at his house, and he was very angry with me so when I told this guy what happened he told me he's not what I need or what I'm looking for but he still wants to be friends. I don't know exactly what he means. Or why I still even care after seeing him in makeup and I do have a b/f. I'm so confused anyone have any advice. Please help. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 How is a BJ not considered sex? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 You need to break up with your BF.. Right away.. as your not capable of loving him the right way.. show some class Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ash03 Posted February 9, 2006 Author Share Posted February 9, 2006 I guess I forgot to mention my b/f and I have a child together and we live together i can't just leave him I don't have anywhere to go. I can't afford to support myself. I'm not exactly sure what to do. Link to post Share on other sites
i'mhurt Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 be honest with yourself and set yourself free. He deserves the truth. It maybe hard and painful right now to be completely honest with him (and yourself) but you’ll have no regrets later. You both deserve better in life. Especially your child. Good luck. And yes these types of behavior make men believe that all women are evil. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 How would you feel if your boyfriend was doing to you what you are doing to him? Clearly you are just using your boyfriend. If you had any respect for your boyfriend at all you would tell him the truth. What goes around comes around. Link to post Share on other sites
Sassy Posted February 9, 2006 Share Posted February 9, 2006 I guess I forgot to mention my b/f and I have a child together and we live together i can't just leave him I don't have anywhere to go. I can't afford to support myself. I'm not exactly sure what to do. Is that the reason you are still with him? You shouldn't use your bf just because you have no where to go.. You don't want to be with him why stay? You need to break up with your bf because a bj is sex and that is cheating. Link to post Share on other sites
THX2000 Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 I guess I forgot to mention my b/f and I have a child together and we live together i can't just leave him I don't have anywhere to go. I can't afford to support myself. I'm not exactly sure what to do. Wow. So you are not only cheating on the guy but using him because you can't support yourself so you leech off him. All class.....all class. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TeaCooler Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Wow. So you are not only cheating on the guy but using him because you can't support yourself so you leech off him. All class.....all class. i agree, and i'll be nicer this time when i say that this kind of behavior makes all women look bad and gives people reasons to say bad things about them. get some self-respect. Link to post Share on other sites
Delectable Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 Wow. So you are not only cheating on the guy but using him because you can't support yourself so you leech off him. All class.....all class. are you serious? The VERY LEAST you can do is show your boyfriend what you wrote in your initial entry and give him the opportunity to love himself and do whats best for him and your child since you won't. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 I'm not exactly sure what to do. quit being trashy(and believe me, im only using that word cuz the real one i want to use would most assuredly get censored) and sleeping with men who arent the father of your child. This is just pathetic, I feel bad for the bf AND for the child, this chicks f*cking up both their lives. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 I wounder if this means that he was having sex with her after the initial betrayal ... ew, nasty. Worst thought a b/f can have aside from his g/f giving it up to another guy is that the b/f be mixing his stuff with the other guy's... Posts like this are prime reason never, ever to support your s/o financially. Link to post Share on other sites
yawhatever Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 BJ is even worse than sex.. emotionally.. you can't even kiss after that. I think you should confess , feel better, and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 You're not having fun with your current boyfriend for two years already so he is obviously not the right one for you. You're also cheating on him; despite of your beliefs that only penetration is cheating, blow jobs, kissing, touching, and putting a condom on - is also cheating. I think you should break off that relationship and find the right one. The other guy sounds like he wants to be with you, at least sexually, but he has skeletons in his closet. Link to post Share on other sites
yawhatever Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 Yeah if your not happy or are cheating its a good time to tell them, just reveal the truth. I dont know how your bf feels about you but your giving him false hope, depends on how he thinks of you ofcourse. I agree with above tho. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 All judgement aside, it seems like you are confused and unsure of your feelings about all the individuals involved in this situation. I wonder why you are being so reckless with yourself and why you have intentionally engaged in behvaior that can potentially create a lot of emotional chaos in your life. My opinion, of course is worth less than dirt to you -- so take it with a grain of salt. But the way you treat other people you are emotionally involved with very often reflects how you feel about yourself and how you should be treated, in this case, it would appear you have a low opinion of your worth. I think it would pay off to examine that, otherwise you may well find yourself in a string of emotionally chaotic situations that will ultimately be unhealthy and destructive not only for you, but your child as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Poconobob Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 Kid or not, you are using the man... even still, it is hard to understand how you don't want him, yet you think telling him about going to the store is telling the truth. I know you are here for help but the help you want lies in the text you wrote and also "lies" with how you are not telling the truth. You cannot be happy with your b/f if you arent in the open yourself, after all, you have to love yourself before loving someone else (children excluded)... I HOPE this made sense, I must emphasize that unloading the burden held inside will not only release pent up emotions but also help you grow from it and then you'll kind of then be able to access your situation. However, for me, I can opinionize this one point, YOU owe him the truth....Now please note I say opinionize because your particular situation, his temper, how much cash you have, etc... all dictate the real world. You can tell him the truth and if you are bad off, you could be on the street, WE ALL KNOW that you aren't going to do that... even though YOU need to tell the truth, ultimately, you have to do self preservation too. Good luck bob Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted March 7, 2006 Share Posted March 7, 2006 I guess I forgot to mention my b/f and I have a child together and we live together i can't just leave him I don't have anywhere to go. I can't afford to support myself. I'm not exactly sure what to do. you cant leave him but you can give other guys bjs and sex? my printers broke, someone print me out a copy of this, I'm gonna send it to george bush with a proposition for a new law called "why certain people shouldn't be allowed to procreate" and I intend to use this as example number 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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