Ericka Jill Posted February 10, 2006 Share Posted February 10, 2006 This happened to me alot during college years ago: I'd pal around with my brother and his friends and we had so much fun just being kids and enjoying life. The next thing I knew, I was being proposed to by one or the other of my brother's friends (no, brother didn't pay them to do this). My brother eventually told me to '"STOP IT" and wouldn't let me play with them anymore. Even the guys I dated on my own would propose to me within a few months. One guy turned out to be a stalker who wanted to kill me rather than share me (that put an end to my dating real quick). Now that I remember, over the years, a few co-workers fell in love with me, too (awkward). And no, I'm not a cute bimbo, I'm a scientist. I really don't believe I led anyone on....we just had fun hanging out. But, you know, I really LISTENED to them ~ that may have been the problem. Some people might wish they had my problem, but it isn't fun telling someone you don't share their feelings. In fact, it is pretty awful. Now I'm much older and am getting out of a bad long-term marriage and have given Internet dating a try. I make it clear from the start that I'm only looking for friends and need to take things slow. I'm running into the same thing again...very possessive men wanting to talk constantly on the phone and professing love after only a few dates. One man who has committed himself to God is now confessing his love for me ~ for christ's sake! Oh wait! Maybe I'm only attracting crazy men?? Is this normal??? Are men that starved for someone to talk to that they fall in love so very quickly? I haven't dated in 13 years and I just don't know the rules anymore. But I do know I still have the survival instinct to run and hide when anyone professes love for me after only a few dates. Is it very rude to drop out of sight when a guy does this? Darn, I hate this, but I do miss doing the fun things that guys like to do. I've sworn off men again for now but my women friends are all so busy with work/family and can't come out to play very often. Help. Any advice about the new dating rules will be very much appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted February 11, 2006 Share Posted February 11, 2006 Think about the kind of people you're talking to over the internet. I am not trashing internet dating, but each venue has its advantages and disadvantages, and dating people with poor social interaction skills is a risk when you pick someone up online. If you're not having any luck with online dating, try volunteering for a few causes you believe in and network a little...see what you can come up with that way. I don't think the rules have changed that much, although with more time spent indoors and at home, I think social anxiety has increased. Link to post Share on other sites
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